


50 First Kisses

by Gedry



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/F, F/M, First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-06
Updated: 2017-11-05
Packaged: 2019-01-30 02:26:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 50
Words: 51,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12644253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gedry/pseuds/Gedry
Summary: Prompt fills for 50 First Kisses.





	1. Kiss 1: Fairy Tale

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. Dean/Gabriel, fairytale  
> 2\. Balthazar/Lisa, cinnamon  
> 3\. Dean/Gabriel, Music  
> 4\. Jo/Lucifer, rain  
> 5\. Gabriel/Andy, sweet ride  
> 6\. Sam/Gabriel, sun shower  
> 7\. Anna/Jo, Irish coffee!  
> 8\. Gabriel/Kali -- blood and chocolate  
> 9\. Dean/Cas, awkward or shy (or both)  
> 10\. Sam/Gabriel - summer showers  
> 11\. Dean/Uriel, heat of battle  
> 12\. Dean/Castiel, sweet cherry pie and The ReBoot!  
> 13\. Sam/Lucifer, first time  
> 14\. Castiel/Gabriel, flying  
> 15\. Sam/Gabe school play   
> 16\. Dean/Cas camp fire  
> 17\. Adam/Elijah, rainbow  
> 18\. Dean/Cas High School AU – Prom  
> 19\. Sam/Gabe – Library  
> 20\. Sam/Gabriel, to keep Gabriel quiet  
> 21\. Lucifer/Gabriel - coming home  
> 22\. Adam/Chuck – save  
> 23\. Adam/Elijah, library  
> 24\. Gabe/Becky – magic?  
> 25\. Sam/Castiel, mouth-to-mouth(as in reviving)  
> 26\. Dean/Lucifer, supposedly accidental  
> 27\. Dean/Gabriel ice cream  
> 28\. Dean/Cas – Ikea  
> 29\. Adam/Jo - Homecoming game  
> 30\. Dean/Cas – Cassiopeia  
> 31\. Dean/Cas flannel pjs  
> 32\. Dean/Gabriel – Tears  
> 33\. Jo/Crowley-swap meet/ garage sale  
> 34\. Sam/Gabe Truth or Dare (the game)  
> 35\. Dean/Cas, Zeppelin (penguin)  
> 36\. Dean/Cas, slow burn  
> 37\. Dean/Cas: priorities or coming home  
> 38\. Dean/Cas. Cat adoption – and the continuation.   
> 39\. Lucifer/Sam – forgiveness  
> 40\. Sam/Gabriel - blood addiction  
> 41\. Adam/Elijah, ice cream  
> 42\. Dean/Castiel, zoo  
> 43\. Sam/Gabriel, tongue piercing  
> 44\. Dean/Cas Ferris wheel (preferably stuck on it)  
> 45\. Sam/Gabriel - fast cars and faster hands  
> 46\. Sam/Uriel – curiosity  
> 47\. Bobby/Rufus/Crowley- in the park  
> 48\. Dean/Cas - summer love  
> 49\. Dean/Castiel – accidental  
> 50\. Castiel/Gabriel - "instructional demonstration"

Title: Kiss 1  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 514  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses - Fairytale. 

Kiss 1

“Not like that,” Dean argues with his friend as they rearrange their toys into a new configuration. “I’ll be the cowboy and you be the Indian. I’ll chase you.”

“What happens when you catch me?” Gabriel asks as he sets his toy unicorn down by Dean’s pony. 

“I shoot you,” Dean shrugs. 

“I don’t want you to shoot me,” Gabriel says with a shake of his head. “My mom says guns are bad.”

“Guns help protect people,” Dean says with authority. “At least that’s what my dad says.” 

“Your dad uses guns to shoot the bad guys,” Gabriel comments as he tugs on his cape. “I’m not a bad guy.”

“Sure you are,” Dean teases. “You pulled Anna’s hair this morning and then you stuck glue to Uriel’s art. He was mad.”

“I’m NOT A BAD GUY!” Gabriel shrieks. His eyes well up with tears and Dean freezes before looking frantically around for the daycare teachers. If he can’t get Gabriel to be quiet he knows they are both going to be in trouble for the third time today.

The third time is bad, that’s when they call your parents.

“Okay,” Dean rushes to reassure his friend. “You’re right; you’re not a bad guy. We can play something else.”

“Like what?” Gabriel sniffs. 

“I don’t know,” Dean says as he puts his cowboy hat on the ground. “You pick.”

“How about we play princes,” Gabriel immediately brightens at the idea of his favorite game. 

“Fairytales are for girls,” Dean sighs. “I’m not a girl. Girls are gross.”

“I’m not a girl either,” Gabriel points out before lifting his cape up over his head and exclaiming, “Fairytales are AWESOME! They have knights and dragons and sword fights. You can fight trolls and go on a quest and all kinds of neat stuff.”

“What about the kissing?” Dean asks with dubious look on his face. “There’s always kissing in fairytales. 

That stumps Gabriel for a minute, Dean’s right. There’s always kissing in fairytales. 

“We can skip it,” Gabriel offers. “Since neither of us are girls.”

“That’s cheating,” Dean says with a shake of his head. “We can’t cheat if we’re knights. They’re the good guys.”

“So we have to kiss,” Gabriel reasons. It sounds logical to a five year old. 

“I guess so,” Dean squirms. He pops his head up from their powwow and does a quick scan around for teachers. Once he’s sure no one is watching he leans forward, over the toy pony and beside the unicorn, and presses his lips to Gabriel’s. 

It’s dry and fast, but it meets the fairytale requirement. 

“Want to go slay the dragon now?” Gabriel offers as he gets to his feet. 

“Sure,” Dean grins as his picks up the battered plastic shield in the dress up box. 

And off they go.


	2. Kiss 2: Cinnamon

Title: Kiss 2  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Balthazar/Lisa  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 613  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Cinnamon. 

Kiss 2

She’s beautiful, Balthazar has always thought so. Lisa has this light about her that makes her seem like she glows in a totally non-maternal way for him. 

So maybe he’s going to Hell for lusting after his younger brother’s boyfriend’s baby mama. 

Though in his head it sounds dirtier than it really is. Dean and Lisa were a weekend hook up twelve years ago. Ben’s a great kid too. When Lisa tracked Dean down two years ago Balthazar had immediately seen the resemblance. 

It had been a complicated situation to work out. If Castiel had not been the kind of man he is Balthazar is pretty certain it would have turned ugly. 

Dean’s a good guy, but emotions are not his strong point. Being stuck between a relatively new love affair with a man; and suddenly finding out he’s a father left him torn and confused. But Castiel had stepped up and invited Lisa in and now she and Ben live in Castiel’s old house down the street and Castiel moved in with Dean. 

It’s a little bazaar as far as families go, but Balthazar likes a little weird with his coffee in the morning. 

And with his wine at night…now he just has to figure out how to get Lisa to join him for a night cap. 

“They’re having fun,” she comments and it draws him out of his thoughts to the scene unfolding in the yard. Dean has the water hose out and is mercilessly spraying both his son and his lover with water while they run for cover. 

Balthazar laughs, “If he turns that thing up here to spray us your child will grow up without a father.”

Lisa snorts and rolls her eyes. He appreciates the gesture; life has to occasionally be difficult for her living as the sometimes mother figure to all of them. Between Dean’s brother, Sam, and his and Castiel’s siblings, Lisa is pretty much the only female. 

The Wendy to their Peter Pan. 

“Do you ever wish for the presence of more estrogen in our little group?” He questions. 

“Why?” She shoots back. “Do you finally have a girlfriend?”

He glares at her before bumping their shoulders together affectionately. “I have my eye on someone,” he offers. “I’m just not sure they’re available.”

“Available or Accessible?” Lisa asks 

“Hmm,” Balthazar thinks about it for a moment. “Neither, both maybe. Honestly I’m not even sure she’s interested.”

“Tough times,” Lisa says with a nod. “You should try my coffee. I added some cinnamon to it this morning. It goes with the hazelnut. I’m wanting a second opinion that doesn’t involve Dean harassing me about ruining good coffee.”

Balthazar laughs, “I’ll go get a cup.”

He hesitates when she puts her hand on his arm. “I’ve got the last of it in mine.” 

He holds out his had for the coffee cup and is a little surprised when Lisa winks at it and drains the cup right in front of his face. 

“It’s going to be hard to taste that now,” Balthazar murmurs as he reaches up to brush his fingers over her cheek. 

“You’ll figure it out,” She grins. 

She’s still smiling when he leans in and brushes his lips against hers. Her arms come up to circle around his waist and tug him closer.

She’s just opening her lips for him when Dean sprays them both with the hose.


	3. Kiss 3: Music

Title: Kiss 3  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 515  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Music. 

Kiss 3

There’s a slow drag of lips against his before a teasing tongue follows to press against his mouth and tease him into opening. Dean groans as he lets his head sink further against the arm of the couch and Gabriel presses him down and slips into the opening between his spread thighs. The smaller man fits so well there, Dean wants to curl up around him and hold on forever. 

He’s not sure when he started thinking of Gabriel like that; not certain when his flirty friend with benefits bled into a person he started feeling like he couldn’t live without having close by. 

It was just sex, once upon a time. They would get together, just Dean and Gabriel and Gabriel’s guitar. Dean would sing, they would goof off, drink beer, and fall into bed together for a quick tension relieving roll in the hay. It usually matched the music they created together that night. Rock and roll left them panting and filthy, a little side of country and they might actually be able to move without being sore the next day. 

It’s been fun, for both of them judging by Gabriel satisfied smiles and teasing expressions. But more and more often Dean’s been aching for something more than just a quick hit and a catch you later. He’s been more in the mood for something soulful, more like Jazz. 

It had taken him a week of hit and misses to be brave enough to give it a shot. Tuesdays are their usual night but Gabriel was working late. Dean had managed to work himself up for it on Thursday but then he’d eaten something not fit for human consumption and paid a horrible price for it. They settled on Saturday night and it was all he could do to keep his hands to himself while Gabriel took the guitar out of its case and got settled. They only made it through the first rough run of the tune when Gabriel looked at him suspiciously. 

Dean had shrugged and they played it again, the second time Gabriel stopped playing a little over halfway through the piece and asked “Are you sure?” 

Dean’s never been so sure of anything in his whole life. So they’re not managing to practice much tonight, but they aren’t headed to the bedroom either. This is new, soft and fragile between them and they both want to nurture it into something wonderful. So they settle against each other a little more comfortably on the old sofa and Gabriel hums in contentment and happiness even though they’re fully clothed as Dean rubs their tongues together and slides his hands up under the back of Gabriel’s shirt. 

And maybe music really is the food of love. It’s just taken them a while to find the perfect recipe.


	4. Kiss 4: Rain

Title: Kiss 4  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Jo/Lucifer  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 515  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Rain. 

Kiss 4

It rained during graduation, forcing the ceremony indoors and limiting the number of people invited to watch. Lucifer has a big family, lots of siblings to take up room and even then some of them weren’t able to get permission to attend. Jo had pretty much come to terms with the fact that girlfriends don’t really even have a shot at clapping for you if you brothers won’t get a seat. 

So she is certainly not standing on the outside of the auditorium, pressed against a pillar in the shade as she watches the rain pour down while she feels sorry for herself. Jo doesn’t pout, her mother wouldn’t tolerate it. 

She’s understandably surprised when she feels the warm press of someone’s lips against her shoulder and it’s only his deep chuckle at her jerking motion that keeps her from punching her boyfriend in the mouth. 

“What are you doing here?” She questions as Lucifer steps closer to her and wraps an arm around her waist. 

“Watching you work your grumpy out before the ceremony ends,” He murmurs as he presses a second kiss to her temple. 

“Is it over already?” Jo questions. There’s no one else out here, most of the people who weren’t allowed in had made plans to reconnect after the formal graduation for a celebration. But Jo had ridden in Lucifer’s car so she was stuck waiting. 

“No,” he answers as if it’s not a big deal. “I’m sure it’s still going on right now.”

“Then why aren’t you in there?” Jo gasps as she shoves at his shoulders trying to push him back toward the doors. “You’re going to miss it. Go!”

“I don’t care,” he huffs as he clings to her hands until she stops struggling. “It means nothing to me.”

She gives him the face at they both know means she doesn’t believe him. 

“I’m not going to have you waiting around out here in the rain while I sit inside, bored out of my mind, to get a rolled up sheet of paper that isn’t even really my diploma,” Lucifer shrugs. “You’re more important. If you’re not there it doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to your father,” Jo points out. Lucifer has the grace enough to flinch. They both know his father’s approval has always meant a lot to him. 

“He’ll get over it,” Lucifer says firmly, nodding as he adds, “I’m getting over it.”

They regard each other silently for a moment before she pulls him closer and kisses him until the tension eases out of his face. He slumps against her and tangles his fingers gently in her hair as he whispers, “So I’ve been thinking.”

She snorts and he tickles her until she begs him to stop. 

“I’m serious,” he chuckles as she kisses him again. “How inappropriate do you think it would be for you finish the last two years of your education as a married woman?”

“It would be scandalous,” Jo manages to whisper. She’s almost certain he’s joking. 

“Perfect,” Lucifer grins. “What do you think?” 

“You’re kidding, right?” Jo asks as he drops to one knee even as she’s trying to tug him back up. She catches sight of Gabriel and Castiel leaning around another pillar out of the corner of her eye and looks up to see the rest of Lucifer’s family slipping out to watch them as well. 

“You were worried about what to get me for graduation,” Lucifer announces and as Jo turns her head back to him she sees him holding a ring. “All I really want is you, Joanna.”

She lunges at him so hard the force of it knocks them out from under the cover for the building and out into the rain. From his smile as she kisses him Jo can tell he doesn’t really mind.


	5. Kiss 5: Sweet Ride

Title: Kiss 5  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Andy/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 545  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Sweet Ride. 

Kiss 5

It’s a van. There’s nothing much special about it. 

A huge, gas guzzling kind of vehicle that makes everyone in the five mile radius glare at him for driving around in because he’s damaging the environment or some shit like that. 

He gets it, really he does. 

Hell, Andy would sell the damn thing for an itty-bitty car if it weren’t for the one huge benefit that coming with a van like this brings. 

Privacy. 

And trust me, when you’ve got your eyes on one of the sons of the most religious guys in the whole damn town, privacy is a hot commodity. Especially, when you’re in high school. They can’t go to Gabriel’s house, the whole atmosphere is oppressive. You can’t cough in the house with out feeling like God himself is leaning over your shoulder to make sure you covered your mouth. 

Andy’s house isn’t really an option either, his mom’s kind of nuts. Home isn’t really a concept he puts a lot of faith into. So yeah, his van’s out dated, and yeah it sucks up enough gas and enough of his paycheck to make him think about giving it all up, but when he’s parked out here at night with just Gabriel and the stars it reminds him that it’s all worth it. 

One day he’s going to use this van to drive them both the hell out of this place. 

“What time do you have to be home?” Andy asks as Gabriel chugs down another soda and leans back against the side of the van. 

“They’re at church tonight,” Gabriel shrugs. “Anna said she’d leave the back door unlocked. I can come in whenever.”

“Cool,” Andy whispers as he turns his drink around in his hands. He had a plan tonight, everything spaced on in his head with perfect timing. All he has to do is reach out and kiss him. He’s almost one hundred percent sure Gabriel won’t mind.

Almost. 

It’s enough to make him sigh as he raises his drink back to his lips. He looks out over the football field they’re parked next to and turns the idea around in his head one or two more times. 

How do you know for sure when someone wants you back? How do you not burn your whole world down around your ears trying to scratch off a little more than what your life has given you. 

What if you can’t stop wanting more even if you can’t have it?

“You’re brain’s going leak out your ears if you don’t stop thinking so hard,” Gabriel teases. Then he’s taking Andy’s drink and setting both their soda out of the way. 

“What are you doing?” Andy asks. 

“Kicking you into second gear,” Gabriel huffs as he leans in closer. 

It’s a little bumpy; they have a lot going on between the two of them. But Gabriel settles against him after a moment. His lips are dry, smooth, perfect, and Andy’s always been good at hanging on.


	6. Kiss 6: Sun Shower

Title: Kiss 6  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 571  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Sun Shower. 

Kiss 6

It’s not supposed to be raining. 

The sun’s still out. But Sam’s life has never exactly gone as expected. So he’s not all that surprised. They’re grabbing their stuff as fast as they can and heading for cover. Not that there’s a lot of cover at a kite show. 

So he manages to find himself wedged into one of those picnic area stands at the park with what feels like two hundred of his college classmates. Who would have possibly thought so many people needed extra credit for Science?

He’s hot, the sun’s still out even as the rain falls down. There’s no wind and it’s getting impossibly stuffy. He huffs out his annoyance and takes a second to appreciate that at least he’s a head taller than everyone else so he can breathe. 

Then something cold slides down the back of his arm and slips into his pocket. He’s shocked to discover it’s a bottle of water. 

He turns as much as he can but the sea of people crammed in here to get out of the downfall just won’t move. 

Then someone pinches his butt. That has Sam jerking around until he finds himself pressed chest to face with his roommate. 

“Gabriel!” Sam exclaims. “What are you doing here?”

“Being smothered by a herd of college cattle,” Gabriel snorts. “How’s the weather up there, Sam?”

Sam rolls his eyes; it’s an old joke between them. Gabriel’s….short and Sam’s…not. 

“It’s just as hot up here,” Sam comments. 

“Looks hotter from where I’m standing,” a girl to their left offers with a sly smile. 

Sam’s always shocked when people blurt crap like that out at him. He’s never sure what to say. Gabriel, on the other hand, doesn’t really have that issue. 

“Take all the padding out of your bra and that ought to help,” Gabriel snaps back. 

But then he turns to Sam with his face pinched off and his eyes angry. Okay, so Gabriel’s a little more ruffled than Sam thought. 

“Come on,” he says as he starts dragging Gabriel out from under the cover of the picnic area and away from the rest of the people. “Let’s get out of here.”

“It’s still raining,” Gabriel complains even as he hurries to keep up with the pace set by Sam’s longer limbs. 

“You’re not sweet enough to melt,” Sam teases. 

“Says you,” Gabriel huffs. 

They make it, drenched and slipping on the grass to the side of Sam’s car where Gabriel chuckles as Sam starts a desperate search for the keys he’s always loosing. He looks over at his roommate to snap at him for thinking it’s funny even though Gabriel’s always laughing at him for one thing or another. 

But Gabriel’s lit up from behind in sunlight, his hair sort of golden in the light and his eyes shining. He looks vulnerable, open, relaxed in a way that Sam hasn’t seen him in a long time. 

He’s bending down and pressing their mouths together before he thinks it through. Gabriel’s startled, gasping as Sam pulls away after nothing more than a peck. But then Gabriel holds up his keys with a smile.


	7. Kiss 7:  Irish Coffee

Title: Kiss 7  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Anna/Jo  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 504  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Irish Coffee. 

Kiss 7

“You’re doing it wrong,” Anna whispers to her as she throws the ingredients together. 

Jo’s kind of a mess, it’s her first shift. 

“What do you mean?” Jo whispers back just praying the manager doesn’t overhear them talking. 

“Too much Irish,” Anna explains, pointing at the booze. “Not enough coffee.”

“Oh,” Jo blurts and blushes because she feels like a total idiot. “Sorry, I’ve never worked a bar before.” 

“No big deal,” Anna grins. “You’ll learn. Besides, most of the customers aren’t going to complain that you gave them too much of the Irish part. I just know this guy and he’s kind of a dick.”

“Thanks,” Jo nods as she hands the drink over and turns to go back to the next order. Anna smiles at her and heads off to her tables. They don’t see much of each other for the rest of the night. 

That’s how it starts, sort of. They both somehow ending up getting to work a little early when they work together and then Ann sometimes stays late while Jo sweeps up the bar. 

They talk, get to know one another. It’s nice to have someone at work to hang out with. Jo’s usually pretty standoffish with new people, comes from traveling with her parents so much when she was younger. You never know who you can count on in a new town. 

Anna’s open, hysterical, and not one to be bullied by the manager or the customers. She stands up for Jo a few times when she could have stayed out of it and that makes the long nights more bearable. 

Their boss is such a fuck-up. 

“What are you doing after work tonight?” Anna asks her when she comes to pick up an order. 

“Same old, same old,” Jo grins. “Go home, fall into bed, wake up tomorrow and do it all over again. What about you?”

“I’m going home with you,” Anna announces as she loads the drinks onto her tray. “My brother’s having a party and I have to get out of the apartment for the night. They do all kinds of crazy shit when the boys get together.”

“Okay,” Jo shrugs. Whatever, Anna’s a friend. It’s not a big deal. 

Except that Jo likes Anna, really likes her. 

They get home late, last call turning into a free for all and then they had to wait for the EMS guys to carry one of their more frequent customers out. Jo slumps onto the couch and leans back closing her eyes until she feels Anna inside her personal space. When her eyes snap open her friend is right there, close enough to touch, and then she’s closer. 

Pressing in, opening up as Jo leans in to taste her.


	8. Kiss 8:  Blood and Chocolate

Title: Kiss 8  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Gabriel/Kali  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 527  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Blood and Chocolate. 

Kiss 8

He never hesitates to pick up a case in the ER when he thinks it might involve the night staff from the surgical team. Maybe it’s gross, maybe it’s crazy, but Gabriel doesn’t care. He’s a nurse and for the most part they don’t think like normal people. 

If they did they wouldn’t be able to do their jobs. 

That and there’s just something about watching her work that makes him crazy. She’s gorgeous, everyone knows that. Even elbow deep in some guy’s belly she’s cool and collected like blood is something she controls, bathes with in the morning. 

She once described it as the secret to life to one of the med students. That guy thought she was nuts. But Gabriel sort of gets it. Blood is complicated, textured, individual. 

It’s a lot like chocolate. 

Gabriel loves chocolate, it’s a little bit of an obsession and everyone who knows even the tiniest bit about him knows that. He keeps a stash in his locker that he hauls out for the rest of the team when things go particularly badly or less often, particularly well. It’s part of the job to be prepared either way. He’s surprised one night to find a tiny bag tied around the opening to his locker. For just a moment he contemplates that it might be a trick. 

Gabriel’s been known to play a few around the hospital and everyone is always promising to get him back one day. 

But nothing explodes when he tugs on the string so he figures he’s okay. 

It’s chocolate. The good stuff. Gabriel devours it before anyone else can find out he has any. The stuff is expensive and he wants it all for himself. 

Then he spends the rest of his shift trying to figure out who it could possibly be from. But no one’s talking. 

It goes on for days, candy bars taped to his locker door, little Hershey kisses sitting on top of his charts when he gets back to them. Sometimes when he gets his lunch there’s even a little bit slid onto his tray. 

He just can’t figure it out. 

“You look puzzled,” she says as she walks past him at the nurse’s station. 

“Kali,” Gabriel grins. “To what do I owe the pleasure of your presence?”

“I’ve been hoping to catch your attention,” she answers and there’s a smile there under the surface as she slides him a kiss across the desk. 

It’s Almond, Gabriel loves nuts. 

“Oh.” He manages as he dances his fingertips across the little flag of paper sticking out the top. “My attention…you have it. You always have.”

“Good to know,” Kali smiles. “Join me for dinner?” 

“I’d love too,” Gabriel grins as he watches her un-wrap the kiss he’s yet to pick up before holding it between her fingers as she presses it to his lips. 

It’s delicious.


	9. Kiss 9:  Awkward Shy or Both

Title: Kiss 9  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 568  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – awkward or shy or both. 

Kiss 9

This really shouldn’t be this hard. His palms shouldn’t be sweaty and his heart shouldn’t be pounding. 

He knows how to do this. It’s just a kiss. A simple, sweet, honest kiss to someone he cares a lot about. Dean’s kissed lots of people, male and female. Kissing his best friend shouldn’t make him want to throw up. 

But it does, a little bit. Cas is frozen against him like he doesn’t know what to do next and for all Dean knows he probably doesn’t. Cas has led a fairly sheltered life. Dean doesn’t want to scare him off by coming on too strong. But at this point if he waits any longer the whole scene is going to be even more weird than it already is. They’re half in and half out of the house. Cas is leaving to go on a trip and Dean is coming home from working the night shift. 

They’re just passing in the doorway really; he’s not sure why all these months of mutual attraction and talking about their feelings has led up to this being the time. 

It’s a pretty crappy time to be having a first kiss. But Cas sways just a little closer and Dean takes a deep breath before dipping his head over those few centimeters between them and goes in for the kill. 

Their noses bump, Cas jerks backwards like Dean’s done something offensive and by doing so throws them both off balance enough that they grab for each other for fear of toppling out into the street on their asses. 

They blink at one another before Dean laughs and cups the side of Cas’ face. He’s getting ready to give it another try when suddenly he has an armload of his friend and Cas is clanking their teeth together with the amount of force he goes after Dean’s mouth with. There’s some hair tugging as Dean tries to get him under control. It’s a little bit like one of those face huggers from Aliens.

Cas pulls away blushing and sucking his bottom lip between his teeth. It’s habit he has that has always driven Dean batty. So he doesn’t hesitate to slide his arms around Cas again and guide him forward more gently than last time. Cas settles against him in a rare moment of hugging that makes them both exhale slowly as the moment they’re caught up in finally gets less weird. Dean kisses his forehead, his cheeks, the tip of his nose, while Cas snorts and grins, clinging to Dean’s jacket. It’s Cas who finally leans up just enough to brush their lips together lightly, sweetly. 

That contact alone is enough to make him let out a noise of garbled happiness before he tilts his head just right and lets Dean take over. Suddenly, it’s not so weird at all. 

“Call me when you get there,” he whispers against Cas’ temple as they break the kiss and he goes to move away. Even though what he really means is ‘I love you.’

“I love you, too,” Cas rumbles before pinching his ass and slipping away.


	10. Kiss 10:  Summer Shower

Title: Kiss 10  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 685  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Summer Showers. 

Kiss 10

There’s only one bad thing about being a residential assistant in college. 

Well okay, there are a few bad things. You have to come back to school a week before everyone else. So if you enjoy your home life it’s kind of a drag. But Sam takes summer classes to avoid having to go home to his brother and his father. They fight all the time like a married couple who disagree over Sam’s educational choices. His brother supports him going to college. His father wanted him to learn a trade or go in the military. 

His family is such a mess. 

So Sam doesn’t mind the coming back a week early, he doesn’t mind the cafeteria food, or the not being able to really go out at night. He studies too much anyway. He doesn’t mind the endless meetings and trainings. Hell, he doesn’t even mind the heat in his un-air conditioned dorm. What he does mind is the fact that they don’t turn the hot water back on until all the kids come back to school so he either has to walk down to the gym a mile away to take a shower on the other side of campus and then sweat all the way back to his dorm, totally ruining the point, or he has to take a freezing cold shower. 

Sam hates being cold. 

It doesn’t help matters that Gabriel, the resident assistant from the floor above Sam doesn’t seem to be able to feel the difference. Gabriel’s up at five in the morning with his windows open directly above Sam’s room while he belts out show tunes at the top of his lungs in while the freezing cold water runs. 

Sam wakes up to it every day. It’s driving him nuts. 

So the Thursday before the students come back Sam gets woken up to Gabriel shrieking Amish Paradise at four thirty five in the morning. He tosses off the covers and stalks up the steps to Gabriel’s room in nothing but his boxers. 

He knocks but there’s no answer, Sam doubts Gabriel can even hear him. So he uses his master key to open Gabriel’s door and barge in. 

The shower water is still running and Gabriel’s still singing but as Sam throws open the bathroom door he’s assaulted by steam. 

Why the hell is it hot in this bathroom?

“You have hot water!” Sam accuses probably a little louder than he needs to. 

Gabriel jumps, slips and would have fallen in the shower if Sam hadn’t reached out to grab him at the last second. 

He does a quick look around why Gabriel gaps up at him. There’s some weird ass thing hanging from the ceiling and pipes everywhere. “What is that?”

“I’m an engineering major,” Gabriel explains softly. “I ridged it up over the summer. It heats the water enough for me take a shower so long as it’s before everyone else gets up.”

“What do I have to do to get in on this?” Sam asks immediately. This solves all his problems. 

“There’s only enough power for one shower a day,” Gabriel says as he slowly leans into Sam’s personal space, wet, and oh yeah, naked. “Want to join me?”

Gabriel’s…..interesting. Sam’s noticed him before; loud and irritating and apparently very, very smart. 

Sam likes smart. 

He’s shoving Gabriel further back in the shower and stepping under the spray a second later; dragging off his now soaked boxers and gathering the smaller man close to his chest before lifting him up and pinning him against the still cool tile of the shower wall. Gabriel’s mouth opens in a gasp at the move. Sam takes advantage of it and slides his tongue inside. It’s wet, dirty, oh so good. 

They still shower together even after the hot water gets turned back on.


	11. kiss 11: Heat of Battle

Title: Kiss 11  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Uriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 586  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Heat of Battle. 

Kiss 11

It’s a game of strategy really. 

Dean’s always been good at that kind of thing. Say what you will about the Winchesters, stupidity isn’t really one of their traits. 

Now, Dean can play dumb with the best of them. He does it all time; gear-head, grease monkey, car freak, are all names he answers to on a regular basis. Everyone thinks Sam is the smart one, they over look Dean in that capacity, which is why it’s so fun to prove them all wrong. 

He’s only going to get one chance at it this year. He’s about to graduate and this is his third high school in just as many years. So no one here knows him, no one sees anything more than him being the son of the new football coach. 

Hell, he wouldn’t even have signed up for it if it hadn’t been for Uriel Novak mocking him for even reading the poster. 

Uriel’s a dick of the first kind. Well groomed, snotty, little shit that thinks everyone is beneath him. He pissed Dean off enough that day to have him decide to flush his carefully sculpted image of bad ass down the toilet and sign up for the chess competition. 

Like he said; a game of strategy. It’s totally not just a geek thing. 

So Dean blows through the first rounds with no problem. It’s hardly even a challenge. He’s been duking it out in chess with his Uncle Bobby and Aunt Ellen his whole life and he knows every trick in the book. High school students, even high class ones aren’t really in his league. 

By semi-finals Uriel’s looking a little nervous, but Dean and he are operating in different circles and it’s clear at this point that if Dean wants to kick his ass he’s actually going to have to go all the way to the end even if he doesn’t give a shit about winning. 

“Prepare for your defeat,” Uriel growls at him when they sit down to face each other as part of the final match.

Dean grins, “Aww baby,” he coos in return. “Don’t be like this. We can work it out.” 

Uriel looks like he’s going to choke on his tongue. 

It takes a long time to figure out how to win. Dean will give the guy that much, he’s a good competitor and knows the game. But he’s stiff, rigid. Uriel doesn’t take the time to look at his opponent and try to get into the other persons head. It makes him weak, beatable. 

And that’s just what Dean does. 

“Checkmate,” he comments as he tips the chess piece over before grabbing it off the board. The crowd is momentarily silent and it’s not until then that Dean remembers Uriel’s never lost a chess meet before. The crowd goes crazy as Dean gets to his feet. Uriel sits, stunned and silent, as he stares at the chess board in front of him. Dean dips down and whispers, “Watch who you pick on sweet-cheeks. It might come back and bite you in the ass.” 

Then he presses a quick, humiliating kiss on the top of Uriel’s balled head and leaves him seething there as he takes Sam out for pizza.


	12. Kiss 12: Sweet Cherry Pie

Title: Kiss 12  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 769  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Sweet Cherry Pie. 

Kiss 12

Castiel looks depressed. 

Well, more depressed than normal. Dean’s been working for the guy for a few months now. Well, not actually for him. The university pays Dean, not Castiel himself. But his job, though advertised as a graduate assistant-ship in research, is really just to keep Castiel Novak from killing people. 

The guy is the most uptight librarian Dean has ever seen. As a restorer of historical manuscripts for the university, Castiel spends all of his days bent over old, abused books urging them back to health with no small amount of intensity and care. 

That’s what makes Dean think everyone else just has the wrong idea about the guy. Anyone who can pour so much love into a book has to be able to love another person at least just as well. 

Dean thinks maybe people just don’t give Castiel the chance. He knows how that feels. He’s getting his degree a little later than most people. Hell, ten years later honestly, but he and Lisa had Ben when he was twenty-one and Dean was never going to not support his kid. So even though they didn’t work out as a family Dean pays his child support plus some and he gets to spend almost every other weekend with Ben. 

He had to put off going to college for a while but the trade off was spectacular. Being a dad is awesome. 

It makes him wonder if Castiel has any family. 

“You don’t have to stay,” Castiel speaks up as if he’s heard Dean wondering about him as he moves around putting books in order around the back office of the library that also functions as a storage area. “It’s Friday night, surely you have something you would rather be doing. I’ll be fine here on my own.” 

“If you haven’t noticed,” Dean chuckles. “I’m not twenty-one and ready to rush off to the frat party. I’ve got work to finish up. I don’t mind the extra hours.”

“You’re not picking up your son tonight?” Castiel asks. Dean startles a little; he didn’t even know Castiel knew he had a kid. 

“No,” Dean shrugs. “His mom’s taking him to her family reunion.”

“Oh,” Castiel nods and there’s a hesitation before he turns back to the book in front of him, like he wants to say more, continue the conversation, but he doesn’t know how. 

“Do you like pie?” Dean offers. Castiel doesn’t really participate in the office get togethers, but Dean does and he knows there’s pie in the kitchen. 

“I suppose,” Castiel mumbles. 

It’s as close to an actual agreement Dean thinks he’s going to get so he heads to the kitchen and returns a few minutes later with half a cherry pie that he sets down on Castiel’s desk before handing the other man a fork. 

“It’s cherry,” Dean says encouragingly. “Homemade. Try it.”

He’s pleasantly surprised when Castiel digs in. There's just a quarter of the pie left when Dean works up the nerve to ask, “Are you okay?”

Castiel looks confused by the question but he answers, “No, my brother is….ill. I’m worried for him.”

Dean thinks about Sam and Sam possibly being sick in the way Castiel makes his brother sound, like maybe he’s dying. It sends a shiver up Dean’s spine. He reaches out and runs his hand up Castiel’s arm before he thinks about it as he whispers “I’m sorry.”

“Thank you,” Castiel breathes out, when he looks up his eyes are glassy with what Dean thinks are probably unshed tears. 

They finish the pie in silence before locking up for the night and heading to the parking lot. As they reach Castiel’s car Dean grabs his arm and blurts, “Look, if you ever need anything, someone to talk to or…whatever…”

He trails off as Castiel turns too blue eyes toward him, stepping closer and claiming Dean’s mouth in a kiss that frankly makes his knees go a little weak. 

He tastes like sadness, coated with the sweet tang of cherries. 

Castiel snaps back just as quickly, looking flustered and horrified as he touches his mouth with shaking fingers before mumbling, “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” 

He’s in his car and driving away so fast Dean doesn’t get a chance to tell him he doesn’t really mind. 

*****

He should _not_ have done that. 

Castiel’s made a terrible mistake tonight and he may pay for it dearly. Dean Winchester is a student, and working for the college partially under Castiel’s employment. Kissing him was a horrible abuse of power and it should never have happened.

He’s better than that, has more respect for his position than that. 

But he’s been so run down caring for and worrying about Gabriel, that the simple human kindness of offering him something to eat had warmed Castiel inside his chest and made him forget for a moment the facts of their situation. 

He likes Dean.

Gabriel teases him about his somewhat grade-schoolesque crush on Dean Winchester, but there’s something about the other man that makes Castiel notice him. Dean has warmth about him, something that draws people toward him like moths to a flame. Castiel has never personally had such a power; most people find him cold or distant, off-putting. 

But then Dean had included him, eaten with him, listened to Castiel and offered him comfort. It had been genuine, kind, wonderful…until Castiel had to go and ruin it by molesting him in the parking lot. 

How is he ever going to make it through seeing Dean again next week?

“Gabriel,” he announces as he comes through the door of their tiny house. “I’m home.”

The lack of an answer indicates what kind of night Gabriel is likely having. 

He finds his brother in bed; Gabriel is awake, possibly he has been reading judging by the Kindle sitting to his side, but for now he’s got his head back against the propped up pillows on his bed and is swallowing repeatedly. 

“Bad night?” Castiel questions as he slides into the room and takes up his seat in the chair next to Gabriel’s bedside. 

“Trying not to puke,” Gabriel answers with a weak smile. 

“The medication,” Castiel nods. 

“Why is the treatment worse than the dying?” Gabriel asks. Castiel flinches, his heart clenches in his chest and he wants to scream at his brother to shut up. But the fact remains, Gabriel is very ill; he may not be with Castiel much longer. 

Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia is a terrible disease and it’s not Gabriel’s first tangle with it. When he was much younger he had been diagnosed and treated successfully, but in the last few years he’s had a recurrence and this time the prognosis is much bleaker. 

“It’s funny,” Gabriel murmurs while he reaches out to brush his hand along where Castiel’s is clenched against the side of the chair, tugging at the material as he tries to get himself under control. “Lucifer called, he was teasing me about dying from a disease most people get in their childhood.”

“Lucifer can go to Hell!” Castiel snaps. 

“It’s supposed to make you smile,” Gabriel sighs. “You take this too seriously.”

“It’s your _life_ , Gabriel,” Castiel counters with a sad shake of his head. “How can I not take this seriously?”

Gabriel regards him for a long time, his lips pinched together as though he wants to reply in a manner he knows Castiel will not like. But then his brother shakes his head and leans back into his pillows, changing the topic with, “Tell me about your day.”

“I kissed Dean Winchester,” Castiel blurts. 

Why did he just say that?

Gabriel blinks, slowly. Then erupts into a deep-chested chuckle and waves his hand around in a motion for Castiel to tell him more. 

“It’s not something to laugh at, Gabriel,” Castiel huffs. “I’ve made a terrible error and I have no idea how to fix this.”

“Why do you want to?” Gabriel asks and then rolls his eyes as Castiel looks at him as though he’s stupid. “I mean, you kissed him, you aren’t beat the hell up so I assume he must not have minded too much. Why do you need to fix something that’s not broken? You’re obsessed with him, Cassie. You talk about him all the time. If you have a chance at building something with this guy you should go for it. I don’t want you to be alone.” 

“I’m not alone,” Castiel argues. “I have you.”

“For now,” Gabriel counters. 

Castiel doesn’t bother to restart their argument. But that night, as he holds a pillow to his chest while he finally allows the tears he feels like he’s always holding back leak out of his eyes, he wonders how it might feel if Dean were there to hold him. 

*****

Dean’s not scheduled back in the Library until Tuesday, and it’s the longest weekend of his life without Ben to distract him and most of his coursework caught up on. Dean’s a good student; starting school later in life will do that for you. He wants to do well, get his degree, maybe think about a PhD when it’s all said and done. His dad would crap a brick if he could see Dean now. John Winchester’s little grease monkey thinking about being a doctor. 

But, Dean has to get through his next shift at work first. 

He’s thought about what he plans to say to Castiel all weekend and most of Monday. The ideas have gone from grand gestures including flowers and more pie, narrowing to flirting and asking the other man out on a real date, down to just trying to not get fired. 

Castiel’s not _really_ his boss, but the lines are kind of fuzzy sometimes, being that Dean has historically been the only graduate assistant that hasn’t run from Castiel Novak screaming after fifteen minutes. 

So plan or no plan, Dean’s going to have to suck it up today and work with the guy, even if he spends half the damn day trying not to think about how good it felt to kiss him, how much he wants to do it again. 

And again…

And again.

Today is totally going to suck. 

Castiel’s already hard at work in the stacks when Dean comes into the library. It’s nothing new; Castiel’s always been to work early. He gives Dean a nod as he walks by and Dean shakes off shivers running down his back at the simple acknowledgment of his existence. 

The morning passes pretty quickly, with Dean running books back and forth and Castiel carefully, painstakingly mending a manual from the 1800’s. There are a few exchanges where Dean’s handing a tool or cleaning cloth to Castiel and their fingers brush against each other. Every single time, Dean feels sparks shoot up his arm and color flood his face. By the third time he’s starting to think Castiel might be doing it on purpose, as crazy as that seems. But when Dean’s eyes dart to his face, Castiel is watching him intently, his blue eyes focused in on Dean’s reactions like he’s studying the most impressive book he’s ever seen. 

“Have lunch with me,” Dean abruptly announces. 

Maybe his delivery could use some work because Castiel jerks back from him in surprise and shakes his head before gathering the book between them to his chest and darting away. 

“I’m such a _fucking idiot_ ,” Dean breathes into the stillness of the room before bending over and banging his head purposefully against the corner of the table. 

He makes some kind of strangled moan of horror when he thinks about it; the day had been going well, the awkward tension between them was easing and he might have made it through the rest of the week employed if he had just been able to keep his mouth shut. 

Dean’s still slumped over the table when Castiel says, “I have to take my brother to the doctor over lunch today. It means I’ll be working later tonight. I was wondering if you had plans or if perhaps you might be open to remaining behind with me again?”

Dean rolls his head to the side to peer at Castiel. He must have some kind of weird look on his face because the mask Castiel wears slips a little bit and a warm smile breaks out over the man’s features. 

“You’re utterly adorable,” Castiel rumbles, then flushes and ducks his head as though he’s embarrassed by the admission. 

Dean shoves himself back up into a standing position before crossing the room quickly and pressing his mouth to Castiel’s. It’s too forward, completely unprofessional, and everything he dreamed it would be all weekend long. 

Castiel groans raggedly before opening his lips and just freaking melting into his arms. Dean wants to spend the rest of his life doing this. It’s unbelievably perfect. Castiel is kissing him like he’s desperate, like it’s been forever since someone cared enough to touch him at all much less like this. Their tongues tangle as Dean slides his palm along Castiel’s side, under his jacket but over his button up shirt. He’s so warm. 

Castiel makes a whimpering noise and Dean pulls back from the kiss enough to see him reach up a shaky hand to wipe at his eyes. 

Tears. Castiel is crying. 

“I’m not that bad of a kisser, am I?” Dean whispers and he’s relieved when the man breaks out into a strangled sounding snort of laughter. 

“I’m so sorry,” Castiel huffs. “I’m not like this usually. I’m just very tired. My brother…and I’m…I don’t know.” 

He finishes with a frustrated sounding sigh and Dean gathers him back against his chest before Castiel can pull away. Dean’s rucks up the back of Castiel’s dress shirt and presses his hand to the bare skin he finds beneath it. Castiel stiffens against him, his eyes boring into Dean’s as if he’s looking for some kind of sign. But then he softens, bends into the curve of Dean’s frame and presses his face into the bare skin of Dean’s neck before inhaling deeply. 

“It’s okay,” Dean whispers next to Castiel’s ear. “You need this. Someone to take care of _you_ for a while. I can do that.” 

Dean doesn’t know the specifics of what’s going on with Castiel’s brother, but he knows it’s bad and he remembers back when his mother died and his father was holding down two jobs so they could keep the house. Remembers when he was basically raising Sam on his own and how much he wanted someone to take care of him for just a second, how touch starved he was even though he couldn’t identify the feeling as a kid. 

Castiel shivers against him, but instead of pulling away he clings just a little tighter. Dean kisses his cheek. It’s too much, too fast, too soon. But it feels right, feels like Dean’s right where he’s supposed to be. 

And Dean’s always been good at listening to his gut. 

*****

“My brother has Leukemia,” Castiel blurts over the fast food dinner Dean ran out to grab them when the rest of the staff left out for the night. They’re sitting on top of one of the big research tables in the center of the library as they eat. 

It’s breaking a number of rules, but Dean doesn’t care and it turns out Castiel’s got a well hidden wild side. 

Dean bites back the ‘I’m sorry,’ that immediately fills his mouth. He remembers when his mother had just died and people would say that to him. It always sounded hollow, felt false. It made him want to scream. He settles for, “Can I help?” instead. 

Castiel cocks his head to one side before huffing and shaking his head. “You must stop being so wonderful…it’s far too early for me to embarrass myself by blurting out I think I’m falling for you.” 

Dean laughs, so loudly it echoes around the library. When he turns back to Castiel with a smile the other man is grinning at him, his cheeks stained pink. It’s a good look for him. 

Dean plucks at the hem of his pants as he offers, “Maybe the feeling’s mutual.” 

Castiel hums with what Dean thinks sounds like pleasure before sliding off the table and gathering up their trash to throw away. Dean watches him walk with this air of confidence he’s always admired from Castiel. The man might be odd, but his presence is commanding. There’s something about him that holds Dean’s attention…and it’s not just the crazy way he kisses. 

“Come,” Castiel commands him in a way that sounds more like a gentle request than an order. He holds out his hand to help drag Dean off the table. Once Dean has his feet on the floor he doesn’t let go, instead he laces their fingers together loosely and tugs Dean toward the door. “Let’s get out of here.” 

They pass the janitor on the way out the door and Castiel surprises Dean by greeting the older man by name with a friendly wave. “Hello, Bobby!” 

The older man waves back with a grin and Castiel is tugging Dean out the front door with a pleasant “Goodnight, Rufus,” given to the night shift security guard. 

“You know everyone by name?” Dean asks as they stroll toward the parking lot. 

“Of course,” Castiel seems baffled by his question. “I’ve always been good at observing people. I make it a point to know those whom I work with, my neighbors, I also like to know some of what’s important to them…like your son, your ex-wife and her new husband, your younger brother of whom you speak so fondly.”

“Why?” Dean questions as he rubs his thumb along the back of Castiel’s hand gently, feeling his skin, getting to know the strength of his grip, the warmth underneath. 

Dean was pretty much raised to mind his own damn business.

“Because what’s important to those I care about is also important to me,” Castiel answers evenly. “In the cases of our student workers I keep track of personal information should something happen to them. It’s not unheard of for assistants to not show up consistently, but sometimes it’s about something more serious. I once had one of our library student employees go out with friends on a Thursday night and not report for work on Friday. She had recently moved and the registrars office had the wrong address of record. If it had not been for my brother and I helping her elderly parents move her belongings we wouldn’t have known where to send the police.”

“Was she alright?” Dean can’t help himself from asking. His father had always accused him of being too nosy. 

“She was injured,” Castiel answers with a frown and a far away look. “A domestic dispute with her boyfriend. It was…unpleasant. There was a confrontation, and my brother, Gabriel, beat that boy within an inch of his life.” 

“I like your brother already,” Dean snorts. 

“I do think you two will get along,” Castiel replies with a wry smile. 

“Gabriel’s sick?” Dean asks as they reach the same spot in the parking lot they were at the week before when Castiel kissed him and changed everything. 

Castiel nods. “He’s living with me right now. He had to stop working when he got too sick.”

Dean squeezes his hand and Castiel looks up at him with a tired smile. “Is our first date over?” Dean asks with a grin as he hopes to lighten the mood. 

Castiel chuckles, reaching up with his hand to run it through his forever tousled hair. “If eating food in the library and walking to the parking lot together counts as a date then I’m fairly certain this is our second.”

“Only if you kiss me again,” Dean says as he tugs Castiel closer. Just before their lips meet he adds, “Just don’t run away before I can tell you how much I enjoy you this time.” 

He’s still smiling when Castiel captures his mouth, nipping at his bottom lip so Dean gasps and opens up for him to slide his tongue inside. Jesus, it’s so hot he swears his toes are going to curl. 

He’s a little dizzy when Castiel backs away, rough, maybe glue covered, fingers stroking along the side of Dean’s cheek as he goes. Their hands are still connected as Castiel steps slowly away, heading for his car. 

Dean’s not sure he’s ready for him to go. 

“So next time it’s our third date?” Dean asks, a little shocked at how rough his voice sounds. 

“If you wish,” Castiel answers. 

“You know what happens on the third date, right?” Dean presses, hoping for another chance at seeing Castiel laugh before they part company. 

“We actually go somewhere?” Castiel offers with a raise of his eyebrows. 

“Well, that,” Dean snorts, “and the third date is when you’re supposed to put out.” 

“Fascinating,” Castiel murmurs as he turns to walk away. Their fingers brush at the last moment before slipping apart. 

“Is that a no?” Dean asks. 

Castiel’s smile is wicked. “No, but it’s not a yes either.”

Dean watches him drive away and wonders if the man is trying to kill him. 

*****

“Fuck, Cas,” Dean pants as his grip tightens in Castiel’s hair. “ _fuuuuck…_ ”

He suspects Dean doesn’t really expect a verbal response, what with Castiel being busy learning the taste and feel of his dick as Dean’s hips push it farther into the back of Castiel’s open, willing mouth. 

But he moans his agreement at the sentiment just the same, in case Dean is still with it enough to wonder if he is enjoying himself. 

And he is…even if this was _not_ the plan for their third date. 

Castiel had planned a romantic dinner for two at one of the nicer restaurants in town. They had reservations, and afterward…well he was sort of leaving that up to Dean.

But last night Gabriel had a reaction to one of new medications and Castiel had to rush him to the emergency room. He had spent the night huddled at his brother’s bedside watching him struggle to breathe through the anaphylaxis before they finally decided to tube him. 

His continued life is a victory for Castiel; he’s not ready yet to lose his brother. 

Gabriel will be very angry when he wakes. Life can be cruel, and it seems death also. His brother says he’s ready to die and Castiel knows Gabriel is suffering. 

But he can’t let go…not yet…he’s not ready. 

What had started as a kiss hello when Dean arrived to pick Castiel up for the evening turned into Castiel slamming the door behind him and yanking off Dean’s clothing as he pressed him back into the wall and dropped to his knees. 

It’s too soon for this.

It might ruin everything they have the potential of being. 

But Castiel wants to _feel_ tonight. He welcomes Dean’s hand tugging at his hair as the man holds his head in place. He groans in appreciation at the jerks of Dean’s hips that force his dick in further until he’s hitting the back of Castiel’s throat. He doesn’t mind gagging a little, wants to feel it, wants it to be sore in the morning so he has something to cling to other than death. 

But then Dean is tugging his head away and Castiel claws at his legs and mewls out his disapproval. He wants more. 

“Not like this,” Dean gasps out in a voice sounding like it’s been drug behind a car. “I’ll do this, I’ll give you what you need, but not like this. Take me to your room.”

He leads Dean down the hallway on shaky legs, stripping him with fingers so numb he struggles with the buttons on the shirt. But then Dean is taking over with warm kisses and tender touches that Castiel fears he can’t bear. They’re too intimate, feel too much like being loved when somewhere inside he thinks he should be punished. 

Punished for being the healthy one, for not being able to let Gabriel go, for not being able to heal him, for not being the one that’s dying even though it feels like part of his soul dies every day. 

Dean gives him a massage instead of just fucking into his body. Castiel is startled by it at first but as he works the muscles loose in Castiel’s shoulders and neck he finds himself melting into the touches, onto the bed. 

“Someone needs to take care of you,” Dean whispers into the dim bedroom. “Will you let me, Cas? Will you promise me there’s more to us than this?”

He’s nodding before he thinks it all through. But it sounds so sweet.

Dean touches every part of him, trails kisses and licks areas of him that no one has ever put their mouth to before, the bottom of his feet, the backs of his knees, the curve of his hips, the cleft of his ass while Castiel moans, pants, and twists beneath him. 

He makes Castiel come the first time just using his fingers. When he comes back to himself Dean still has them inside him, slowly rubbing over something that sends sparks up Castiel’s spine to his brain until Castiel is hard a second time and pleading Dean to take him. 

When he does it’s slow, careful. Nothing like the rough roll in the sheets Castiel had thought he needed. 

After Dean comes, and Castiel a second time, Dean cleans them both up and slides into bed before wrapping himself around Castiel’s body and holding him close. 

He finds himself pouring it all out to Dean. He tells him of the loss of their parents, of how Gabriel has always been the closest to his heart, of foster care and boarding homes and never having enough to eat or feeling loved by anyone but his brother. He tells Dean of how Gabriel survived his first fight with the disease when he was very young and how Gabriel had hidden his illness from Castiel until it was almost too late this time. 

He sobs out his fear, his shame at not being able to do more or let go faster. 

And finally the truth of it, that he’s never allowed himself to say aloud to anyone. Gabriel needs a bone marrow transplant to have a chance at surviving, and none of the donors listed are a match. 

He falls asleep shaken and emotionally exhausted. 

Dean holds him all night long. 

*****

It turns out that hiding shit from Cas is fucking hard. 

The guy never misses anything. 

But in the months since they had gotten together Dean’s been working on a plan that if it all goes well will greatly improve Castiel’s outlook on life. 

Gabriel is…pretty awesome. Dean can admit that to himself in private. The sick little guy is bossy, spunky, and sometimes foul. Dean enjoys him more every time they hook up and nothing had been funnier than introducing Gabriel to Sam when he came to visit. 

Sam had poured over Gabriel with all of his bleeding heart stupidity until the smaller guy had snarled, “Easy Sasquatch! I’m not dead yet and killing me with kindness doesn’t work. Trust me Cassie has tried it.” 

Sam had gone back home still laughing at some of his antics and promising to visit soon. 

But it wasn’t even a week later that Sam was emailing him and calling him about coming up with a plan. 

Dean had discussed it with Gabriel and the three of them had decided not to include Castiel for fear of it coming to nothing. 

They organize, plan, and search for a donor. 

Dean had been a little put out when he wasn’t a match. Gabriel had laughed in his face and told him to go drown his hero complex out back in the river. 

Sam wasn’t either so the search expanded. By the time they were gearing up for the end of the spring semester Sam had gotten every single person he knew in California tested and Dean had worked his way through their home town and the college. 

It turns out it’s easy to get someone to agree to become a bone marrow donor when the guy that’s sick is the hot librarian’s brother. 

It didn’t hurt that Castiel’s friendly demeanor with the janitors and security staff had made them very protective of him. 

Those rough kinds of guys took care of their own. 

In the end hundreds of people from all over the country had been tested and joined the registry, not just for Gabriel but for anyone who was potentially in need. 

Dean held his breath, kept his mouth shut and waited for a potential match. 

They just needed one person to give Gabriel a chance. Just one. 

They didn’t find one. 

On a Saturday afternoon he piles Castiel into Gabriel’s room and they both confesses to the whole story. They tell him everything about what has been going on behind his back and waits as Castiel works his way through shock, into anger, a little betrayal, and finally peace. 

There are tears shed and hugs exchanged before Castiel finally asks them, “Well? Did you find someone?”

Dean takes one of his hands and holds it tightly while Gabriel takes the other. He leans in close and shakes his head before whispering, “No.” 

Castiel’s body gives this all over shudder and Dean flinches at the tears that well up in his eyes, threatening to spill over before Gabriel tugs hard on Castiel’s other arm and smiles as bright as the sun when they turn to look at him. 

Castiel had warned him Gabriel was a joker, but Dean hadn’t realized how much until today. 

“They didn’t find one,” Gabriel says grinning. “They found two.” 

Castiel turns wide yes back to Dean who shrugs and nods. 

He’s always thought it was a good idea to have a spare.


	13. Kiss 13: First Time

Title: Kiss 13  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Lucifer  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 574  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – First Time. 

Kiss 13

Lucifer lips are dry, his breath smells like mint and Sam figures he’s probably been chewing gum. It’s after lunch and Sam has a distant thought that he wishes he had thought of gum. 

But it’s not like he planned this. 

Who plans their first kiss anyway?

Especially when you end up making out with a guy that you would have sworn a week ago you hated. 

It’s been a long week. 

Sam shifts, hesitant and unsure of his welcome before cupping the side of Lucifer’s face with his hand that is probably freezing, after all he’s been sitting here with ice on it for ten minutes now. 

Something about the action seems to light Lucifer up inside and that dry press of his mouth blossoms into warm wetness sliding across Sam’s lower lip. He gasps in surprise. That’s Lucifer’s tongue, on his mouth, sliding into his mouth while Sam’s still trying to decide if he likes this. If maybe he wants more of this. 

Sam goes to grip Lucifer’s hair and hold him steady, maybe pull him away, he’s honestly not sure. But when he tightens his fingers pain drives up his arm to his shoulder and he makes a tiny noise of discomfort that’s enough to have Lucifer pulling back from him anyway. 

This swirl of something in his chest might possibly be regret. 

But Lucifer doesn’t go far; he just cups Sam’s hand gently in his own and starts pressing tender kisses along his knuckles and across the backs of his fingers before turning his hand over and almost nuzzling Sam’s palm.   
And yeah, that’s really nice. 

It’s easy to forget he’s not supposed to like this guy; easy to pretend for a minute that Lucifer isn’t playing for the other team. But really, Sam broke his hand on some guys face for calling him a faggot. So maybe they aren’t so far apart right now in terms of goals. 

This isn’t a game. This is way bigger than that. 

It’s Sam who leans forward this time; he surprises himself by doing it as much as he can tell Lucifer isn’t expecting it either. There’s something dark and pain-filled in Lucifer’s eyes that Sam thinks maybe he’s seen in his own gaze in the mirror. 

This time Sam kisses him as Lucifer cradles his damaged hand between them like Sam’s something precious, something to be looked after. 

It feels good. 

They break apart flushed and grinning as they both look at their shoes. 

“So…” Lucifer swallows as he looks away. “Thanks for standing up for me.”

Sam’s not sure what to say so he kisses him again, squirming closer, trying to hold onto the moment before it slips away and they go back to being who they have to be. 

Lucifer huffs a breathy laugh out as Sam eases away the second time. 

“I’m sorry,” Sam whispers. “I’ve never kissed anyone before.”

That comment gains him Lucifer’s full attention. He stares at Sam for a long time, thumb still gently rubbing the inside of Sam throbbing palm. “It’s okay,” Lucifer finally whispers back. “It’s the first time anyone’s ever defended me. So…lots of firsts today.”


	14. Kiss 14:  Flying (Follow up to Date 32)

Title: Kiss 14  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Gabriel/Castiel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 517  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Flying. Follow up to Date 32.

Kiss 14

“So…” Gabriel mumbles as he shuts the door of the apartment behind them. He presses himself back against it while he tries to act as though he’s not thinking of making a run for it. “This is it.”

Castiel looks around the small living area with that same solemn expression he had been wearing the day of the funeral. Gabriel’s starting to think his brother looks depressed all of the time. “It’s very nice.”

“You’re full of shit,” Gabriel accuses as he pulls himself away from the door. “And a liar.” 

“I find myself in a position where I am suddenly willing to lie about a number of things,” Castiel shrugs. “Lying about the state of your apartment isn’t really on my list.”

He’s just so level about it. It makes Gabriel nuts. Castiel never raises his voice or gets upset, no matter how many times they’ve argued about this crazy idea he had at their father’s funeral. 

‘Take me with you,’ he had asked. ‘No one will ever need to know we’re brothers.’

Why had Gabriel agreed to this?

It’s wrong, it’s sick; it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him in whole damned life. 

He doesn’t have it in him to refuse. This is what that super secret part of him has always wanted and to find that Castiel wants it too…that they wasted so much time….it makes his chest hurt. 

But there are dreams and then there is reality. Gabriel’s never really been a dreamer. 

“It’s not too late,” Gabriel whispers as Castiel slowly, methodically crosses the space separating them. “I can still take you home. Or you can stay even. We just forget this whole stupid plan of ours and tell everyone we’re related.”

“We’re not,” Castiel says sternly. “Not anymore.”

“Yes,” Gabriel argues desperately as he backs up until he runs into the wall next to the refrigerator. “We are Cas, we really are.”

“Not here,” Castiel explains as he presses himself up into Gabriel’s personal space and against his body. “I think the phrase is ‘What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.’ Am I right?”

And yeah, he is, but that is so totally not the point. 

But then Castiel has his hand in Gabriel’s hair and he’s leaning in so close his face is getting blurry before Gabriel’s brain helpfully supplies that this is it, this is the moment where it goes from stupid, crazy idea into reality as Castiel kisses him. 

And kisses him, and kisses him, until Gabriel’s forgotten everything about why they can’t do this and is slumped, tingling and utterly in love against him while he kisses back. 

“You make me feel,” Castiel whispers into his neck as they break apart. Gabriel smoothes a hand through his hair and whispers back “You make me fly.”


	15. Kiss 15: School Play

Title: Kiss 15  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Gabriel/Sam  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 512  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – School Play

Kiss 15

Gabriel Novak is in the drama club, he’s loud and passionate, wild and extravagant. 

Popular.

Sam works for the school newspaper. He’s only lived in town for about three months and if he’s lucky he’ll make it four more before their dad yanks them up to move to the next town. 

He and Gabriel met when Sam was doing an article for the paper about the upcoming school play where Gabriel has the lead role. He sort of rolled all over Sam’s questions like a steam roller before asking a hundred of his own and then telling Sam to think of things more shocking to ask because they would be more interesting. 

Sam’s quiet, it makes it easier to blend in that way. But he’s not shy or timid. Gabriel misread him. So when Sam had asked “What’s your favorite sexual position?” Gabriel had looked a little surprised. 

Then he had swallowed and answered, “I like giving head.” 

Yeah, Sam hadn’t really expected that. He’s not sure what possessed him to lean forward as he was leaving and whisper, “I might have to take you up on that sometime.” 

He’s not promiscuous. His brother’s caught enough weird STD’s for Sam to be scared of sleeping around. But there’s something about Gabriel that Sam likes. 

He wants Gabriel to like him too. 

“How’s the weather up there?” Gabriel asks as he drops down next to Sam in the tiny closet used as the newsroom. 

“Ha, ha,” Sam mumbles. “Are you slumming today? Don’t you have rehearsal or something?”

“We got out early,” Gabriel answers as he leans over Sam’s shoulder. “I came to see if you needed a ride.” 

“I’m not going to be done for a little bit,” Sam says as he types. “You don’t have to wait if you don’t want to. I can walk.”

“Sam,” Gabriel says. Sam keeps typing. 

“Sam,” Gabriel says a little louder. 

“Sam!” Gabriel announces. “I’m trying to kiss you but you’re not making it any easier by refusing to hit save.”

That makes Sam pause for a second. “You want to what?”

“Kiss you,” Gabriel says so slowly Sam wonders for a moment if he’s going to start spelling out the words. “I want to kiss you.”

Sam hits save and gives Gabriel his full attention. After all, it’s not everyday the newsboy gets to play the romantic interest of the leading man. Sam’s taking every opportunity he can get. 

Four and half months later he’s throwing his book bag in the back of the car and sliding into the backseat with his eyes red and his arms crossed tight over his chest. 

The taste of Gabriel’s lips and tears still on his tongue. 

Sam’s left a lot of places in his lifetime. This was his first kiss goodbye.


	16. Kiss 16: Camp Fire (Follow Up to Date 11)

Title: Kiss 16  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 560  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Camp Fire continued from Date 11.

Kiss 16

They’ve gone out a few times now. 

Dean’s enjoying this summer more than he ever thought he would. Cas is interesting, deep, and hard to figure out most of the time, but he brightens up whenever Dean comes around. It’s a little bit like he carries the weight of the world on his shoulders and having someone to share the burden with makes it bearable.

Cas is kind of a control freak. He worries about the kids all the time and where Dean has a no blood, no problem policy Cas chases around behind them like every little scrape and bruise is a blotch on his perfectly pristine track record. 

Dean’s record is nothing but blotches honestly, that’s how he ended up here.

It’s funny how life sometimes drops you right where you need to be when you least expect it. 

They’ve finally gotten all their kids into their tents for the night and Cas collapses next to him by the dimming campfire embers in a heap. “I’m exhausted,” he sighs. “Who knew camping out could be so stressful when you’re already camping?”

Dean chuckles as he scoots closer until his leg bumps Cas’ shoulder. He’s smiles as the other young man immediately wraps his arm around Dean’s leg and slides his hand up the inside of Dean’s calf to his knee. 

Cas likes to touch him, for Dean, who’s never been touched much in his life other than some fists to the face, it’s a new experience. The kind of experience he never gets tired of. 

“You wouldn’t be so tired if you were so worried something horrible was going to happen to the kids all the time,” Dean teases as he reaches out to ruffle Cas’ hair. 

“You have to be ready for anything,” Cas shrugs. “I’ve found the bad things always seem to happen when you aren’t expecting them.”

“So, you plan to spend the rest of your life ever diligent?” Dean asks. Cas raises an eyebrow and Dean glares at him. Yeah, he knows what diligent means. Cas is the probably the only person in a fifty mile radius that knows Dean reads on higher than a fifth grade level and he’d prefer to keep it that way. 

People start thinking you’re smart and they start to watch you closer. 

“Children should feel safe,” Cas murmurs with this far away look in his eyes. “They shouldn’t have to worry about the monsters waiting in the darkness.”

He’s so tense, it makes Dean wonder what kinds of monsters got Cas, makes him wonder if they were different than the ones that he’s running from now. 

“You’re not the only one watching,” Dean offers softly as he uses the hand in Cas’ hair to gently turn him until they’re facing each other. Then he leans down and presses their mouths together. Cas cups his face and kisses back like it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him. 

When they break apart Dean looks into blue eyes shining in the dimming firelight, Cas smiles and whispers “Thank you.”


	17. Kiss 17: Rainbow

Title: Kiss 17  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Adam/Elijah  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 594  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Rainbow.

Kiss 17

“Leprechauns aren’t real,” Elijah announces. 

Adam sighs and rubs his eyes. It’s clearly going to be one of those conversations. “Good to know.” 

“I thought this might be helpful,” the angel continues. “Given the choice of profession you have decided to take on.”

He makes it sound so technical. Adam chills a little inside when he thinks about it. It’s not like he had a choice about hunting, like he could ever have gone back to normal after being brought back from the dead and thrown into Hell. 

He’s a Winchester…sort of. He’s starting the think maybe they just aren’t built for anything else. 

“Thanks,” he mutters as he slouches back onto the park bench. He wonders how out of all the angels his family has adopted his ends up being the weird one. He thought Castiel was bad enough and then he met Balthazar. Sam just laughs it off. He has it easy though. Dean gets the creeper stalker angel; Bobby ends up with the mouthy shit-head one. 

Sam has Gabriel. Gabriel’s actually kind of cool. 

Then there’s Elijah, oddly innocent, sort of nice sometimes, apparently caring, and totally clueless. Adam knows how to pick them for sure. 

The angel to his left sighs as though he’s very tired. Nothing much about his posture changes but Adam thinks maybe his shoulders are slumping like his wings are tired or something. 

“Are you okay?” He asks after some thought. 

“Why do you find me so distasteful now?” Elijah asks him suddenly. “I don’t understand it. You weren’t this way before.” 

“What are you talking about?” Adam asks. He met Elijah three weeks ago. The guy had just sort of shown up on the doorstep looking disheveled and confused and they had taken him in after Cas had given him the all clear. 

“When I pulled you from the cage,” Elijah explains like Adam is particularly dumb. “While I spent all that time healing you, you liked me then. You clung to me and begged me not to leave you. I came here because of you, because you wanted me and now it’s like it never happened. I don’t understand what I did wrong. I’m sorry it took me so long. I’ve never taken a vessel…finding one that was not still occupied by a human soul was complicated.”

“I don’t remember any of that,” Adam says softly his head hurts suddenly or maybe his heart. He’s not entirely sure. 

“That’s…unfortunate,” Elijah murmurs. He looks away for a moment before closing his eyes like he’s focusing intently on someone Adam can’t hear. 

“I should go,” the angel says abruptly. 

Adam grabs his shoulder before he can fly away. He’s not sure why he’s so desperate to keep Elijah from leaving. “Where are you going?”

The angel hesitates before leaning forward and brushing his lips across Adam’s forehead. The ache immediately lessens and Adam’s breath leaves him in a gasp. “Over the rainbow,” Elijah whispers with something like a grin. “If you want I could…come back?”

“I’ll save you a seat at dinner,” Adam murmurs. “Be home by six okay?”

There’s another brief touch of heat to his face that might be what Elijah’s lips feel like in his true form. It feels comforting, familiar, and then he’s alone. 

For now.


	18. Kiss 18:  High School Prom

Title: Kiss 18  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 527  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – high school prom.

Kiss 18

Dean Winchester has managed to avoid being caught up in prom fever for the whole of his employed career at Thomas Dale High School. He shows up on time, does his classes, cleans up the messes, and breaks up the occasional fight. Hell, Dean will even take triple duty at lunch times to avoid getting dragged into the Hell that is prom time at the high school. 

His number is up this year though and he knows it. The new guidance counselor, Castiel Novak has expressly asked for his participation and as much as Dean would like to choke the guy it’s only fair. 

Besides, he’s kind of hot. 

Really hot.

So Dean’s sat through endless discussion on theme with the student counsel and he’s helpfully hauled in material and stood on wobbly ladders stapling stars to the gym ceiling. He’s sat through two administration discussions as to appropriate behavior from students and musical tastes. Dean’s been good, he really has. 

But hell if he’s going to bite his tongue when the principle tells one of his shop students that she can’t take her girlfriend to prom. 

He’s surprised when the normally reserved and soft spoken new guidance counselor becomes his unlikely ally. 

“This is bullshit,” Dean snaps at the principal. “You’re full of shit and you know it.”

“Mr. Winchester,” Zachariah begins. “You’re in no place to cause such a commotion.”

“I’ll call the news,” Castiel says calmly from just to the left of Dean. “I’ll call the news and tell the student body, and contact the local colleges support groups. It will be everywhere by noon tomorrow.” 

“You wouldn’t dare,” Zachariah growls. “You’ll be unemployed by the end of the school year.”

Castiel smiles. “I was unemployed when I came here. It matters very little to me so long as I have my self respect.”

Dean follows him out. The guy’s not only cute, he’s awesome. 

“That man,” Castiel growls on their way to their cars. “Is a blight on the face of humanity.”

“That was really cool,” Dean chuckles. “He’s going to fire both of us, but it was really cool.” 

Castiel flushes, his eyes catching Dean’s for a moment in the afternoon sun. “Thank you. I hadn’t expected your support.”

“What?” Dean snorts. “The auto shop teacher can’t be gay?” 

“Oh,” Castiel says thoughtfully. “I hadn’t realized. In that case…”

Dean’s startled when the other man suddenly pins him against the side of his car. He’s opening his mouth in shock but settles for moaning in appreciation as Castiel’s lips settle over his and the smaller man kisses the life out of him. Dean gives as good as he gets, hauling Castiel closer to him until their hips grind together by grabbing handfuls of his ass. 

They break apart laughing against each others cheeks as the girls from the flag squad squeal and clap for them.


	19. Kiss 19:  Library

Title: Kiss 19  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 548  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – library.

Kiss 19

“I hate research,” Gabriel complains as he lounges against the periodical stack next to where Sam is sitting. “I died for the cause once. Doesn’t that opt me out of having to ever research again?”

Sam rolls his eyes and puts down the dirty, nasty, filthy, ancient book he’s been trying to read. “We’ve all died for the cause, Gabriel. Some of us more often than others. If Cas still has to research then so do you.” 

“It’s just because you like him better,” Gabriel accuses as he slumps down into the seat next to Sam and begrudgingly drags a book over with the tip of one finger like he thinks it might bite him. 

“I do not like Cas better than you,” Sam sighs. “I have no idea where you got that.”

There are a few blissful moments of silence before Gabriel blurts, “Dean likes Cas better than he likes me.”

“Dean likes Cas better than he likes me most of the time,” Sam points out. “What’s your point?”

“I don’t have one,” Gabriel mumbles before going back to the book in front of him. 

But now Sam’s curious. “No,” he says as he turns toward the angel. “Why did you bring that up?”

“No reason,” Gabriel shrugs. “You got any chocolate?”

Sam’s not going to explain why he’s taken to carrying M&M’s around in his jacket. But he slides them across the table without comment. 

“You have a reason for everything,” he says as Gabriel opens the bag and starts stuffing his mouth full. 

The angel gives him a look that says the discussion is over. Sam could give less than a shit about that look. 

“Spill it,” he commands as he slaps his hand down on top of the candy package before Gabriel can get any more out of it. 

“Have you ever just….wanted to be liked, Sam?” Gabriel asks after a minute of silence. 

Sam flinches at how close to home that hits on some of his personal issues. 

“I’ve been alone a long time,” Gabriel says as he traces circles on the table top with his fingertips. “It’s been a very long time since anyone actually knew me for who I really am.”

It’s on the tip of Sam’s tongue to say he’s not sure they even really know who Gabriel is. But he stops himself; he asked the question it’s only fair he lets Gabriel answer it. Just because the answer makes Sam feel panicky inside doesn’t mean he gets to run. 

“I just sort of maybe,” Gabriel closes his eyes while he forces out, “want someone to like me best.”

Oh. 

“Oh.” Sam whispers. Does he ever know how that feels. 

He’s not sure what possess him to lean over and press his lips to Gabriel’s temple but the angel leans into the contact instead of jerking away like Sam suspected he would. 

“I like you,” Sam murmurs into his hair. 

“I like you too, Sam,” Gabriel whispers back as their hands brush and their fingers tangle together.


	20. Kiss 20:  To Keep Gabriel Quiet

Title: Kiss 20  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 625  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – To keep Gabriel quiet.

Kiss 20

Gabriel is a talker. 

Sam’s known this fact for as long as he can remember. Hell, back in the day when Sam was really little Gabriel’s mom would bring Castiel over to play with Dean and Gabriel would inherit the honor of babysitting Sam while the women drank Lynchburg Lemonades and gossiped until Gabriel’s mom was too drunk to drive home. 

He talked non-stop back then too. Though, Sam remembers as he thinks about it now, that he loved it when Gabriel talked to him. With Gabriel it was easy; he talked to Sam like Sam was more than just a kid. He treated Sam like an equal. 

Sam had thrived on it, really. Everyone else in his life always treated Sam like a little kid. 

And ok, so he was a little kid…but still. 

Then the Novak’s moved away. 

His mother still tells horrible stories about how he and Dean cried themselves to sleep for weeks when that happened. 

But Dean’s always been kind of funny about friends. He doesn’t have many and he holds on tight to the people he loves. 

The proof is in the pudding, so to speak. Or rather in the five foot tall wedding cake Sam is standing next to in the middle of his brother’s wedding reception. 

He married Castiel, of course.

And Sam has spent the last week dancing around Castiel’s older brother because he just doesn’t know what to do with Gabriel anymore. 

Sam’s not a little kid any more and Gabriel’s….hot.

Really fucking hot. 

“So,” Gabriel blurts as he steps up next to Sam. “I give them a year tops before they start talking about having kids. My little, somber, serious, super-smart brother just married Dean Winchester. Who would have seen that coming? I sure didn’t. And look at you! You’re like the size of the Chrysler Building, Sam. When did you get so big and why? I mean you were a perfectly normal sized kid the last time I saw you and now…Jesus. You’re like Sasquatch.”

“You’re rambling,” Sam points out as Cas dips his brother on the dance floor while wearing a huge smile. 

“I’m a little drunk,” Gabriel chuckles. “Happy for them though. They’re cute. Go team gay.”

Sam chokes on his champagne, “Was that a gay slur?”

“Are you nuts?” Gabriel looks totally lost. “It’s hard to slur your own team, Kiddo. I’m more of a switch hitter if you know what I mean but I’m an equal opportunity kind of guy. Take you for instance…if you were interested I would totally put out. Hell, I’m easy; just point me to the bedroom. I bet you’re a fun ride.”

Sam blushes. Gabriel’s rant started out while the music was still playing so he was sort of yelling over top of it. But the song’s over now and people are starting to look at them funny. Hell, Dean and Cas are flat out staring while they point and laugh. 

Sam does the only thing he can think of. He grabs Gabriel’s collar and bends down to claim his mouth while Gabriel’s still blurting out euphemisms for them having sex. The last comment turns into a garbled moan of pleasure and by the time they are done kissing Gabriel’s leaning heavily against Sam’s chest.

“Hey, Sam,” Gabriel whispers dreamily. 

“Hey,” Sam whispers back with a smile as he tucks a bit of Gabriel’s hair behind his ear. 

They hold hands the rest of the night.


	21. Kiss 21: Coming Home

Title: Kiss 21  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Lucifer/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 529  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Coming Home.

Kiss 21

The fires between them are never really put out. 

Gabriel never forgives him for leaving.

Lucifer never forgives Gabriel for refusing to come with him. 

The wounds are deep, the divide huge and the ground beneath them crumbling. They stand on opposite sides and glare at each other over the ruin of the world. 

Where do we go when we die? 

Where to angels go when the light of their grace is burned out of them?

Lucifer doesn’t know the answer. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get the chance to find out. 

He’s not what he once was and his fire has long since gone cold. 

Gabriel would have never wanted him this way anyway. 

It’s what he tells himself to justify the slaughter of the one who once loved him best. That he spared his beautiful brother having to witness the fall of the world at his hands. 

But the moment after he strikes, as Gabriel’s eyes widen in disbelief Lucifer does something he hasn’t done in a millennium. 

He feels. 

He grieves. 

He regrets. 

It makes him feel broken and weak inside. He hates Gabriel all the more for it. 

Gabriel who once refused to leave Heaven to be with him only to abandon it later to live among the beings Lucifer so despised. 

He’s never been good enough. 

It’s with that thought that Lucifer allows his grace to pool out of him onto the floor of his cage. 

He has nothing more to live for. There’s nothing left for him here. 

He burns in the fires of Hell….only to awake in a garden. 

“Took you long enough,” Gabriel snorts from the bench he sits on watching Lucifer struggle to sit up. 

“Gabriel?” he manages. 

“Don’t ask me,” Gabriel shrugs. “I’m not sure how we ended up here. But man, have I been waiting for you. You take forever!”

“How did you know I was coming?” Lucifer groans as he rises so that he’s kneeling in front of Gabriel. He stretches and then moans in happiness as his wing unfurl fully for the first time in ages. 

“I just knew,” Gabriel sighs before reaching up to brush his fingers along the upper ridge of Lucifer’s wing. “I had this feeling you would want me here.”

It’s on the tip of his tongue to refute the statement. Lucifer doesn’t need anyone or want anything, especially this odd kindness and serenity that Gabriel’s touch offers. 

He doesn’t deserve comfort. 

“Yes, you do,” Gabriel whispers as though he had spoken aloud. “And you want it so badly.”

He’s curling forward and burying his face in Gabriel’s lap before he processes it. Gasping in pleasure as Gabriel combs his fingers through feathers too long untouched. 

It feels so good, so right. 

He looks up to meet Gabriel’s gaze only to have his brother’s lips brush across his forehead like a benediction. 

Gabriel whispers, “Welcome home.”


	22. Kiss 22: Save

Title: Kiss 22  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Adam/Chuck  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 537  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Save.

Kiss 22

He’s lost it. 

No, really he has.

Adam’s been working on his thesis for six months. He’s researched, investigated, interviewed, and harassed nearly everyone in a fifty mile radius if not farther about his topic on environmental changes impacting the local bird populations. 

It’s been abject, horrible, hell. 

He’s wanted to quit for months and just never graduate. If it weren’t for his older half-brothers breathing down the back of his neck to actually make something of himself with his education he would have said ‘fuck it!’ a long time ago. 

But he finally got it all done. He finished it, proofed it, edited it, and had it all ready to print. 

And now his flash drive is dead. 

Totally fucking dead. 

The data is still there, but the motherboard is fried…useless. He’s totally fucked. 

“I’m totally fucked,” he gasps as he sits in the computer lab stunned. “Oh my God.”

“What?” Chuck Shirley asks. He’s the computer lab tech. They don’t really know each other personally but Adam’s been spending enough evening and weekend hours in the lab to know that Chuck has about as much of a personal life as Adam does. 

The guy’s a nervous wreck most of the time around people. He’s better around machines.

Adam doesn’t answer. He can’t really say it out loud or it will be true. 

Besides, he doesn’t want to have to tell Chuck Shirley, King of the computer nerds, that he is stupid enough to not have a back-up of his THESIS. 

He holds up the flash drive instead and waves it around like a little white flag. 

“Oh,” chuck says as he comes over to snatch the drive out of Adam’s hand and carry it back to his computer at the front of the lab. There are a few minutes where Chuck works on the drive and Adam resist the urge to put his head between his knees and practice deep breathing. 

“You’re fucked,” Chuck blurts. 

Adam bites his lip and feel tears well up in his eyes. “My thesis,” he manages to choke out. 

“Whoa,” Chuck says as he sits back in his chair. “Okay, before we panic, let me take it home and see what I can do.”

“You can fix it?” Adam asks as the world suddenly seems like a hugely more positive place.

“Umm, no,” Chuck says with a slow shake of his head. “It’s dead. No fixing. But I might be able to get the data off. No promises. It will take a few days.” 

Adam agrees, what the hell does he have to lose?

Three days later he rolls into the lab to check his email and finds Chuck dangling his broken flash drive from one hand and his freshly printed thesis in the other. 

Adam does what any red-blooded young man would do in his situation. 

He grabs the little nerdy computer lab tech by both cheeks and kisses Chuck for all he’s worth.


	23. Kiss 23: Library - Follow Up to Kiss 17

Title: Kiss 23  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Adam/Elijah  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 517  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – library (follow up to kiss 17.)

Kiss 23

They’ve been on the road together for a few weeks now. Adam and Elijah have worked out some kind of odd partnership that seems to be working. 

They’ve taken out a nest of vampires, a wendigo, and some kind of weird cat looking thing that Bobby is still trying to identify. 

But that’s only half the story. 

The other half of their story, and probably the bigger half, involves their personal relationship. 

Or what’s becoming their personal relationship. Adam still doesn’t know what to make of Elijah more than half the time. But he likes what he learning. There’s warmth, a safety there in the angel’s touches and presence. 

Sometimes, Adam will turn his head and catch Elijah looking at him with a gaze so full of longing that it makes his heart skip a beat or two. 

Before, when Adam didn’t know anything about ghouls or Winchester brothers, he’d never had anyone look at him like that. But he had imagined that would be the look his future wife had on her face when she would see him come home from work at the end of the day. 

But instead of medical school, Adam got hunting, and instead of a future wife he has an angel by his side. 

An angel he likes a whole lot. 

Maybe more than a whole lot. 

A lot more. 

“Adam,” Elijah murmurs so as not to disturb the other people using the library. “Are you well?” 

“Yeah,” Adam can’t help but smile at his partner’s concern. It’s like Elijah has a direct line to Adam’s soul. The guy can read Adam’s emotional changes sometimes before Adam’s even got them figured out. 

“Have you found anything useful?” Elijah asks as he points to the books spread out before them. 

“Not about the case,” Adam says with a shake of his head. 

“About something else then?” Elijah asks with a wrinkle of his brow. 

Adam shoves the books away and leans over, well into the angel’s personal space. “About us,” he answers quietly. 

Elijah blushes. It’s kind of adorable. 

“Something good?” Elijah prompts when Adam doesn’t say anything more. 

“Oh, yeah,” Adam grins as he dips forward and slides a hand around Elijah’s neck before pulling the angel forward and kissing him. 

Elijah flails and Adam feels a rush of wind that he swears comes from the angel’s wings. But then Elijah is clinging to him with a noise that makes the lights flicker around them. 

Adam distantly hears the libraries other patrons complaining. He opens his eyes as their kiss ends and he sees lights blown out and papers blown everywhere. The computer in the corner is flashing a blue screen and he’s lost his place in the book he was reading. 

He could care less. 

His angel is all smiles.


	24. Kiss 24:  Magic

Title: Kiss 24  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Gabe/Becky  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 511  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – magic

Kiss 24

He could make you think your ass was your head if given enough incentive. 

Gabriel’s just one of those guys. 

He has the gift of the gab, showmanship, a way of drawing people into his world and making them think he’s in control, knows it all, has everything covered. 

Or at least, that’s his act. 

Becky stands to the side in her cute, little, low-cut leotard, and waves her arms for the dramatic reveal. She dips and tumbles when she’s supposed to and contorts herself into a hundred horribly uncomfortable positions because the illusion is everything in the magic world. 

Gabriel’s illusions are the best. 

It’s what has made them headliners in Las Vegas and won them a trip on the world circuit next year. They’re headed to the top, Penn and Teller can go fuck themselves. 

But the biggest illusion of all is the one Becky plays out every day in her real life. 

She’s in love with Gabriel, has been for as long as she remembers. But first he was married, then the divorce went ugly. Then he swore off dating for a year and by the time he got over himself Becky was dating this really tall guy that just ended up not being right for her. 

His brother was a hot mess. 

Now, they’re kind of in a stalemate. Gabriel’s oblivious and Becky is torn. Things are good between them right now…why mess that up for the unknown of romance?

“Wanna see a magic trick?” Gabriel asks as he flops down on her couch in her apartment. She’s not exactly certain she ever gave him a key, but Gabriel can pretty much come and go as he pleases from just about anywhere anyway. 

“Can you make my headache go away?” Becky challenges. Her night out with the girls turned into her crawling home at the ass crack of dawn hung over off her ass. 

So of course, Gabriel wants to talk this morning. 

“I don’t know,” Gabriel shrugs. “But I bet I can get you to forget all about it for a while even if it comes back later.”

“You’re not going to stomp on my foot are you?” Becky’s nervous, Gabriel’s a good guy at the heart of it but she’s not putting anything past him. He’s a joker, a trickster, and sometimes he goes too far. 

The man knows no limits. 

“Of course not,” Gabriel actually sounds a little offended. 

“Okay,” she relents with a sigh, “Hit me.”

He kisses her…sweetly, like she’s important to him, like he cares about her response. 

Like this isn’t a joke. 

When they break apart she blinks at his worried expression for a moment before asking, “What’s the trick?” 

He smiles, full of false bravado, “I stole your heart…right?”

Becky grins, “Best trick ever.”


	25. Kiss 25: Mouth to Mouth

Title: Kiss 25  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Castiel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 538  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – mouth to mouth

Kiss 25

Castiel’s cold, wet, frozen beneath him as Sam drags him up out of the water and onto the bank. 

This never should have happened; they shouldn’t have been out here. 

Dean’s going to kill him. 

“Cas?” Sam questions as he leans down over his friend and shakes the other man a little. 

Castiel’s not an angel anymore; it’s hard for Sam to remember that at times, like when his friend shoves him out of the way of a black dog and ends up toppling over the railing and off the bridge into the freezing water of the river below. 

They never thought to teach Castiel to swim, not while they were teaching him other things like eating, and drinking, going to the bathroom and brushing your teeth. All of it is stuff that seems mindless to all of us until you have a grown man sitting in your car that doesn’t know what the pee-pee dance is while he’s performing it. 

Now Castiel’s not moving, and Sam has a lot of regrets about their misplaced priorities. Less time educating him on safe sex, more time on keeping him alive. 

“Cas?” he asks again as he bends over his friend’s form and tilts Castiel’s head back so he can see if there’s something blocking his throat. 

There’s a weak pulse, no breath, Sam knows what he has to do. 

His first attempt at resuscitation is crappy, Castiel’s not responsive and the bank is too soft to get him in the right position. So Sam hauls him up and carries him over to the street where he flops him down and re-checks his condition. 

No pulse this time. 

Dean really is going to have his ass. 

He tips his friend’s head back and pushes his chin down, bending over and breathing into Castiel’s mouth twice before slipping back up to start compressions. 

Rinse and repeat and repeat and repeat. Sam’s exhausted and the man he’s trying to save isn’t responding. 

He would pray, but let’s face it, no one is listening. 

Sam doesn’t panic easily. It’s a slow building kind of dread that he’s developed after years of doing what they do. His body is moving on autopilot right now. He has to keep trying, it doesn’t matter that he’s injured, his back is screaming because for some reason he’s way too tall. Castiel wouldn’t give up on him. Castiel pulled him out of the cage. 

He’s not giving up on his friend, on his brother. 

Two more rotations and he bets Dean’s trying to call him right now, his cell phone ruined and water logged. No way to get help. 

Castiel jerks beneath him as he’s bending down again to breathe and then there’s water everywhere as he rolls his friend over to help him cough it up. 

Castiel takes a few ragged breaths and collapses back onto the ground. “I need to learn to swim,” he says weakly.

“Damn straight,” Sam agrees.


	26. Kiss 26:  Supposedly Accidental

Title: Kiss 26  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Lucifer  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 567  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – supposedly accidental

Kiss 26

It was dark. 

That’s his story and he’s sticking to it, Damn it.

How was Dean supposed to know Lucifer was the one to follow him into the coat closet?

It was supposed to be Castiel or Gabriel even, Hell any of the weird-ass Novak’s would have been better than their uber stuck up oldest sibling. But a dare is a dare and a bet is a bet and Dean’s never lost a bet in his life. 

Tonight wasn’t going to be the night. 

So yeah, he went into the coat closet, turned out the light, and sucked face with the first Novak to cross the threshold. 

He’ll have to ask Sam later if Lucifer knew what he was in for or if the poor guy might think Dean sexually assaulted him. He’ll ask his sibling when he’s finished beating Sam’s ass for being enough of a bitch to let him get set up like that.

Supposed to be a fun drinking game with some college frat buddies and their brother’s before the holiday break…what a bunch of assholes. 

Still though, Lucifer’s a pretty good kisser. Dean can admit that much. The guy’s got an underlying sense of grace that Dean knows he’s certainly lacking. 

Not that it matters, not ever going to happen again. Lucifer’s as straight as they come, uptight, too. Dean would have more luck trying to slip into bed with a rabid woodchuck than making progress with him. 

So he’s a little shocked when Lucifer’s sitting on the hood of his car the next day when Dean heads out to load the car before he and Sam start the drive back home. 

“What are you doing here?” Dean asks by way of greeting. He stops and looks around just to make sure the sourpuss didn’t really call the police on him. There might have been some uncalled for groping. Hell, Dean didn’t know who it was. 

“I want to discuss last night with you,” Lucifer replies. He looks sure of himself, solid, but he’s twisting his fingers into his pants and Dean knows body posture well enough to know a tell when he sees it. 

“You want an apology?” Dean snaps defensively in the light of day. “I’m not the one who set you up man. Go bitch out your brothers.”

“I wasn’t set up,” Lucifer answers before he swallows. “I understood the game. I was curious.”

“So why are you here now?” Dean presses as he crosses his arms. “Still curious?” 

“Perhaps,” Lucifer says with a shrug of his shoulders. “Would you kiss me now, knowing who I am?” 

“Are you shitting me?” Dean snorts. 

There is no way this is happening. 

Lucifer tenses, gets to his feet and turns to stalk away. “I see,” is his cold response. 

Dean trips him. 

Anger flares up behind Lucifer’s eyes as he stumbles, turning to face Dean with snarl. 

Dean kisses him. 

It’s probably a little better kiss than the one from last night. 

“If anyone asks,” Dean murmurs into his mouth. “You can tell them you tripped and fell on my mouth.”

Against his lips, Lucifer smiles.


	27. Kiss 27:  Ice Cream

Title: Kiss 27  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 521  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Ice Cream

Kiss 27

Sixty three thousand one hundred forty two screaming children later and Dean has survived his first July fourth weekend working the front counter in the ice cream shop around the corner from his house. 

It’s supposed to be easy money…it’s a nightmare.

The parents are ignorant and demanding, the kids are out of control and whiny. Dean’s been ready to kill every single customer he’s served since they opened the shop yesterday and that was two shifts ago. 

Clearly this is not his calling in life. 

Though Dean has to admit he’s probably not having as bad a day as Gabriel. His best friend works in the back, making the flavors and churning the product in this mom and pop shop. Today, the milkshake machine backed up on him and Gabriel was covered head to toe in the glop that eventually becomes what Dean used to think of as yummy goodness before he took this job. 

Now he’s pretty sure he’ll be sticking to pie and whipped cream for the rest of his life. 

Gabriel’s filthy, grumpy, and clearly exhausted. He has rings under his eyes and his jaw is clinched tightly shut holding his ‘Of course everything is wonderful!’ grin firmly in place. 

Dean knows it’s bullshit, he’s just always shocked no one else seems to tell. 

“Go home, Man,” Dean orders as Gabriel makes a third pass across the back counter with his rag. His arms are shaking and Dean starting to worry maybe there’s more going on with his buddy than a miserable few days at work. 

“Can’t,” Gabriel mumbles, almost too softly for Dean to hear. “Things to do, counters to clean.”  
“I can handle it,” Dean offers. “Go get some rest.”

Gabriel snorts, an aggravated sound of dismissal if Dean’s ever heard one, “Home’s not exactly restful for me right now, Deano,” Gabriel shakes his head. “Things aren’t going so hot.”

It’s code, long understood between them. Gabriel’s home life has never really been something you might call stable. Then last year, his mother remarried and his new step dad was some kind of pastor. Gabriel doesn’t do well with structure, he’s always sort of created anarchy wherever he goes. 

Kind of like how he mixed all the chocolate sprinkles into the multi-colored ones because he said he didn’t believe in segregation. 

“Then hurry the fuck up,” Dean blurts as he shoves at Gabriel’s shoulder gently. “You’re coming home with me and I’m not staying here a second longer than I have to.” 

He’s expecting a smart ass reply, or for Gabriel to hurl the filthy rag at his head. So Dean’s really caught off guard when Gabriel leans forward into his personal space and presses a kiss to the side of his jaw before leaning away and going back to cleaning the counters. 

It makes something inside Dean melt.


	28. Kiss 28:  Ikea

Title: Kiss 28  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 614  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Ikea

Kiss 28

Dean thinks it’s a little bit gay. 

Castiel could probably argue the point but he’s gay so if his favorite store to shop in for furniture is a little bit gay then he assumes it fits nicely, thank you very much. 

Ikea…the store of the Gods. Castiel thinks he hears angels singing every time the electronic doors swoosh open to grant him entrance. 

He loves this store, is obsessed with this store, wants to marry and have babies with this store. 

Clearly he has a bit of an obsession but at a two hour drive he doesn’t get to come here that often, much less make a major purchase. 

Or bring his best friend. 

Boyfriend?

Bisexual roommate that he lusts after with no hope of ever actually getting his hands on?

Castiel’s not sure which category Dean fits in yet. He’s working on it. 

“Beds are on the second floor,” Dean grumbles as he points at a sign. 

“But you have to get the full experience by starting at the beginning,” Castiel points out as he walks over to where the crowd of people are filtering through the store.

“So you want to follow the yellow brick road, Dorothy?” Dean complains as he rolls his eyes. But Castiel’s pleased he doesn’t actually resist heading over to the main entrance. 

“You only live once,” Castiel teases as he follows behind Dean. 

“And you want to waste the precious moments of your life in a department store,” Dean huffs. 

“Not a department store, Dean,” Castiel sighs. “The department store.” 

“You’re sick,” Dean says with a shake of his head. “You know that right?”

Castiel ignores him until they wander their way through to the bed department. 

“What are you looking for?” Dean asks. 

Castiel has no real idea. He got the bigger bedroom when they moved in together and it’s the first time he’s had the chance to have more than a single bed. 

Not like he has anyone to share it with right now, but still…it would be nice to have the room should things change. 

“A double,” Castiel finally answers. 

“How about a queen?” Dean offers. “The price isn’t that different and you get a lot of extra room.”

“It’s only me,” Castiel points out as though Dean hasn’t been present for every bit of his non-existent sex life thus far. 

“Yeah,” Dean nods slowly before sucking his lower lip in his mouth to suck on it. A habit of his that never fails to make Castiel achingly hard in seconds. “But not forever. What if the person you get involved with likes to spread out when he sleeps?”

Castiel’s never shared a bed with anyone; in the end he takes Dean’s advice and purchases a queen with storage drawers underneath. They load it up into the back of Dean’s old pickup truck and tie everything down. 

That night when they finish setting it all up Castiel flops on the mattress next to where Dean is stretched across it, taking up more then half the bed. “I should have gotten a king,” Castiel comments as he pokes Dean in the ribs. 

Dean rolls until he’s leaning over Castiel’s prone form. “No, this is perfect. I want to be able to touch you.” 

Then Dean’s kissing him in the center of his new Ikea bed. 

Castiel will insist for years the items that come from there are filled with magic.


	29. Kiss 29:  Homecoming Game

Title: Kiss 29  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Adam/Jo  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 593  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Homecoming game

Kiss 29

Adam’s been waiting for this game for months; even though she hadn’t been sure the team would get through he had known she was crazy. 

Jo’s always doubted herself when she didn’t need to do so. 

Her school field hockey team is the best in the tri-county area so in Adam’s mind there hadn’t been any doubt that his friend was going to make it to the top. 

Homecoming was just a step on the way there. 

And okay, it’s not football. But since when did Adam give a shit about being different. He sucks at sports, not a good team player. Something his older brothers say must run in the family. 

So he sits in the stands which remain mostly empty but for parents and boyfriends and cheers Jo on as hard as he can. 

Her mom has to work nights, so there’s never anyone else there to scream for her. 

He likes her, likes Jo a lot actually. He sort of wishes that maybe she was more interested in him because if she was, then nothing would hold him back from making Jo his. 

They’re already friends…it would be so much better if he could call her his girlfriend. 

Adam’s got plans, goals; he’s going to college in the fall, then onto medical school. He’s going to be a doctor. 

Jo says she’s going to work at the bar until she dies. She says this season is going to be the high point of her life and it’s all down hill for a girl like her after this. 

He wants so much to prove her wrong. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” she asks as she wanders out of the locker room and finds him leaning against the wall. 

“You’re a good team captain,” Adam comments. “The girls respect you, they look up to you.”

“Thanks,” Jo says casually. But the look on her face is suspicious. “Now, why are you telling me that?”

“You could do more,” Adam shrugs. “Be a better role model if you were planning ahead for college.”

“Fuck, Adam,” Jo huffs as she pushes past him toward the car. “Again with this crap?”

“It’s not crap,” Adam defends. “You won homecoming against the hardest team in the division. Why does college seem so out of place for you?”

“Shut up, Adam,” Jo growls as she gets to the car. “You’re not my boyfriend or anything, why do you care what I do?” 

“Jesus!” Adam shouts loudly enough that she jumps. “You know, I wonder about me sometimes. About what makes me want to be with someone as defensive and nutty as you, but I do. So help me, if I thought I had a chance I would kiss you right now.”

“Why don’t you think you have a chance?” Jo asks. 

Adam does the only thing he can think of and just gets in the car to drive home. He jerks when she reaches out to touch his hand where it’s clenched on the steering wheel. 

“If you want to be my girlfriend then you have to go to college,” Adam murmurs. 

“Why?” Jo snorts.

“Because I’m not leaving you behind in the fall when I go,” Adam snaps. 

“Who said anything about me staying behind, you idiot?” 

Then she’s kissing him.


	30. Kiss 30:  Cassiopia

Title: Kiss 30  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 674  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Cassiopeia 

Kiss 30

“Hey Cassandra,” Dean announces as he walks back into his dorm room. “You know where my English Lit book is?”

His roommate clenches his jaw before turning shining blue eyes toward him and growling, “My name is not Cassandra.”

“Yeah whatever, Dude,” Dean shrugs as he digs through his extra large pile of dirty clothing and suspects he might have to break down and do laundry this weekend. “I just need my book.”

“It’s in the bathroom,” his roommate answers as he turns back to his ipad. “You left it there yesterday.”

“Thanks, Casey,” Dean chuckles as he grabs the book from the bathroom and turns on his heel fleeing the room before the other guy can hit him with the book he’s currently hurling through the air. 

Riling up his roomy is way too much fun. 

Dean hadn’t planned on going to college. Hadn’t planned much of anything besides joining the marines like his dad had done just out of high school. He served his country, did two tours in Afghanistan and came home with money to further his education. 

Funny thing about getting shot at a lot, it makes you want more out of your life than fixing up beat-to-hell old cars. 

So he went to college, like his little brother. Dean doesn’t have lofty goals like Sam about becoming a big time lawyer. He wants to be a nurse. He watched too many of his friends get injured on the battlefield and not get the help they needed. 

One day Dean’s going to work at the VA and actually be able to do something for those guys.

Harassing his roommate is just part of the fun of higher education. 

Castiel Novak is so up-tight Dean’s pretty sure his ulcers have ulcers. He’s spent the first half of this semester doing anything to make the guy laugh and when that didn’t pan out he settled for straight out annoyance, just to see if he could get a reaction. 

He knows Cas’ name. But for some reason alluding to it being female really ticks Cas off. So Dean’s been working it for all he’s worth, even if it means hours spent on-line researching all girls’ names that start with C A S. He’s running out of options soon. Dean’s going to have find a new game. 

He’s pretty much just down to the weird ones and soon Cas is going to realize how much effort Dean’s put into this. 

By the time he gets back to the room it’s after dinner. Cas is in the shower. Dean smacks the curtain on the way by to the toilet stall and shouts over the noise of the water, “Hey, Casadee!”

He’s barely got his pants unzipped before he has an armload of naked roommate shoving him into the wall of the bathroom snarling, “THAT IS NOT MY NAME!”

“Cashmere?” Dean offers even though he knows this has probably gone too far. He never could resist pushing the envelope. “Casina? How about Casta, or Cassiopeia?”

The hands around his t-shirt clench as Cas growls, “I am not a girl.”

“Yeah,” Dean swallows against the lump in his throat at the forceful gaze his very naked roommate is giving him. “I…um…kind of noticed. You’re hard to mistake when you’re dressed like this.” 

“Why must you always tease me so?” Cas asks him. 

Dean’s having a hard time thinking clearly, that’s the excuse he’ll use later for why instead of pushing his angry roommate away he’s sliding his hands over the water slicked skin of Cas’ boney hips before leaning forward and kissing him roughly.

By the next morning Dean’s pretty sure Cas knows Dean knows his name…he moaned it loudly enough times the whole building probably knows it too.


	31. Kiss 31:  Flannel Pj's

Title: Kiss 31  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 629  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Flannel Pj’s. 

Kiss 31

They’re blue, like his eyes, and they have little yellow ducks on them. 

Dean’s never understood Castiel’s taste in clothing. He’s always so formal in the way he dresses which makes no sense when you count in that it’s coupled with the fact that he buys shirts three sizes too big and never takes his trench coat off. 

But then you get to know him, and once he gets comfortable things sort of change. 

Dean’s been Castiel’s friend since they shared a music stand in middle school during their forced tour in band. Neither of them was ever going to be the worlds next most popular musician, but they made up the time spent not practicing by becoming friends. 

Even back then, Castiel had a love of layers. It’s just that back then Dean never suspected the real reason why. 

It’s easier to cover the scars that way. 

They don’t talk about it much. 

But now, edging closer to thirty, Dean’s had half his lifetime to work his way under the layers of material to where he and his best friend can sit side by side watching a movie in nothing but really old flannel pajama pants and ripped t-shirts. 

Or in Castiel’s case just the pajama pants. Dean’s always felt kind of privileged that Castiel trusts him this much, so much that maybe he’s become a second skin to his friend who doesn’t even make an effort to cover up the marks crisscrossing his shoulders and over the top of his chest. 

Dean’s spent a lot of time wondering what it must have felt like to be burned so badly, Castiel’s only a few times alluded to how many months he spent in the hospital and all the procedures he had to suffer through to fix him after the fire. 

All these years later, and Dean still thinks it looks like his skin is stretched too tightly over his bones. 

Puberty had been a rough process, requiring new grafts and time missed from school. 

Dean’s still never told his parents he failed the ninth grade on purpose when he found out they were going to hold Castiel back a year for missing too many days. 

Dean’s not really sure why tonight he can’t stop looking. Dean’s always been one to push the envelope and tonight looking isn’t enough anymore. 

Castiel flinches at the first brush of his fingers over the top edge of the scar along his neck that he covers with collared shirts and rumpled ties. But then he’s tipping his head to the side to give Dean more room like this strange thing going on between them is some kind of grooming they do all the time. 

Like Dean’s not suddenly breaking all their unspoken rules. 

When he’s finished exploring the texture of the rough skin on Castiel’s neck, Dean rubs the back of his knuckles along the side of his friend’s stubbled cheek. It feels good to touch, feels like there’s something here just waiting for Dean to explore it. 

Castiel turns his head then, lips brushing along Dean’s skin in the faintest of kisses. If Castiel’s eyes weren’t focused on him the way they are he would swear it was a mistake. 

But it’s not, Dean thinks maybe he’s just now figured out what Castiel’s been trying to tell him buy stripping all of his armor away. 

He smiles as he finally gets the message, and Castiel slides over until he’s tucked snuggly up against Dean’s side.


	32. Kiss 32: Tears

Title: Kiss 32  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 666  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – tears. 

Kiss 32

“I’ll miss your stupid ass,” Gabriel comments from where he’s sprawled across Dean’s bed looking at a comic book. 

“Yeah, whatever,” Dean mumbles as he tosses stuff into the last open box in his room. “You won’t even remember my name by the time school starts.”

“That’s bullshit,” Gabriel huffs, rolling over to put his hands behind his head and stare blankly up at the ceiling in Dean’s childhood bedroom. “You’re my best friend, and as annoying as you are, it’s going to be weird with you not around.”

“It’s only for the semester,” Dean shrugs before sealing up the box and realizing he has no more reason to stall just tossing it in the back of his car and driving off to his first year of college alone. “I’ll call, we’ll email, and I’ll be back at Christmas.”

“You say that,” Gabriel snorts. “But once you get there it’s all over for us. You’ll move on in the great big world and I’ll be stuck here in BFE.”

“Gabriel,” Dean sighs. He doesn’t really know what to say. Well, that’s not exactly true. He knows exactly what he wants to say, he wants to tell Gabriel to run home and pack a bag, wants to demand that his friend do more than hang out while he packs and tell him to get lost when he gets in the car to drive off. He wants Gabriel to come with him. But Gabriel can’t, not right now. Things are complicated. 

“Come on,” Gabriel orders when he notices Dean just sitting on the floor next to the last box. “Time to get on with your life.”

Dean follows him down the steps of his house and out into the driveway. It’s still early in the morning, Dean has a long drive ahead of him and he needs to get settled once he makes it to the University. He has a roommate to break in, classes to get ready for, a room to unpack. 

He doesn’t want to go. 

“Gabriel…” he starts again only to have his friend glare at him as he closes the car door behind the damned box and stuffs his hands in his pockets. 

“No way are you getting soft on me now, Winchester.” Gabriel’s eyes look defiant but glassy in the morning sun. 

“Can you stop being an ass for one fucking second?” Dean blurts, angry at how this is going even though he knows there’s just not any other way. 

“Fine,” Gabriel snaps, his jaw tight, hell, his whole body tight as he takes a few deep breathes before Dean notices the tears welling up and spilling out of his eyes. “If this is how you want it then you can have it this way. Doesn’t matter, you won’t come back after this anyway. I might as well just lay it all out there.”

Dean’s lost, and then Gabriel is pushing him back up against the car and pressing their bodies together before mumbling in too rapid speech, “Not just a friend, didn’t want to be just your friend. Wanted you, want to belong to you. Sorry, so sorry. Shouldn’t feel like this, shouldn’t tell you. Can’t let you go without it.”

For the rest of his life, when Dean Winchester thinks of their first kiss all he will remember is the sharp taste of spearmint from Gabriel’s gum and the wet press of his tear stained cheeks. 

He grabs Gabriel as he pulls away and drags him back, kisses him like he’s always wanted, kisses until he steals Gabriel’s gum. Dean figures it’s only fair, Gabriel stole his heart. 

When Gabriel comes to live with him the next semester Dean finds out Gabriel steals the covers too.


	33. Kiss 33: Swap Meet - Garage Sale

Title: Kiss 33  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Jo/Crowley  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 601  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – swap meet – garage sale. 

Kiss 33

“How much for this?” Jo asks as she holds up the necklace for Crowley to inspect. 

It’s his mothers, but he’s never been all that sentimental. 

“It’s a steal,” Crowley answers as he smiles slyly. “I’ll give it to you for next to nothing.”

“What exactly does that mean?” Jo huffs as she shifts her weight to one leg and crosses her arms. She doesn’t really like this guy, sure he’s new to the neighborhood and he has a nice accent. He’s clean and dresses well, but still. He’s sort of…shifty, snake like and Jo’s always been afraid of snakes. 

“Well,” he sighs with some put on dramatics. “It belonged to my dearly departed mother, so really the item is priceless in my eyes.” 

“The point?” Jo snaps, clearly getting irritated. 

“There can be no monetary value given to an item so full of memories,” Crowley grins again. “But I could be convinced to part with it for say…a kiss.”

“Oh…you are not serious,” Jo’s shocked, most of the men in the neighborhood make a wide path around her. The Harville name is nothing to be messed with in these parts and there he is, just leaning against the table and batting his eyes at her like she’s the prey here and he’s the hunter. 

He is so, so wrong. 

“How about this,” she counters. “I take your necklace, promise not to break your nose just for thinking you could get away with something so stupid, and we call it even.”

Crowley has to consider his options for a moment. He had been betting on her just tossing the thing back in his face. The fact the trinket is still in her hands must mean she really likes it. “Let’s sweeten the pot, shall we?” When she glares at him silently he pushes forward with, “You keep the necklace, I keep my nose, you join me for dinner tomorrow, and we’ll see if I get my kiss?”

“I get the necklace, no broken nose, I meet you for lunch, at a place of my choosing, you pay, keep your hands to yourself, and I might let you walk me home.”

“You get the necklace, No broken nose, I meet you for lunch and I’ll pay, but I get to hold your hand on the walk home and you kiss me goodbye.”

“What if I have lunch with you and can’t stand you?” Jo questions. 

“What if you have lunch with me and want me to stay for dinner?” Crowley teases. 

“That’s not an answer,” Jo argues. 

“You want me to tell you that you don’t have to kiss me, but I’m going to do it. Take it or leave it, final offers.” Crowley leans away with his arms crosses, part of him wondering if she might be able to actually see how fast his heart is pounding. 

They go to lunch the next day, Jo doesn’t kiss him goodbye. He complains about being cheated and she tells him he’ll just have to keep trying. 

So he does. 

Again and again, and again. 

Two weeks later he’s helping her make a salad for dinner when it happens. Jo’s arms around him, the sweet smell of her hair, and his hands still under the running water washing off the lettuce. 

It was worth the wait.


	34. Kiss 34:  Truth or Dare

Title: Kiss 34  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 682  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – truth or dare. 

Kiss 34

Sam rolls eyes as his brother crams his junk into the frilly pink panties Castiel produces before sitting down, cheeks flaming the same color as the undies while he struggles to act like the dare isn’t a little too close to fun for him. 

Dean’s a weird one, Sam knows this better than anyone, but Castiel really takes the cake. Sam wonders if it’s occurred to anyone else to wonder why he was carrying frilly pink panties around in his trench coat anyway. It’s not like when they planned the party Truth or Dare had been on the invitation. 

“Your turn, Sammifer,” Gabriel chuckles drunkenly from the other side of the couch they’re both reclining against. 

Sam doesn’t remember when the game moved to the floor, or the floor moved up to him…he’s a little drunker than he thought maybe. 

“Okay,” Sam shivers, trying to prepare himself for managing dealing with Gabriel. “Truth or Dare?”

Gabriel grins. “You know I always pick dare.”

Dean groans, Castiel hums a little with what Sam think is probably annoyance. Gabriel has this way of making dares uncomfortable for everyone involved, and Sam, frankly sucks at making them up in the first place. 

But this time, he has a plan. 

“I dare you to answer three questions from me at some point in the future with the truth.”

Silence…and then Gabriel swallows like he has something stuck in his throat. “You’re daring me to tell you the truth?”

“Not right now,” Sam assures him. “Later. At some point in the future I get to ask you any three questions and you’ll answer them without lying to me.”

“Okay,” Gabriel nods a little slowly like he’s sure he’s agreeing to something he’s going to regret later. 

Then the moment’s over and Gabriel asks, “Truth or dare, Sammy?”

Sam glares at him for the nickname but answers, “Dare.” It’s a rare thing, Sam almost always picks truth. He’s asking for trouble. 

But Gabriel’s eyes almost look like they’re glowing as he says, “You have to kiss one of us, with tongue.”

Sam turns to Dean who shakes his head and says, “Dude…no.”

So he turns to Castiel only to have Dean grab his shoulder and bark, “Dude, No!” 

So Gabriel it is then, and Sam now has the answer to why Castiel had the underwear. Dean’s sicker than he thought. 

So he slides over, leans down, angles his head and tries not to moan as Gabriel parts his lips and kisses him like it might be the only chance he ever has to get a taste of Sam. When it’s over moments later, Sam’s hard as a rock and Gabriel shaking. 

Interesting. 

The next morning while they’re doing the dishes alone in the kitchen Sam announces, “I have a question for you.”

Gabriel drops a plate into the sink, wincing as it cracks. He turns to Sam with his jaw clenched. 

“It wasn’t just a dare, you wanted to kiss me?” 

Gabriel backs up into the corner of the cabinet and answers, “Yes.” 

He closes his eyes then, like he’s waiting for a punch. 

“You want to do it again?” Sam asks, watching as Gabriel swallows again like he did the night before. 

“All the time.” Gabriel’s clinging to the countertop now. 

Sam steps closer, plastering his long body up against Gabriel’s smaller one while Gabriel makes a squeak noise and squirms. 

“You want to belong to me, Gabriel?” 

“Yes,” Gabriel whispers before adding even more softly, “Please.” 

Sam’s on him then, dragging him closer, tilting his head up to kiss him breathless while Gabriel clings to him. 

When they break apart to breathe Sam doesn’t miss the way the smaller man snuggles into his chest. “See,” he whispers into the top of Gabriel’s head. “The truth will set you free.”


	35. Kiss 35: Zeppelin – The penguin From 50 First Dates – Date 20.

Title: Kiss 35  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 773  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Zeppelin – The penguin From 50 First Dates – Date 20. 

Kiss 35

He can’t find her.

Lost in a sea of black and white his little baby bird is missing. 

Dean’s freaking out. He knows she can’t actually get out of the zoo or out of the building, the worst thing that has probably happened is that Gabriel forgot to put the food slot lid down all the way again and she shoved it open and took off exploring. 

This little, itty bitty penguin is way more trouble than she’s worth sometimes. 

Well, not really, Dean loves her and though he won’t say it out loud everyone knows his little Zeppelin is his favorite. 

He just sort of wishes the feeling were mutual. 

She has a favorite human all right, it’s just not Dean. 

Though he has to give it to her, she has awesome taste in men. 

He checks the food slot and, of course, it’s open again. Most penguins don’t pay it any attention because they couldn’t fit through the hole it makes if they tried. But Zeppy is small, and she does this thing to compress her body so she can almost fit through anything her head will go through. 

She’s been stuck a few times…it wasn’t pretty. 

Once he realizes she’s out, it’s not hard to know where to find her. 

Dean wanders down the hallway to what makes up Castiel’s office and smiles as he hears her squawking through the doorway. She doesn’t say a lot around the other penguins, but get her around Castiel and she just can’t shut up. She squeaks and screeches and Castiel comments on her warbling like she’s making perfect sense to him. It has Dean chuckling as he pushes open the door to slip inside. Castiel notices him immediately and gives him a small but welcoming smile. Dean waves at him with a wink and then smiles bigger when Castiel’s pale cheeks color in reaction to the silent, but utterly heartfelt flirting. 

They’re….dating, sort of. 

It’s a mess, really. Their schedules are out of whack and they’re both really careful. Dean’s been burned before, hard core and he has reason to think maybe Castiel has as well. If those weren’t good enough reasons, they work together, and have nothing in common but a love of a tiny, loud-mouthed penguin. 

He knows the second Zeppy sees him. She rushes toward Castiel and slings her little flippers around his leg as if to beg him not to let Dean take her away. Castiel sighs, bends to pick her up and press her against his chest. She snuggles close as Dean approaches and Castiel kisses her almost reverently on the top of her head. 

They’re standing so close Dean’s shoulder bumps him as Castiel transfers his bundle into Dean’s arms. 

Zep leans out and places her beak against Castiel’s lips until he makes a kissing noise. 

“She kisses you?” Dean asks, startled. 

“Yes,” Castiel murmurs as he pets her slick feathers. “It’s new this week.” 

She leans back into Dean and repeats the gesture until he makes a similar noise. He flushes at the idea of kissing a penguin but then she taps Castiel with her beak and then Dean, then Castiel again, then Dean. 

“I believe she thinks we should kiss as well,” Castiel comments. 

Dean’s eyes widen as he looks at Castiel shocked and then back down to Zep. “We haven’t really gotten that far, Kiddo.” He whispers to the penguin. 

The next round of tapping has more force behind it. It kind of hurts. 

“Okay,” Dean huffs as he shifts the bird to step closer. “Okay?” he asks just in case Castiel’s against the idea of kissing him to please a penguin. 

“Yes, please,” Castiel’s breath just a ghost across Dean’s lips as he closes his eyes and leans in, his lips pressing against the edges of Castiel’s mouth before a sharp, hard beak shoves in between them and Zeppelin makes a noise close to a ‘coo’ of happiness. 

Dean jerks away irritated, Castiel is clearly as ruffled. “I thought that would go differently,” he comments before he blushes again like he let something slip. 

“You taught her to kiss,” Dean accuses. “You planned this!” 

Castiel shrugs before turning back to his work. 

Dean turns to head back to the enclosure, hugging Zeppy close and whispering, “You’re such a good girl!”


	36. Kiss 36: Slow Burn

Title: Slow Burn  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 4,872  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Slow Burn

Kiss 36

Dean didn’t like him at first. 

His new partner was weird, cold and impersonal. Castiel Novak stood out against the stark outline of the other new recruits in the docking bay of the shuttle station, completely out of place; instead of a uniform he had on an oversized tan tunic. His boots weren’t polished; his hair was sticking up everywhere. Most importantly, though: none of the other newbies were talking to him. That more than anything told Dean how off the guy must be. 

Space is a scary place, big and lonely. The new guys always flock together. 

Dean has learned to love space. He hates flying, always has, but something about the cool stream of slipping into the pod and letting your soul slip out to shoot across the galaxy is a comfort to him. 

Sam thinks he’s nuts. Sam and his entourage of politicians.

The problem with Pooling, as the pilots have chosen to call it, is that it’s a two man experience. Dean is not exactly a two man kind of guy. He’s on his fifth Guide this year and his captain has finally told him if he can’t make it work with the new guy then Dean is grounded. Captain Singer even told him it didn’t matter anymore that Dean is the best Conduit they have. 

The first few times they pool it’s rough. The joining of Conduits to Guides requires a certain level of intimacy, or better yet, affection. Dean has nothing but a bad feeling about Castiel, and Castiel doesn’t seem to feel anything at all in return. 

Dean Pools in too early, causing his body to seize. Castiel yanks him out too late, forcing him to share the same symptoms. 

It takes them weeks of trying, fighting, blaming, before they finally get it right. 

Dean has missed being out here so much. 

It’s not until he’s sweeping through an asteroid belt, formless and free, soul held to his body only by Castiel’s still somewhat eerily silent presence at the back of his consciousness, that Dean feels a spark of what he can only call wonder from his Guide.

Wonder, and possibly fear. 

They can’t talk to each other like this, part of the reason why learning each other has been so difficult and why Guides and Conduits often never leave one another once they’re partnered up. They have to learn to feel each other's souls in the emptiness of space for Pooling to work. 

He and Castiel haven’t learned each other yet, not at all, but he pulses back reassurance and hopes it comes through. Dean is a pro at this; he’s so much better at this than he is at being in his body. He wants Castiel to trust him. 

His Guide’s presence settles against his again, more firmly this time, and Dean shoots off to the next star hoping to show something wonderful to Castiel, something that will make his new Guide understand why they have to make this work. 

Dean can’t lose this. 

He tries to smother the sadness he feels when Castiel’s soul, still linked to his, tugs him home. Dean thinks Castiel felt some of it anyway, though, because along his being he feels something, nothing he’s ever felt before. It's like what Singer once described as a soul’s kiss. 

He doesn’t get a chance to explore it; the pod is opening and Dean awakens, shooting up all wired and full of energy like every time he comes home. 

Castiel looks shaken, his eyes tired, clearly exhausted. It’s odd enough that Dean checks the clock on his pod and realizes he’s been gone half a day instead of their planned hour. 

“Why?” Dean questions gruffly. Pooling might energize a Conduit, but it wears the Guides out. 

“It had been so long,” Castiel shrugs. “You were joyful and…I’ve never been out except in simulations. It was amazing.” 

Maybe this guy’s not so bad after all. 

Dean’s just going to have to see. 

*****

They’re nine months into their year long partnership; the parties that rule over the fleet require each Guide and Conduit pair to make a year long commitment prior to formally accepting a joining.

It’s not _that_ serious. Dean has been through four other trial years before this thing he has with Cas began. None of them amounted to anything but anger and rejection. Dean just moved onto the next. He never really cared about any of it, just went on to the next Guide, just wanted to get back to the Pooling, where he belongs. 

But this time, Dean is getting nervous. By nine months into his previous partnerships he and his Guide already knew they hated each other. Dean was well aware that at the end of the trial period he was going to be getting a new Guide. 

He doesn’t want a new Guide this time. He wants Castiel. The problem is that Dean hasn't got a damned clue what Castiel wants: the guy never says anything about it. It’s like he doesn’t give a damn, and if he doesn’t care that their time together is getting shorter and shorter then Dean has to assume that Castiel isn’t happy with his performance. 

Maybe this time it’s Dean who will be getting replaced. 

The idea of it eats at him. He turns it over again and again in his head. Dean has never given a lot of thought to joining with someone. He’s always known it was part of the job, so in the long run he figured it was coming. He had hoped to find a Guide that was tolerable. He hadn’t counted on falling for the awkward, reserved Castiel. 

And he _has_ fallen for him. Dean Winchester, Casanova of the republic fleet, in love like a teenage girl. With a guy that probably doesn’t even notice him outside of their friendship and working relationship, no less. 

Dean’s got no idea how to broach the subject; words have never really been his strong point. 

“Dean?” Castiel’s voice so close to him gives Dean the shivers. “Are you well?”

Of course Cas would be worried. Dean has been sitting here in front of him at dinner staring off into nothing with his fork halfway to his mouth for who knows how long.

“I’m fine, Cas.” Dean goes for a grin and can tell immediately by the look on his friend’s face that it falls flat. “I was just thinking about tomorrow.” It’s a lie. Dean is thinking of another day many months in the future. 

“You’re concerned about our Pooling the Gulf?” Castiel asks, head tilting slightly to the side as he assesses Dean with narrowed blue eyes. “I assure you, I’m well prepared.” 

“No shit,” Dean snorts. “Like you’re ever _not_ prepared.” 

It’s a long standing joke between them. For as much as Dean likes to literally fly by the seat of his pants, Castiel has to be the most planned out Guide in the fleet. They’re still learning how to balance each other in that area, but it’s one of those topics that’s become more of a joke between them than a cause for conflict. 

“There _are_ things I’m not yet ready to deal with,” Castiel answers cryptically. Dean doesn’t get the chance to ask him what he means, because Cas gets up and goes to turn his tray in, waving at him as he walks out the door and into the dim corridor outside of the ship’s dining hall. 

Dean stares at his empty place at the table for a long time. 

When Dean slips out of his body as part of the Pooling process the next morning, he gets his first moment of peace about the whole joining issue in days. With Castiel’s presence snuggled in tight at the back of his awareness Dean can’t even consider that his partner wouldn’t want to do this forever; they fit perfectly here despite all their weirdness while in their bodies. 

Dean has never felt closer to someone than he feels to Castiel when they Pool, their souls sent out into the wide empty surroundings of space to explore. They’re the best team in their rank and class. They’ve been called upon to go on a number of explorations, this one being to a place called “The Gulf;” a deep, dark expanse of space where nothing seems to exist. The fleet has been studying it for decades, not able to discover much from long range explorations, so Pooling was decided to be the best option. 

Dean and Cas have been planning and practicing for weeks now, and as Dean’s spirit slips closer to the edge of the blackened area he can feel Cas shift and squirm against him through their bond. Dean can feel his Guide’s nervous excitement; sometimes it’s easy for him to forget that while Pooling is something he’s done for years, Cas was fresh off the simulators at the training academy when they first met. 

He pulses warmth and support back to his guide through their link and ripples with happiness as Castiel returns the gesture. Castiel touches places inside of Dean he’s never shown to anyone else. It’s with that thought that he enters the empty place in space; knowing Castiel has his back, trusting his Guide to bring him home. 

*****

Dean wakes to the sound of alarms and Castiel’s panicked face hovering over him. His Guide is shaking all over, dripping sweat, and they’re half in and half out of the pod they share for Pooling, Dean draped across the floor as Castiel clings to him. 

“What happened?” Dean gasps. He hears the medical team running toward them, their boots banging against the metal flooring. 

“Are you alright?” Castiel questions as his freezing cold fingers cup and smooth over Dean’s face like he’s trying to memorize it. “Are you with me?”

“I’m fine,” Dean huffs, shoving Castiel off him and struggling to a sitting position before the doctors strap him to some kind of gurney because they think something’s wrong with him. “Tell me what happened?!” 

“You were gone.” Castiel chokes out, curling in on himself like he’s lost and cold. “We Pooled into the Gulf and you were gone, our connection was gone, I was out there alone, I couldn’t find you. It took me hours to make it back to the ship. I couldn’t find my way back into my body without you. One minute I was trapped out there, the next I was back inside. You woke up, just now, like nothing had happened.”

Dean doesn’t remember anything after slipping into the darkness. “How long?” he asks, even as he's diving back into the pod to check the sensors. The clock doesn’t lie. 

They were gone nine hours. 

Dean only remembers fifteen minutes of the Pool. 

He’s not shocked when they’re grounded; not surprised at the guarded stares he gets from the rest of the ship's crew as he makes his way slowly to his cabin to begin the three day bed rest the medical staff ordered for both he and Castiel. What does get to him is the almost too quiet swish of his cabin door an hour later as Castiel breaks into his rooms, slips through his apartment in the darkness, and crawls into bed beside him. 

“You disappeared,” Castiel whispers just as Dean almost slips into sleep. Dean reaches out to trace along Castiel’s cloth covered arm in the darkness. He tangles their fingers together under the sheet as he tugs Cas closer, settles his friend more firmly against his body. 

“I’m here now,” he whispers back. 

It’s a long time before either of them sleep. 

*****

“Fuck!” Dean snarls as the medics stab him with yet another needle. “I’m not a pin cushion. Let me up.” 

“Let them finish,” Castiel orders, his hand settling firmly against Dean’s arm. It’s not a tone Dean is used to from his Guide. Castiel is usually the quiet one when it comes to being out in public, but the situation is different this time. 

This time, for the first time, Dean is going against everything his friend has asked of him. He’s going back out there, back into the Gulf. He has to know what happened to them. 

It’s been two weeks of observation and testing, and Dean still draws a total blank for the whole of the event. The only way they’re going to know if this thing is dangerous is to give it another shot. Castiel is not sold on the idea, doesn’t want to risk it again. 

On some level Dean is aware that he’s being pigheaded, but that’s never stopped him before. 

Finally cleared, two hours later, he slips into the front area of the pod, the part designed for Conduits, and settles back waiting for Castiel to be hooked up as his Guide. The shell shuts down over them with a hiss and the air pressurizes just like normal. Dean closes his eyes and inhales deeply, sliding free of his body and out into the welcoming arms of space. It's like coming home. 

Castiel’s presence is less comforting now, and clingier. His Guide feels like a thousand pound weight tied to his back. Dean does his best to project comfort and a feeling of security. Castiel pumps back with something that feels like maybe his Guide thinks he’s being an idiot. Dean shoves back with irritation, and Cas slams back at him with frustration and fear. 

It’s the fear that shoves Dean over the edge of being even remotely reasonable. They’re just reaching the edge of the Gulf when he gets angry; it’s like Castiel doesn’t trust him, like he’s trying to drag Dean back to the ship before they even get started. Dean slams out aggravation and anger at his Guide. It’s sharp and sudden and Dean can tell from the stunned feeling of Castiel’s soul that it must have been the spiritual equivalent of being punched in the face. He wants to sooth, wants to reach out to offer some kind of comfort but Castiel withdraws into himself, only hanging onto Dean by the thinnest of connections. 

It's a feeling Dean has experienced before, with his previous Guides. It’s how they touched him toward the end of their partnerships, like Dean’s soul was something distasteful and ugly. He turns and dives for the breach of the gulf without hesitation. He never wanted Castiel to touch him that way. 

The blackness closes around them…

And Dean wakes up in the pod, once again to the sound of alarms and the pounding feet of the medical staff. Only this time they aren’t coming for him, they’re coming for Castiel. 

*****

“Wake up,” Dean begs with a voice now hoarse from hours of pleading. “Please, wake up for me.” 

Castiel’s pale, sleeping face doesn’t twitch even as Dean traces along the tiny lines next to his eyes. Brain-dead they say; the medical staff ran every diagnostic they could on the comatose Guide while Dean paced and screamed and demanded they run them again and again. 

Now it’s just the two of them, off in the corner of the sick ward. Castiel’s body is covered by too thin a blanket, don’t they know he gets cold? Dean sits on the platform bed next to his friend and wills him to wake up with every bit of strength left in his soul. 

It’s no use. 

“Please,” Dean croaks out before leaning down and pressing his face into Castiel’s neck as he sobs. He doesn’t care who hears him, doesn’t care if the whole universe stops right now, because he lost Cas. He lost everything. 

“Please, don’t let this be how we end.” 

Dean never hears the nurse approach him, almost doesn’t feel the hiss of the injector before whatever they gave him knocks him out cold. 

*****

_Have you gotten your answer?_

Dean slams back into wakefulness in his quarters; his eyes dart around the room in momentary panic until he knows where he is. The strangest feeling of Pooling hangs onto him as he comes out of his dream and he’s never felt that before. 

He’s struggling to get up, headed for the medical wing, to Cas, when Singer’s voice rings out from the foot of his bed, “He’s still sleeping. Don’t worry, son, no one is going to hurt him.” 

“I already did,” Dean answers before he thinks about what he’s planning to say. The lights come up slowly around them and Dean’s eyes turn warily towards his Captain. 

“I don’t know what you think you did, Dean,” Singer sighs as he gets up out of the chair in the corner. “But I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think.” 

“What if he’s lost out there?” Dean breathes out the thing that’s been eating at him since he woke up. 

“In space?” 

“Last time, he said he couldn’t find his way back to his body without me,” Dean swallows the sickening twist in his gut at the idea. “With me in here, what if he’s lost out there trying to get back in?” 

“Guides can’t do that, Dean,” Singer answers sadly. “You know that. Only Conduits really Pool. Without you Castiel can’t survive in the in-between. Neither can Conduits for that matter, it’s why you’re paired.” 

“Don’t you think I know that?” Dean snarls. “But nothing makes sense about the Gulf. What if that’s what happened? I need to go back out there, Bobby. I need to go get him.” 

“Absolutely not,” Captain Singer snaps. “You won’t make it through the Pooling processes without a Guide with you and there’s no way Castiel’s brain-dead body sitting in the back of that pod counts.” 

“He’s _not_ brain-dead,” Dean growls as his body shakes. “Don’t you ever say that to me again. You get the hell out.” 

Dean watches with bleary eyes as his Captain takes his leave. That’s the problem with space travel: no doors to slam when you need them. Everything is so fucking automated. 

*****

Dean spends most of the next eight days either at Castiel’s bedside or arguing violently with anyone and everyone who will pause long enough to listen. He needs to get back out, back to the pod, back to the Gulf, back to Cas. 

The problem is no one believes him. Dean barely eats, runs himself down until he physically can’t make his body go anymore and falls into dreams that make no sense. 

_Have you gotten your answer?_

He doesn’t even know the fucking question. But it feels like he should, feels like he’s missing something huge pressed right into the back of his brain where Cas lives when they Pool together. 

He’s dropping the ball, can’t see the clues, fucking it all up, just like his father used to say he would. 

Dean is falling apart. 

“You look worse than he said you would.”

Dean whirls on his heels and looks up, up, up, into his little brother’s face. 

“Sam?” Sam, the politician, the good kid, the one with big goals and a bright future, standing in the doorway. “Why are you here?”

“Bobby sent for me,” Sam says as he walks across the room toward Castiel’s bed. “Said you needed me.” 

Dean turns back to the still form on the bed at his side and can’t stop himself from whispering, “He won’t wake up, Sammy.” 

When Sam takes the rest of the room in three huge strides and wraps his extra long arms around him, Dean collapses, turns into his brother’s embrace and lets Sam guide him to somewhere more private. Then he retells the whole story, from start to finish and waits for his brother’s response. 

“You love him?” Sam asks. 

“I tell you I think a giant black cloud in space kidnapped my partner’s soul and all you want to know is if I love him?” Dean snaps. 

Sam just gives him the puppy eyes and waits, the shit. 

“Yeah,” Dean sighs. “I do. Just never got the balls to tell him, and now…”

He trails off, waiting for Sam to shove him in the shoulder and tell him it’s time to move on, or that Cas is in a better place, or some shit like what the rest of the people on board this rust bucket have been feeding him. That’s not what happens. 

“Okay,” Sam shrugs as he puts down his coffee and takes off his jacket. “Let’s do this thing then.” 

Dean is sure he’s gone crazy. “What?” 

“Look, Dean,” Sam says as he heads for the door. “You’re my brother, all the family I have. You’re also the best damn Conduit the Republic has. So if you say your Guide is out there and you think you can bring him back then I’m going to help you. Besides, I want you to be happy, you deserve it.” 

Okay, so Sam’s pretty awesome. Dean owes him a hell of an awesome birthday gift this year. “Sam…”

“Don’t say it.” 

So he doesn’t, he just follows his brother back to the medical ward where Cas is still and silent and gathers up his friend. After that it’s just a mad rush down suspiciously empty hallways to the pod deck. “No one’s trying to stop us,” Dean hisses as the doors slide shut behind them. 

“Yeah.” Sam smiles as he helps Dean settle Castiel’s body into his portion of the pod. “Bobby called in a few favors.” 

“He told me I was crazy,” Dean comments as he fits himself into position. 

“He told me we were both crazy,” Sam chuckles. “But he’s family.” 

It’s easy for Dean to remember now, why he never accepted a transfer to a bigger, better station. He never wanted to leave Captain Singer behind, already too far from Sam to have Bobby out there on his own too. 

“Sammy,” Dean starts as his brother gets ready to shut the lid to the pod. “Look, I’m not sure how this is going to do down. Cas usually leads me through it and he’s not exactly here right now. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but don’t open the lid, no matter what.” 

“Or what?” Sam asks with a look on his face that says Dean better come up with a good answer or Sam might do it anyway. 

“Or you’ll fry us both for good.” Dean meets his gaze, lets his brother know he’s telling the truth. Good or bad, once he starts there’s no way to stop it. 

Sam nods, slams the lid shut and puts his too huge hand on the glass. Dean reaches up to press against the other side when the first wave of pain hits him. He groans, eyes closing as he tries to ride it out. He’s used to the easy slip slide of warmth as he goes into the Pool, used to Cas’ soul sliding along his as they settle together. This is nothing like that. He screams as it starts to feel like he’s being electrocuted; all of his nerve-endings lighting up with fire as the pain amplifies again and again. It’s not until darkness is touching the edges of his vision that something starts changing, the world around him blurring and shifting. 

Dean might not make it; everything is going to end here. 

Then he’s free, out in the open expanse but still wracked with pain. It’s not right, he can’t focus, feels too much, distracted. Without Castiel to focus him Dean has to struggle just to hold himself together, never mind move towards his goal. He’s nothing if not determined, though, and while it takes him so much longer than he had counted on, Dean finally makes his way to the edge of the Gulf. He throws himself head first into the blackness with all that he is, only to find himself back on the outside. 

He tries again, and again. 

Nothing changes. Dean had thought this would hold all of the answers, that if he got this far then he would find Cas and bring him home. But now, he can’t even get inside. 

He curls in on himself, bleeding out pain, loss, and grief. He’s not even going to try to get back to the ship, doesn’t have it in him. This is it for him. 

_Have you gotten your answer?_

That damned disconnected voice is sounding in his head even though there’s no voice in space. And then Dean hears Castiel answer, _Yes._

And then he’s there, Cas’ soul sliding back against his like they’ve never been separated. Dean has never felt anything so good, so right. He pushes out everything he’s held in for so long, his hope, his love, his fears about Castiel not wanting him, and finds so much of his own feelings returned. 

_Such strange beings,_ the voice sounds again. _The Conduit so concerned the other won’t stay, and the same reversed for the Guide. You’ve gained a greater understanding of one another now?_

_Yes, we have,_ Castiel answers. 

_Then you’re ready for the next step?_

Dean wants to ask what the hell they mean, but the sweet-hot blast of longing that comes from his Guide stills him, makes him ache. _Please._ Castiel sounds desperate. 

_Then, it is done._ The voice says warmly inside Dean’s soul. _It’s time for celebration. Be merry. You have earned it._

Dean looses focus for a moment and the next thing he knows he’s jerking awake inside the pod, turning to grab for his partner seated behind him and finds himself staggered as Castiel gets to him first. They land in a pile of limbs inside Dean’s area of the pod. Dean opens his mouth to ask what just happened and finds himself being kissed instead. 

A joyous jumble of Castiel’s feelings tumble through their link; a link that never existed before now outside of their time spent Pooling. Dean doesn’t really mind, too distracted by the man in his arms and the taste of Castiel on his lips to care. 

They can sort the rest out later. 

*****

One day Dean is going to calculate the number of hours he has spent in the medical ward and realize it’s over half his adult life. 

“So you’re telling me that a giant space alien cloud decided to play matchmaker for us and then married our souls?” 

Dean knows it sounds insane even as he says it, but he’s still shocked by the little burst of mirth that erupts from his link with Castiel. The other man is sitting stone-faced on the exam table across the room from him. But clearly, he’s enjoying this conversation. 

Seems like Dean still has a whole lot to learn about his partner after all. 

“It would appear that would be the case,” Castiel answers, the corner of his mouth quirking up in a tiny grin. 

Dean can’t take it. He gets to his feet maybe a little too suddenly for the comfort of the medical staff that he’s been yelling at for over a week now. He’s probably going to have to buy them all dinner or something later to make up for how he acted while Cas was away. They quickly back off from their examination, like wild animals, skittish and afraid. 

Dean crosses the room to where Castiel sits watching, steps between his Guide’s legs and wraps his arms around Castiel’s body, enjoying how the other man sighs and immediately leans against him, Cas’ arms sliding around his hips as he buries his face in Dean’s neck. 

“I thought maybe you didn’t want to join with me,” Dean whispers into Castiel’s ear and shares the warmth of the other man’s embarrassment as Castiel answers with, “I had the same concern about you.” 

“We’re pretty pathetic,” Dean snorts as he runs this hand down Castiel’s back. The nurses creep closer and Dean’s shocked to feel aggravation, frustration, and possessiveness coming through from Cas in their bond. Cas must have felt his confusion because his Guide shifts against him restlessly and murmurs, “I want them to leave us alone.” 

Dean discovers that the first draw back of this whole bonding thing is that Cas experiences Dean’s hot blast of arousal at the idea of what they could do together, alone, just a moment after Dean does. His cheeks flame red and he ducks his head in shame until he feels a similar response from his Guide. 

“I want you,” Castiel says softly. One of the nurses nearby must have heard them because she drops one of the instruments to the ground. “I love you.” 

“Yeah,” Dean smiles as he feels the warmth of Castiel’s love. “I know. I love you, too.” 

Castiel’s smile is blinding. “I’m aware.” 

Dean can’t do anything but kiss him then. In the background he hears the nurses applaud and the doctor groan. He knows there will be meeting upon meeting about this, and for the next year he and Castiel will live under a microscope. But he doesn’t care. They’ll live together, and that’s all he really cares about. 

He’s finally found his partner, and nothing else really matters at all.


	37. Kiss 37: Priorities or Coming Home

Title: Kiss 37  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 514  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – priorities or coming home

Kiss 37

Castiel never goes out with the guys after work. 

He has better things to do. 

Castiel smiles and waves as he watches them wander off together toward the nearest bar, all of them holding off time before they go home to their families, most of them complaining about what their children or spouses are asking them to do around the house. 

He thinks they’re all idiots. 

Castiel checks his watch and hisses in irritation, the meeting ran over this afternoon and they got off of work late. He’s going to have to hustle or he might miss it. 

And missing it is absolutely not an option; it’s the best part of his whole day. 

He rushes to the subway, taps his foot while he waits for the train and them dives for it as soon as the doors open. By the time they make it to his stop he’s almost quivering with excitement. 

He throws out all sense of decorum and flat out runs from the station to their too small, over priced, extra crapped, little apartment. 

After fumbling with his keys and uncharacteristically cursing his boss and the keys and the world in general for everything going so damned slowly the last twenty minutes, he finally gets inside and breathes a sigh of relief that the lights are all still off. 

He hasn’t missed it. 

He toes off his shoes and drops his coat on the floor next to him. He’ll get teased later for being in such a hurry but he doesn’t care right now, he’s goal focused, Castiel’s priorities are clear. 

He’s shoving the door open to the bedroom while he smiles and it’s like a weight is lifted off his shoulders when he sees his lover still curled up, sleeping in the center of their bed. 

This is the one good thing about Dean getting put on the night shift for the next two months. 

Castiel makes it home from work in just enough time to kiss him awake. 

They’re both almost constantly missing each other, and for all that they try the little notes inside lunch boxed and texts throughout the day, the occasional snuck phone call from work. It doesn’t matter, it’s not the same as lazy evenings curled up under a soft, warm blanket on the sofa while Dean yells at the game and Castiel reads. 

The sun is setting, Castiel needs to get a move on of Dean will be late. 

He creeps into the bed and presses himself up against his lover. Dean responds evening his sleep to tip his head over searching blindly for Castiel’s mouth. 

Their lips touch, Dean slowly wakes under Castiel’s tender attentions. 

Sure he had to rush, but it’s worth it to have the first thing Dean’s aware of be his kiss.


	38. Kiss 38: Cat Adoption

Title: Kiss 38  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 698  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – cat adoption

Kiss 38

“He’s a cat,” Sam says sort of accusingly. 

“I know,” Dean sighs while he rubs his hand back and forth over his face. 

“You hate cats,” Sam points out. He’s being totally unhelpful. 

“I’m aware of that, Sam,” Dean hisses because, fuck, the last thing he needs is for the damned cat to hear them. “It’s not exactly like I had a choice, you know?” 

“But he’s a cat.” Sam’s pointing now, like he’s being helpful and pointing out something Dean doesn’t already know. 

After all, the giant, black, pointy eared, long tailed, slightly furry, panther like familiar sitting in his window seat glaring down at the city isn’t exactly inconspicuous. 

“Fuck off,” Dean blurts a little too loudly, one of the familiar’s ears twitch in response. 

“I just thought you would come home with something else,” Sam sounds stunned.

Dean thought the same thing too, getting chosen for a familiar was a rare honor and Dean had worked hard getting through the ranks of scryers to get to this point. To be considered special enough to be given the help of a mythical being. 

Some familiars are ghosts, some take the form of animals, they can look like anything really, and are notoriously finicky about those whom they choose to bond themselves to. Dean had expected the whole process to be a bit of a struggle, he’s not from a known blood line, he’s not formally trained, and seeing the future is a rare talent, one not frequently respected due to the nature of timelines and the impacts of change. 

He had entered the ceremony space expecting to be rejected numerous times; it’s sort of how Dean’s life has gone. 

But then the human sized man/cat thing had stepped forward, whiskers twitching, tail thrashing and growled out, “This one shall be mine.”

And Dean found himself sitting in the car with a blue eyed, man/cat thing strapped in the passenger seat looking a little irritated. 

And now he’s home, and a little scared, and totally uncertain as to what to do.

His familiar is a little standoffish and kind of disappointing, being that they are supposed to be doing the big bonding thing right now. This was supposed to be the first and last real relationship of Dean’s life. 

Instead the cat’s being…well…cat like. 

Dean goes to bed, head pounding, with fears that he’s made a horrible mistake. 

He wakes in the middle of the night, covered with sweat from a horrible dream of a possible future. 

He’s not in bed alone. 

“You got a name?” he croaks out as he wipes tears from his eyes. 

“Castiel,” his familiar answers with a rumble and as Dean turns the name around in his mind it’s like he’s known it forever, like it’s always been there waiting for him to find it. 

Castiel’s taken off his pants clearly, from the amount of warm fur now pressing against Dean’s body as the cat curls closer. 

Dean’s not sure why he lets Castiel pull him close. But the purring settles his nerves as it vibrates his way through his chest. 

Castiel’s actually smaller than Dean, he realizes as they tangle together, Dean turning toward his familiar in an instinctive move for comfort. 

Soft fur lining the toned muscle of a runners frame as Castiel tails wraps around his leg. 

“I am not what you were expecting,” Castiel says softly before licking at the sweat gathered in the hair near Dean’s ear. 

His tongue is rough. 

He sounds like he suspects Dean is disappointed. 

Dean drags his kitty shaped head down and presses a kiss to the spot between Castiel’s wonderously blue eyes. “Maybe not,” he manages to get out through the lump in his throat. “But you’re what I needed.” 

Castiel’s purr gets louder as he makes biscuits against Dean’s back. 

Dean slips into the first dreamless sleep he’s had in his life. 

Kiss 38 continuation

Castiel has never wanted to be a familiar. 

The bonding process between his magical people and the humans is no mystery to him; he’s stood witness to countless numbers of his brethren falling all over themselves to bond with those that call themselves scryers. 

He’s seen what those bonds can do when they aren’t respected. He’s seen his people suffer at the hands of those they supposedly belong with. 

In his mind, being a familiar is more like being a slave than being a partner. Castiel would rather die than be someone’s slave. He’s voiced his growing concerns loudly, the debates amongst his people harsh and aggressive, questioning his loyalty. It cuts Castiel to the bone. He loves his people. 

It’s the humans he can’t bring himself to trust. 

Castiel heeds the call to the next joining. It gives him an opportunity to speak to more of his people about the things that need changing in the bonding process. 

It’s not that he wants to deny his people the right to serve, or that he’s unwilling himself. He just wants some things to change. 

Castiel barely pays attention as they announce the potentials. A handful of humans deemed worthy of seeking their companionship. 

One is a teller of fortunes, another a healer, the third a magic dealer, followed by a levitator. They’re of good blood, families long associated with his kind and groomed in their own way for what’s about the come. He can sense the crowd’s excitement. They’re expecting quite a competition, for only one can be chosen this day. It seems the fifth participant is already being rejected on his bloodline alone. 

Castiel pauses in his travels through the crowd as he hears murmurs of the last one having the gift of foresight. 

It is a rare talent, a powerful gift. Castiel has only seen one other scryer with this gift in the whole of his very long life. 

It’s curiosity more than anything that makes him ask for the man’s name. 

He should have known better. Curiosity always has been the downfall of cats. 

“Dean Winchester,” Lucifer tells him with a shrug. “Pity, he’ll never be chosen. He’s formidable, but foresight is such a delicate gift. Frustratingly so.”

Castiel only hears the name, echoing in his head over and over like he’s known it forever, even though it’s only just been spoken to him. His whiskers twitch, his fur stands on end, and he has to fight the urge to drop down onto all fours and run. 

It’s not possible, a spontaneous bonding hasn’t happened in as long as he can remember. It’s something romanticized in books and fairytales. 

It’s not real, not happening to him. 

But the draw is irresistible. He finds himself turning toward the fire-lit circle of potentials until he’s face to face with this man whose soul has clamped down so firmly on his own. He’s young, but not as young as the others he stands separate from; the other potentials are barely out of childhood. His eyes are guarded, lips pressed tightly together. 

Dean Winchester is beautiful, even without the heady scent Castiel is already memorizing from just being near him, even without the swirl of otherworldly energy shifting around them both as the link between them strengthens. 

It will take time for it to reach it’s full potential, but the bond is clear and true. 

“This one will be mine,” Castiel speaks the words of claiming without hesitation. This is not the plan he had for himself, but if the fates have given him to this human there must be a reason. Castiel will not try to refuse. 

His human looks as shocked as he feels. 

His human, Dean Winchester. His. 

Perhaps Castiel had not fully understood the nature of this bond when he was doubting it. 

There’s a sweet pulse of possessive satisfaction as his human blushes. 

The ceremony finishes quickly, and Castiel finds himself in a contraption called a “car.” His still fragile link with his human leads him to believe it has more meaning than just transportation, though. 

It cramps his tail and makes him sick to his stomach. 

His human asks him nothing; Castiel smells a hint of fear in him as they enter his apartment and Castiel slinks to the window to look out over the city that will now be his home. He's never chosen to travel the human world as some of the others have done. It’s very new to him, somehow larger than he suspected it would be. 

Castiel is expecting a welcome, perhaps a discussion on sleeping arrangements, or food. 

He’s heard whispers of this deep and meaningful moment between scryers and their familiars. 

It’s not happening. Instead he gets Sam, his human’s brother, who smells…wrong somehow and clearly dislikes not just Castiel’s presence, but his shape, and his mere existence on the planet. 

It stings when Dean reveals that he also finds Castiel’s form displeasing. This is Castiel’s truest nature, him at his most open and exposed. 

It’s an honor to see him like this. He’s tempted to change, but then it would allow the humans to know he was listening. 

He clamps down on a growl working its way up his throat and instead focuses his energies inward, closing his eyes and drifting on a spiritual plane. 

By the time Dean’s spike of fear pulls him back to his body it’s dark outside, and Castiel follows a sense of wrongness along their link to Dean’s room. 

His scryer is having a vision, a terrifying one involving blood and pain, the senseless torture of a familiar of all things. His human dreams the future, and he’s upset by harm brought to one of Castiel’s people. 

Castiel’s heart warms. He slips out of his clothing, too hot in his fur inside the apartment anyway, to climb into bed beside his human. Dean wakes briefly, the link between them glowing brightly with his relief at not being alone. 

“You got a name?” Dean asks. 

When he answers, “Castiel,” he feels Dean’s own possessive satisfaction mirrored back at him through their bond, and it causes Castiel to purr. 

“I’m not what you were expecting,” Castiel growls out softly into the night. He’s embarrassed by his need for reassurance. It shouldn’t matter to him if this man approves of him or not. 

But he _does_ approve, and his sweet words to that effect melt whatever reservations Castiel may have had about this bonding. The kiss makes Castiel’s heart soar. 

He weaves a pattern of protection around his human and keeps watch as Dean slips into a dreamless, visionless sleep. 

****

Dean wakes up confused, with a mouthful of fur and a raging erection. 

Somehow, the tail wrapped around his leg only makes it worse. 

So do the blue eyes watching him with interest. 

“Umm…” Dean swallows, blinks, and prays this is all a dream. “Good morning?”

“You claim to not appreciate my feline qualities,” Castiel comments with a flick of his ear. “Yet you spend the whole of our night in bed together rubbing yourself against my fur. I find you very confusing.”

Dean groans. It might be possible for a human to die of embarrassment, but it’s probably a slow death. 

“I’m so sorry,” he finally manages to force out. He throws an arm over his eyes so at least he won’t see it coming when Castiel uses his claws to gut him. 

Then Dean gets hung up on the name again and how good it feels to think it. 

Castiel. 

That twisting heat low down in his gut isn’t going to help with his erection _at all._

“I’m not offended,” Castiel assures him, before almost purring as he performs this obscene stretch that makes Dean want to pant. “Would you prefer us to be totally honest with one another?” 

Dean blinks; his brain is slow without the aid of caffeine in the mornings, and his focus is distracted by his familiar’s casually flicking tail. “Yeah,” he finally manages to get out. “I want us to be a team.” 

“Then you should know,” Castiel’s whiskers twitch. “I find you very…distracting.” He ducks his head for a moment and rubs his cheek against the pillow. “It’s disconcerting for me. You smell…very, very good.”

Dean feels some of the anxiety that’s been building in his chest for the last twenty-four hours ease away. “I don’t know what we’re supposed to be doing,” he admits as he flops onto his back on the bed, sheet riding low at his hips but at least offering him some coverage. 

“We’re supposed to spend the next several days bonding,” Castiel answers. His tail slips down to wrap around Dean’s calf under the thin sheet. Something about his simple touch is easing Dean’s nerves, making him feel comforted. 

“Yeah,” Dean nods. “I got that part, but what I’m missing is the section of the text book they gave me explaining how I would want to…you know…with you…all of a sudden.”

Castiel’s body shakes, his head tips to the side and Dean’s eyes widen as he realizes his familiar is _laughing_. 

His kitty face contorted into what is totally a smile. 

“Shut up,” Dean snorts before he also starts to chuckle. This whole situation is a hot mess. 

“At least you got a book,” Castiel giggles. “I was at the ceremony to protest the need for bonding, then _WHAM!_ I’m going home with you!” 

The words sober Dean immediately. “Did they force this on you? I wouldn’t want that. I’ll let you go home. You don’t have to stay with me.”

Castiel’s hand gently cupping the side of his face stops the flow of words. “I came with you of my own will, Dean. I want to be with you.” 

“Oh,” Dean whispers. “Good to know.” 

He’s distracted again by the feel of Castiel’s tail moving up his leg until the tip is flirting with brushing against his balls. He blushes again but decides it’s better just to hit this head on, since the familiar has made it clear he’s staying. “I didn’t know this bond was sexual.”

Once he spits it out he wants to choke it right back in. 

Castiel’s eyes swirl with confusion and something else Dean can’t identify until his partner is smiling again. Humor. That’s what Castiel looks like when he's amused. 

“It’s not,” he finally answers as he scoots closer. “The bonding process is different for each pair. It’s meant to fulfill us both spiritually and emotionally. It’s why scryers and familiars once bonded do not begin other relationships. They have no need.”

“So our bond is based in wanting sex?” Dean questions even though it makes him squirm because, damn, he’s been hard for what feels like forever and it’s not going away. 

“No,” Castiel huffs before nipping at Dean’s shoulder. “However, it’s based on what makes us feel complete. I enjoy being touched, though I allow it rarely. It’s something that makes me feel whole, content. I don’t think I could live my life without it. And you…seek intimacy through the physical act of sex…touching. So our bond encourages us to seek it from each other.”

“But you don’t mind?” Dean asks as he rolls over. “It’s not just the bond for you?” 

“You…are mine,” Castiel growls, his tail curling around Dean’s hard on and rubbing just right with that silky smooth fur. “I’m yours.” 

“Yeah,” Dean agrees as he tugs Castiel closer by his pointy ears. “I get it. I feel the same way. Enough with the talking thing, I’m not really good at it. Come here and let me figure out how to kiss you.”

It takes a couple of tries, a lot of laughter, but they finally get it right. 

****

_There’s a little boy sitting in the middle of a field. It looks vaguely familiar, but Dean can’t place from where. The sky is the wrong color, sort of hazy purple with fast moving clouds._

_Sometimes the visions are like that._

_There’s an imp next to the boy, wings and tail curled protectively around the smaller frame of the child. They’re whispering to each other. The child’s eyes widen as the imp cocks his head and snaps his fingers. There’s a flash of light and the child exclaims, “GABRIEL!”_

_Then they both fall over laughing in the grass._

_Dean walks closer, knowing that they won’t react to his presence. He’s had this dream before. It’s the sixth time and every time he dreams it Dean gets a little farther in to the future._

_“They chase me,” the little boy whispers as he cuddles next to the imp’s side._

_“They can’t hurt you,” the imp called Gabriel answers as he ruffles the little boy’s brown hair. “They need your help.”_

_“I can’t do it on my own,” the little boy responds._

_“You don’t have to be alone,” Gabriel comments as he presses a kiss to the child’s hair. “I’ll be with you.”_

_“Promise?” The little boy asks, wide eyes pleading._

_“Always, kiddo,” Gabriel smiles. “We belong to each other. I’ll never leave you.”_

_Dean’s never understood why he has this particular vision. Nothing happens in it that gives away any hint of trouble._

_Until tonight._

_The world melts around him, and Gabriel’s face goes from the peaceful bliss of a familiar with its chosen partner to agony as the scene shifts into a cell, in some kind of basement. The imp is chained in the corner. He’s doubled over, his face pressed to the floor, and he's screaming._

_“You will do this,” a voice hisses from the darkness._

_“No!” Gabriel cries out before his body convulses and he screams again._

_Dean rushes forward even though he knows he can’t help. He can’t change anything in these dreams. But as he reaches the imp's side Gabriel turns to look at him fully, eyes welling with unshed tears._

_“Protect him, Dean,” the imp orders. He sounds desperate, afraid. “Kill me if you have to, but keep him safe, please!”_

Dean flails upright in the bed, Castiel rushing into the bedroom with a growl. 

“I’m sorry,” Castiel says gruffly as he tugs Dean’s shaking form into his arms. “I was making us food. I was distracted by the oddness of your kitchen. I thought the bad feelings were mine.”

Dean gasps as he clings to his familiar’s warmer-than-human body. He rubs his face in the soft fur of Castiel’s neck and takes deep breaths. It’s a little disturbing how comforting he finds this. He barely knows his familiar, but even with their limited time together, every instinct Dean has points to Castiel as a trusted friend, a protector. 

It just feels so damned good to not be alone. 

“Are they always so powerful?” Castiel asks as he scratches his claws down Dean’s spine lightly, a grounding touch. His tail wraps around Dean’s leg, curling softly around his calf, and a rumbling purr starts in the familiar’s chest. 

Dean turns into the touches until it’s less of a hold and more of a snuggle. “No,” he sighs. “Sometimes it’s just like a dream. Sometimes they’re nice…peaceful. This one has been until tonight. It’s just a little boy and an imp in a field, talking. It’s weird though, I swear I know that kid. But how can I recognize someone who might not even be born yet?”

“Did the familiar have a name?” Castiel questions. 

“Gabriel,” Dean answers. “Things changed; someone was hurting him, Castiel. He was in agony. But it’s like he saw me, he talked to me. Told me I had to protect someone for him, or from him…I’m not sure. But he didn’t say who.”

“You’ve never seen this part of the vision before?” Castiel’s nuzzling the side of his face, rough tongue slipping out to bath Dean’s ear. 

“Not until tonight,” Dean leans against Castiel more heavily, petting his furred head and finally relaxing fully into his familiar’s embrace. “They said with you my gifts would be enhanced. Do you think him talking to me is part of that?”

Castiel looks like he’s deep in thought for a minute, then his eyes flick over to Dean’s face. “It’s possible. It’s also possible this familiar is so desperate he’s reaching back to you for help. If he’s seeking to protect his chosen there’s nothing he wouldn’t do.” 

“I didn’t know the bonds went so deep.” 

Dean groans when he hears the movement of his front door opening. Only one other person has a key and knows how to get past the wards. 

Sam’s here. It’s time to go to work. 

“Do you not feel it?” Castiel whispers as he presses his palm into the center of Dean’s chest. He eyes look worried. 

“I feel it,” Dean assures his, covering Castiel’s hand with his own and squeezing. “I just kind of thought we were doing it wrong.” 

Castiel snorts, and Dean takes the unguarded moment before what is bound to be a rocky start with Sam, to kiss his familiar’s smile curved mouth. 

Then it’s time to face the music. 

*****

“It’s been three days,” Sam snaps as soon as Dean enters the living room with Castiel trailing slightly behind him. “Did you even leave the bedroom?”

“I was unaware leaving the bedroom was a requirement,” Castiel answers as he brushes past the taller Winchester to enter the kitchen and finish preparing his meal. “Though the couch was entertaining.”

Sam narrows his eyes for a moment before turning from Castiel to Dean and announcing, “Oh good, it talks now.” 

Castiel’s answering snarl makes the dishes on the counter rattle and move. Sam has the decency to look frightened, even though Castiel can scent he’s more angry than afraid. 

It seems Sam is a bit territorial, and Castiel has come in and claimed what’s his. 

“Sam!” Dean snaps. “Not cool.” 

Castiel feels his fur settle down at Dean’s defense of him. He’s much more secure in their link after three days of constant contact. 

“I have no intention of taking your brother from you,” Castiel addresses Sam with a formal nod of respect. “As Dean’s familiar, what is important to him is important to me. You are irreplaceable, Sam. I only ask you allow me to join your circle, not destroy it.”

“I don’t like familiars,” Sam blurts, then blinks as though the thought escaped without his consent. Just to his left Castiel can see Dean swipe a hand over his face and feels something akin to horror glide over their link. 

He smiles, purposefully showing his fangs. “That’s acceptable. I don’t like humans either.” 

Sam’s eyes widen comically, and Dean groans. 

“But I do like Dean,” Castiel adds with a swish of his tail. 

“I like him, too,” Sam nods slowly. “Some of the time.”

Dean glares at the back of Sam’s head, but Castiel feels the link between them swell with relief. 

“Do you like cheese in your eggs?” Castiel asks as he turns back to the stove. “I am admittedly a poor chef, but I believe I can manage breakfast for the three of us.” 

“Sure,” Sam says as he slides over to lift himself up and sit on the counter. “Thanks.”

Castiel nods. It’s a small thing, but it’s a start. 

They prepare to leave the apartment to head across town. They're going to follow up on a lead Sam had discovered during Dean and Castiel's bonding time. Something related to a vision Dean had prior to Castiel coming home with him. 

He’s shocked to discover that this is their job. “You use Dean’s abilities to stop his negative visions from occurring?”

Sam shrugs, swallowing the last of his coffee before answering. “If we can. Sometimes Dean dreams the same thing over and over. Our dad taught him how to look for details, times, dates, important items that might be related to the vision. Then he sketches them for me, or describes them to me, and I go and track them down. Once that part's done we backtrack from the vision to now and see if we can head it off at the pass.”

“So you hunt people for things they may not yet have done?” Something about the idea of it makes Castiel’s fur feel like it’s been rubbed the wrong way.

“No,” Sam argues with a shake of his head. “We don’t attack innocent people. Sometimes all it takes is a disruption to their routine. If we know person A is going to get mugged on a particular street at noon tomorrow, and that they will shoot person B, the mugger, and kill them accidentally while trying to protect themselves, we try to stop it. We’re not saying Person A needs to go to jail for something they may or may not do. And we’re not saying Person B is a bad person for potentially mugging them. What we try to do is get Person A to ride home with us, or get Person B some help somewhere else so the whole event never happens in the first place.”

“It sounds complicated,” Castiel comments, though he’s proud of their efforts. Dean has turned his rare talent into something good and helpful where many others would have just felt burdened by such a thing, or would have only tried to help those who were considered important enough to spend time on. 

The Winchesters help every man. The more he learns about his scryer, the more proud Castiel is of him. The more grateful he is to be his bonded. The more honest he is with himself about the glowing layer of sweet and golden affection underlying their link being a personal one, ever growing and strengthening, rather than one created by the bonding process. 

He’s so lost in his thoughts that when Dean steps close to his side Castiel turns with a loud, pleased purr and nuzzles against his ear without thinking of their audience. 

Sam makes a noise sounding like a small animal being squeezed too hard, and Dean flushes a lovely shade of pink all over. His scent even changes, and it’s so hard for Castiel to reign in his instinctual urge to press his nose against his bonded and inhale deeply. 

“Uhh,” Sam comments as he turns his back. “We need to get going, Dean.”

“Agreed,” Castiel slides back and heads toward the door. “I suppose this means another ride in that contraption. I know you love her, but she was not made with for those of us who have a tail in mind.”

When he gets to the door he notices Dean is not following him. 

“What?”

“You can’t go,” Dean answers. His voice is steady, cool even, but the link between them drips with grief and concern. “We do most of our work under cover, Castiel. A giant walking kitty cat is going to kind of give us away.” 

Sam snorts. Castiel’s tail thrashes, but his human has a point. 

“Give me just a moment,” he requests before ducking down the hallway into the bedroom. Castiel has changed, shifted, before. It’s a skill all familiars have in order to make their passing in the human world easier. He doesn’t like it, but he likes the idea of Dean going out without him even less. 

It’s a few moments of concentration and a bit of discomfort, and when he looks at himself in the mirror he sees a pale, average size man with brown hair and blue eyes looking back at him. Castiel is a bit off balance due to his lack of tail when he walks closer to the mirror and smiles at himself. His sharp teeth glint back at him. 

He’ll have to work on refining this form, but it will get him through the day. 

He drags on a pair of Dean’s jeans and a t-shirt. They’re large on him but not horribly so. The shoes are odd, he never wears them as a cat, but he makes due. Should this become a regular thing he will need his own clothing. 

Castiel takes a deep breath and turns toward the living room area. 

This should be interesting. 

*****

Sam draws his gun as soon as the man strolls out of Dean’s room wearing Dean’s favorite t-shirt. 

He didn’t think anyone else was in the house. 

“Put your hands up!” he orders. 

The man just turns and smiles at him. It’s not very comforting with him sporting a bunch of sharp looking teeth. Sam’s finger tightens around the trigger. No way in Hell is he getting eaten in Dean’s living room. 

“Cas?” Dean asks from off to his left, and the strange man chuckles. Sam groans, puts the gun away and wishes like Hell his brother had never been given a familiar. 

Life was so much easier when it was just the two of them. 

“Jesus,” he mutters as Dean walks over to brush careful fingers over Castiel’s human face. He then dips in to kiss him, easy and gentle, like Sam’s not standing right there watching them be all gross and connected. 

It’s not that Sam’s never thought he was in love before, not that he’s never had a relationship where he cared about the other person. 

It’s just weird to see _Dean_ like that. 

It’s Dean, for fucks sake!

“I’m ready now,” Castiel rumbles in a voice that totally does _not_ match his body. Sam follows them to the car with a sigh. 

He’s not surprised when Dean tosses him the keys. His brother is carrying his sketch pad, and that means Dean’s got something to draw. 

Having the trip go down with nothing but the sound of Zeppelin playing on the radio, and Dean’s humming off and on while he draws, gives Sam a sense of normalcy even with Castiel sitting in the back seat. 

“What are you drawing?” Sam asks as he parks the Impala and shuts her off. Dean’s barely looked up the whole time they’ve been traveling. “Something about this case?”

“No,” Dean sighs as he rubs his eyes like he’s coming out of a trance. It’s like that for him sometimes. He gets so focused on the paper Sam sometimes wonders if it’s another part of his brother’s talent no one has picked up on yet. 

Without the aid of a vision Dean can’t draw anything but stick figures. Give him something from his dreams to draw and it’s like a still life. 

“It’s this thing I keep dreaming about a little boy and an imp.” Dean grumbles. He sounds frustrated. 

“Is he hurting the kid?” Sam questions immediately. He hears Castiel huff in the backseat. 

“No, Sam!” Dean groans. “They’re bonded or something. It’s really kinda…sweet, I guess.” 

“So why are you drawing it?” Sam asks. They don’t waste their time trying to draw Dean’s good visions. It’s probably best to stay as far away from those as possible in case they mess something up. 

“Because this time at the end someone was torturing the imp,” Dean answers. “He talked to me, Sam. Asked me to protect someone, but he didn’t say who. It seemed really important.”

“He talked to you?” Sam’s fascinated. “You said they never do that.”

“They haven’t, until now. Maybe the rules are changing with Cas here.”

“Rules?” Castiel questions as he leans forward from the back seat. 

Sam nods. “Dean’s visions follow a pattern. Rule one – they never notice Dean’s there. He can’t interfere with the vision. Rule two – he never dreams about his own future, or mine for some reason. Rule three – every time he uncovers something in the present about the case, the dreams change to give us more information. We knew things were going to change with you here. We just have no idea how.”

“Fascinating,” Castiel whispers. Something in the way he says it makes Sam wonder if Castiel is as lost in this process as they are. 

It makes Sam feel better about the whole thing. 

“Anyway,” Dean huffs as he slides the sketch pad towards Sam. “Here’s what I’ve got so far. Just his face and body really. Maybe I’ll dream it again.”

Sam holds the pad up and gives it a once over. Something makes his chest pound and his head ache as he takes in the figure hunched over in a clearly self protecting pose. The imp has wings, a thin tail with a point on the end of it, small horns protruding from his forehead. But his eyes. Even in Dean’s rough sketch they look pleading and filled with pain. 

Something sharp and painful snaps in Sam’s head and he gasps, dropping the pad and covering his face with both hands. 

“What’s wrong?!” Dean’s voice has that mother hen tone it gets when he thinks Sam is in trouble. 

“Nothing,” Sam whispers as he elbows his brother back to get more room. “I have a headache all of a sudden.” 

“Just like that?” Dean asks. It sounds like he doesn’t believe Sam. 

Sam doesn’t believe it either, honestly. 

Then too warm fingers are brushing over the back of his head and the pain eases away. 

“It’s magic,” Castiel comments from where he’s now sitting much closer to Sam. “I’ve done my best to numb it, Sam.”

“Magic from where?” Dean demands. 

“I don’t know,” Castiel sounds interested more than concerned. “It’s very old. But from what’s left of the signature, I can tell it’s powerful, made to protect, not harm.”

“Not a good enough answer, Cas.” Dean’s scowling as Sam lowers his hands. 

“I’m aware,” Castiel agrees. “But there is nothing to be done about it now. Perhaps we should continue with our plans for the day. I will look into, Dean. You have my word.”

Dean’s not happy, that much is clear from the look on his face. Sam’s not either as he goes to get out of the car. Magic is a tricky thing, hurtful or helpful; he would prefer it didn’t happen to him. 

Castiel watches him for the rest of the day like Sam is a puzzle he’s trying to figure out. 

That doesn’t make him feel any better either.

*****

_It’s dark in the bedroom when Dean opens his eyes. Scattered toys cover the floor and the bed is made with Star Wars bed sheets. The little boy from the field is held protectively in the wings and arms of the imp._

_“She scares me,” the little boy whispers._

_“Why?” Gabriel asks._

_“She’s ugly,” the little boy answers as he peers over Gabriel’s wing at something in the corner._

_Dean follows his gaze and catches the faint visage of a horribly mutilated woman. The boy can speak to the dead. That explains why he has a familiar. Still, he’s so young. Most people don’t come into their powers until closer to their teens. Dean’s had his since he was born, though, so it’s not unheard of for it to happen young._

_“She’s not ugly,” Gabriel says with a smile. There's so much vulnerability in his face when he looks at his charge. He’s so open, like the kid means everything to him. “Let me show you.”_

_Gabriel turns toward the ghost, his eyes developing a soft pinkish glow that makes Dean chuckle._

_Sam hates the color pink. Dean used to chase him with one of their grandmother’s sweaters when they were teenagers just because the color pissed Sam off._

_The ghost shifts, wounds healing, face softening into a smile. She’s actually attractive, or she was when she was alive._

_“That better?” Gabriel asks and the little boy nods slowly, sitting up and leaning forward to get a better look._

_“I don’t know what to do,” he says, sounding so small._

_“Talk to her,” Gabriel encourages. “Let her tell you whatever she needs to say and then she’ll go and we can sleep.”_

_“You don’t sleep,” the little boy says accusingly._

_“Maybe not,” Gabriel laughs, “but you need to or you’ll be grumpy and your brother won’t take you to the fair.”_

_“You leave Dean out of this,” the little boy says with a shove._

_Dean freezes._

_Sammy?_

_Oh God, it’s Sam._

_This isn’t the future._

_“Dean…” Gabriel says softly. He climbs off the bed and comes toward Dean slowly as the room fades to black._

_“Dean.” Gabriel says more firmly as he gets closer, wings expanding to fill the space with his webbing. No feathers, more like bats wings._

_“DEAN!” Gabriel shouts in his face and Dean snaps back into himself at the desperate tone of the imp’s voice._

_He looks at Gabriel, really looks at him for the first time. His hands are covered with blood, so is the front of his chest. There’s branding on his wings and his horns. He’s too thin, shaking, bending down to crouch over a still form on the ground._

_It’s Sam…grown up, like he is now, but bloody, body torn open in horrible gashes. Dean watches in horror as Gabriel slides his hand into his little brother’s open chest._

_“Stop me, Dean,” Gabriel pleads even as he rips out a rib. “Kill me, please. Don’t let me do this. Don’t let him make me do this.”_

Dean wakes up screaming, clawing at the sheets. He surges up and runs out into the living room, slamming into Castiel and sobbing as he collapses into a heap onto the ground. 

“Sam!” Dean sobs as Castiel holds him. 

“I know,” Castiel says. “I knew in the car today. Gabriel has marked him.” 

Dean’s head is pounding. He lets Castiel guide him to the couch, bring him a glass of cool water, and leans against him as his familiar explains. 

“We have a mark that comes with being bonded. Each familiar's mark is different. It exists for a number of reasons but the most important is that once the link is formed it can never be fully broken. As long as a scryer and their familiar lives, even if they are separated, the mark stays stamped on their very being. A way to identify each other or for others to not try and engage one already claimed.”

“So Gabriel is Sam’s familiar?” Dean sits up and rubs his tear stained face. “But there was no ceremony. Sam’s got no powers.” 

“There are several of us that go out into the human world exploring, to learn,” Castiel cocks his head and looks off as though he’s thinking while his tail rubs up and down Dean’s back. “I suspect Gabriel was one of these. If he felt the draw of the bond as I did to you then he would have followed it to Sam’s side when his powers manifested. He may have been with Sam since he was born, Dean.”

“But why didn’t we know about it?” Dean asks. “Why not just introduce himself?”

“I don’t know,” Castiel answers. “It may be because you’re not of a known bloodline. Perhaps Gabriel had his own reasons. I can’t speak to that, but what I can tell you is that for a familiar to do what Gabriel did to Sam and then leave him…Gabriel must have been trying very hard to protect your brother.”

“What exactly did he do to Sam?” Dean questions as he turns to look at Castiel. 

“He built a wall around Sam’s abilities,” Castiel’s ears flick. “He made it as though your brother had no gifts, so Sam couldn’t access them, and then he cloaked the memories of their time together. It’s not something I could do with you. As an adult your brain functions differently than a child’s mind. Gabriel may only seem like a dream to Sam now, as though he never really existed.”

“Until I showed Sam the sketch,” Dean sighs as he wipes at his face. 

“Yes,” Castiel nods. “Something fractured in the magic surrounding Sam then. He’s going to start to remember now. The magic is falling away. Now that Sam’s seen Gabriel…nothing will stop that.” 

“He looked horrified,” Dean mutters into Castiel’s fur as he curls back close to his familiar’s warmth. “He told me to stop him before someone made him hurt Sam. How can someone make him do that?”

Castiel sighs, squeezing Dean close for a moment before sliding away and stepping into the center of the living room, where the rug has been moved and there are unfamiliar runes drawn onto the floor. “The answer to that is why I’ve been up all night. It’s the same reason I never wanted to bond with anyone before you, why I was protesting the day you came into my life. The link isn’t entirely fair, Dean.” 

“I don’t get it,” Dean comments as he steps closer to look at the symbols. “These are like what I saw on Gabriel’s body.”

“If that’s true,” Castiel murmurs as he curls his arms and his tail around himself, “then Gabriel has suffered much these past years.” 

“You’ve lost me,” Dean admits as he stops to pick up a knife placed on the outside of the circle. 

“I’ll show you,” Castiel whispers. “It will mean more that way. Take the knife, cut your palm and place your bleeding hand to the line of the circle. While you hold it there pick up the paper beside you, unfold it and read the word I’ve written on it. When you’ve seen enough drag your hand through the line of circle. It will break the spell.” 

“What am I about to do to you, Cas?” Dean asks with a sense of foreboding so strong he’s sick with it.

“You’re about to exercise the full force of your will,” Castiel whispers as he sinks to his knees. “Begin, please. I would prefer to end this as soon as possible.” 

Dean hisses as the knife blade slices into his hand. He places his palm on the chalk line as he was told and spares a glance at Castiel’s frozen features before he unfolds the paper to his left and reads the single word written upon it. 

“Pain.” 

Castiel’s body arches, his hands fall open and his head tips back with the force of his screams. 

*****

Castiel wakes in their bedroom. Dean is sitting in a chair beside the bed when he turns toward his human with a groan. His face looks angry, but the smell of fear is strong in the air, and across their link Castiel senses his worry. 

“I’m well, Dean,” Castiel whispers then whimpers with gratitude when Dean hands him a glass of water to sooth his throat. 

“What did I do to you?” Dean asks as his hand slips back down to tangle with Castiel’s tail. 

“It’s a spell,” Castiel sighs as he flexes tired muscles. “It uses the link to bend the familiar to the scryer’s will. Once in place, whatever you want me to feel, I will.”

“So if I say pleasure…” Dean sighs, rubbing his hand over his face. “What? You orgasm on the spot?”

Castiel chuckles, “I should have thought of that. It would have been much more fun.” 

“Not funny, Cas,” Dean warns. He gets up to slide into the bed himself and gathers Castiel against his chest. “I hurt you today. I never want to do that again.”

“Neither do I,” Castiel agrees as he closes his eyes and begins a weak purr. Just being near Dean brings him so much comfort. “I do not know how Gabriel has withstood it for so long.”

“So you’re saying whoever has him has been torturing him for years?” Dean questions. Castiel feels the disgust from him along their bond. 

“He clearly wants something,” Castiel murmurs. “Gabriel must be unable to hold him off any more. We need to figure out what it is.”

“How could someone use the spell to hurt Gabriel when Gabriel’s already linked to my brother?” Dean questions. 

“Gabriel did everything he could to terminate the link to Sam,” Castiel answers. He ruffles a hand through Dean’s hair when his human jerks in his arms. “The wall in Sam’s mind was placed there specifically to make him unable to use his powers or access memories related to Gabriel or their time together. I’m not sure why he did it, but Gabriel must have been trying to protect your brother. If the link was damaged in such a way then Gabriel would be vulnerable. It would have cost him much of his magic to make the wall. In such a state a scryer powerful enough could force a false bond.”

“To do what?” Dean snaps. “What would be the point of forcing someone who doesn’t want you to stay?”

“Many people take pleasure in power, Dean,” Castiel explains. “To some of your people my kind are nothing more than tools to be used and discarded. Gabriel is not this man’s familiar…he’s his slave.”

Dean sighs, “I should tell Sam.”

“Yes,” Castiel agrees, as much as he hates it. “This is going to be very unpleasant.” 

That turns out to be the understatement of the century. 

Sam is furious. He paces, shouts, throws denials at every turn, and even brings Dean’s abilities into question. Castiel is furious, but Dean is quick to come to his brother's defence. 

“Think about it, Cas.” Dean whispers as he grabs Castiel’s hand. “Imagine being told everything in your life was a lie. Think about how you would feel if you suddenly found out everything you thought you knew about the world, about yourself, was wrong, and the only person who could explain to you why this happened is going to try to kill you even though they don’t want to.” 

When it’s put like that… Castiel has no trouble understanding Sam’s fury. 

“Where is he?” Sam snaps as he slams the sketch pad of Gabriel picture down on the table for what must be the third time. It’s as though he doesn’t want to hold it but is unable to look away. 

“We don’t know yet,” Dean answers before shifting on the couch. “But whatever is about to happen it’s going to be soon.”

“How do you know that?” Castiel asks.

Dean’s answer makes all the hair on his body stand up. “Sam’s wearing the same clothes he’s wearing right now in the dream. Sometimes I don’t get much warning. Gabriel’s coming for him tonight.” 

Silence settles around them like a blanket. 

*****

He creeps down the hallway in the darkness. It has never troubled him; his vision is much better than a human’s, anyway. His wings are curved in tightly against his back to avoid any collisions that might give away his position. 

Inside his own head Gabriel is screaming. He does not want to be here, does not want to do this. Just the idea of seeing his dear, sweet human again is so painful. He can’t imagine it. But to have to hurt him, kill him, for this man who now pulls the magical strings controlling his body... it's too much. 

Gabriel prays for death every chance he gets. He doesn’t get many chances. 

He rounds the corner into the living room of Sam Winchester’s apartment, stepping into the moonlit center of the room as he crosses toward the bedroom on the far side. Then a light clicks on in the kitchen. 

Dean Winchester is standing there, next to his new familiar. Gabriel turns with a hiss. Now they’re going to have to die too. 

“Hello, Gabriel,” Sam comments from his other side. The imp turns just fast enough to see Sam’s bloodied hand land on the chalk lines covering the floor. Then it’s like all of his strings are cut, and for the first time in twenty years he’s free of the oppressive influence of the _other_. 

“Sam?” he questions weakly as he pulls himself up from the ground he’s fallen to. 

“Do we have him?” Dean asks from the kitchen. 

“Only one way to know for sure,” Sam answers, turning his attention back to Gabriel and saying, “Pain.”

Gabriel’s body contorts as he screams. 

It’s daylight when he wakes up, head clear and body aching. He’s still on the floor inside the circle. 

“Hello?” he croaks when he doesn’t see anyone. 

“Gabriel,” the familiar says calmly as he walks in from the kitchen. “Are you with us?”

“Yes,” Gabriel nods as he flexes his wings. “You guys got my messages, huh?” 

“Indeed,” the cat nods. “My name is Castiel.”

“Where’s Sam?” Gabriel blurts, then winces at how much the question is giving away. It’s been so many years; he just wants to see his human once before they end him. 

“You can’t see him yet,” Castiel answers. “I need you to do something first.”

“So I’ve traded one form of slavery for another?” Gabriel spits. “Just kill me.”

“We’re not going to kill you, Gabriel,” Castiel's kitty face looks offended. “But those markings on you must be destroyed before it’s safe for you to see Sam.”

Gabriel touches the carvings on his horns, and his wings spread unconsciously. “How?”

“No one can enter the circle,” Castiel answers with a flick of his ears. “You’re going to have to remove them yourself.” 

He points one clawed hand and Gabriel follows his gaze to where an electric sander is sitting just inside the circle, next to an iron and a blow torch. “You want me to sand my horns?”

“I want you to rid yourself of the taint so we can help you,” Castiel answers. 

When it’s put that way it’s a little hard to argue with it. 

Gabriel works on his horns first; it’s painless but tedious work. They’re bone; he has no feeling in them, but his wings are a whole different animal. 

“How hot does it have to be?” Gabriel asks as he turns on the blow torch and holds the iron into the flame.

“Glowing,” Castiel growls. “I do not imagine you wish to have to repeat this process.”

“Yeah,” Gabriel snorts as he leans back and opens his wing along the ground. “Twice is enough. Now tell me when it’s in the right position.”

There’s a pause as Gabriel settles and Castiel watches. “Now,” the feline familiar says. Gabriel closes his eyes and slams the burning metal disk down on top of the sigil forced into his flesh so many years ago. 

It’s unbelievably painful, but Gabriel has almost forgotten how to feel anything but pain. 

When the haze of agony fades Castiel is still crouching at the edge of the circle. 

“Gabriel?” he asks. His tail curls and uncurls behind his back 

“I’m here,” Gabriel murmurs. “One down, one to go, right?” 

Castiel’s ear twitches and Gabriel knows his bravado is coming off false. 

He re-lights the blow torch and begins the process again. His wing is throbbing dully, but his life has been nothing but agony for so long he hardly notices the difference. 

As he watches the metal heat he asks, “Sam doesn’t want to see me, does he?”

Castiel sighs. “He is very upset with you right now.” 

“He has every right to be,” Gabriel nods while he waits. “I did everything I could to protect him, Castiel. I wanted him to live, not be some bastard’s prized possession. He stalked us, stalked Sam. I wasn’t strong enough to protect Sam. So I hid him.”

“I’m not the one you need to tell, Gabriel,” Castiel comments. 

“I know,” Gabriel whispers as he prepares to take the final step to free himself. Just thinking on his own is frightening; the idea of being able to decide what to eat tonight is so foreign he can’t wrap his mind around it. “Did he have a good life, Castiel?”

“You can ask him yourself in few minutes,” Castiel counters. 

Gabriel holds onto that single thought as he slams the branding iron onto his other wing. He feels something horrible and painful fracture inside him. The backlash of being finally free of that monster sends him into unconsciousness. 

****

“He’s not going to hurt Sam, is he?” Dean asks as he watches his little brother smoothing a wash cloth over his long lost familiar’s face. 

“His love for your brother is boundless,” Castiel assures him. “Gabriel has suffered a lifetime to protect Sam.”

“I know,” Dean whispers. Sam is spreading Gabriel's wings open and checking the places he burned. Just the idea that this being would injure himself so badly just to be given a chance to see Sam one more time…Dean thinks maybe he underestimated the strength of these bonds. “Don’t ever leave me, Cas.”

The words are out of his mouth before he can stop them. It’s embarrassing how much better it makes him feel to have Castiel hum slightly, lean against him, and wrap his tail around Dean’s leg. 

“Leaving you would never be my first choice,” Castiel comments. “Though if it would save your life I have to admit I would be tempted.” 

Dean doesn’t know what to say that, choosing instead to wrap an arm around Castiel’s shoulders and tug him into a quick embrace. His familiar leans against him with a purr, and Dean rubs his face happily against Castiel’s whiskers. 

“Do you wish I looked more human?” Castiel whispers into his ear. 

“No,” Dean chuckles. They fit together so easily he sometimes forgets they’ve had such a small amount of time to get to know each other. “Kissing you with your human face just feels sort of weird. I like your fur too much to get rid of it. You’re perfect, Cas. You’re what you’re meant to be.”

“As are you.” Castiel growls his answer before leaning over to snuffle affectionately at Dean’s hair. “As much as I enjoy this, we need to talk privately, Dean.”

Dean nods. He hesitates to follow though, turning back one more time to watch Sam slide into a chair pulled close to the bed and reach out to pat awkwardly at the familiar’s hand. It’s a little bit like Sam can’t stop touching Gabriel. It makes Dean wonder if some of the turmoil that’s always swirled around inside his little brother might settle down now. Maybe Sam can find some peace. 

“This isn’t over,” Castiel comments when Dean joins him in the living room, looking down at the mess they’ve made of Sam’s floor. 

“I know,” Dean sighs. “Whoever had Gabriel and sent him after Sam has to know the connection between them is broken now. They’ll know Gabriel died or escaped. It doesn’t mean Sam’s safe.”

“I actually think it means he’s in even more danger than he already was,” Castiel nods. He motions for Dean to take a seat on Sam’s couch. “We need more information, Dean.”

“I know,” Dean huffs, frustrated by the whole situation. “What do you want me to do about it?”

“Go to sleep,” Castiel answers with a flick of his tail. “Your dreams are our best bet to finding out what might be happening next. We need you to see the future.”

“It doesn’t work like that,” Dean grunts, but he lets Castiel push him gently back until he’s sprawled across Sam’s couch. “I can’t just call up a vision. I might dream nothing, or I could dream a future for the old lady down the hall.”

“You couldn’t do it on your own,” Castiel agrees as he settles against Dean’s side. “But we can do it together.”

He sounds so sure of it, Dean can’t even argue. “Who’s going to protect Sam while we sleep?”

“Who do you think?” Castiel huffs out a kitty chuckle. “As if Gabriel would go through so much just to lose him now.” 

“Gabriel’s unconscious,” Dean points out as he goes to sit back up. This isn’t going to work. 

“No he’s not,” Castiel argues. He pushes Dean back down and settles his body slightly on top of Dean’s to hold him there. “But you’re about to be.” 

Dean turns to glare at him, but Castiel eyes are glowing unnaturally bright in the light coming from the windows. Dean’s suddenly really tired. His last thought before sleep claims him is Castiel’s been holding out on him. They’re going to have to talk about this. 

Just as soon as Dean wakes up.

*****

“I can tell you’re faking,” a voice reaches Gabriel where he’s been curled with his eyes shut since consciousness came back to him. Even though he’s never heard his human speak as an adult, Gabriel knows it has to be Sam’s voice. 

The spark in his soul, all that’s left of their link, tells him exactly where Sam is now that they’re so close. 

“It just feels good,” Gabriel answers, even though using his raw throat is painful. “I wasn’t ready to face reality.”

“Being in a bed?” Sam questions. 

“Being free,” Gabriel sighs. “Being here, with you.”

He opens his eyes then, gaze falling on his human. Sam was a small child the last time Gabriel saw him. This man sitting next to his bedside is _huge_.

“When did you get so big?” Gabriel gasps. 

Sam’s jaw tightens, his hands clench, “You left me,” he says accusingly. “You promised me we would always be together, and you lied.”

Everything inside Gabriel feels like it’s getting up and trying to roll over. 

“I’m so angry with you,” Sam hisses and Gabriel watches a single tear make its way free from Sam’s eyes. 

“No you’re not,” Gabriel whispers with a shake of his head. “You’re hurt. I can feel it. I hurt you and I lied to you. I’m so sorry, Sam.”

He pushes himself up as a tremor runs through his human’s body. Sam makes a noise like a whimper and Gabriel reaches out with shaking hands to touch, to sooth. 

Sam jerks backward and everything crumbles apart. “I’m not a little boy anymore, Gabriel. I don’t need you to hold me.” 

Oh that’s so painful to hear. 

“Okay,” Gabriel mumbles, licking his lips as he looks away and curls up into himself. “I understand.”

The silence stretches for miles and miles between them. 

“Could you hold me instead?” Gabriel blurts out in desperation. He can’t lose this, not now. “I know I don’t deserve it, I know I’m a disappointment. But I’m scared, Sam. And I hurt, and I need you.”

He feels it the second Sam reaches out along their link. Worry at first, and such unbearable hurting flowing through their bond. Gabriel eats it up gratefully; almost two decades has passed since he’s felt the brush of Sam’s soul against his own. Whatever his bonded is willing to give him now, Gabriel will take it, cherish it. It’s better than the hole slowly devouring his soul. The feelings deepen, widen, and develop texture and layers that Sam lacked when last they touched like this. It rocks Gabriel; this change adulthood has brought to the one he’s most connected to in the world. 

He reaches back, brushing his gratitude along the lines between them and something deep and hard inside him snaps, fractures, and falls away. Sam gasps, leaning forward and reaching for him with arms so long they shouldn’t be human. He’s gathered against a chest and cradled in an embrace he never thought he'd experience. Gabriel grabs fistfuls of Sam’s shirt along his shoulders, and his wings fling out to curve around them both. 

“I can barely get my wings around you now,” he gasps in wonder, and Sam’s chest reverberates under his ear as he laughs. It’s bliss to be like this, to be so close. 

It heals wounds Gabriel didn’t even know he had. 

They’re both crying, giggling like school children as Gabriel smoothes Sam’s hair away from his face and catalogs the changes to his charges body. Sam’s eyes track over his face as well and Gabriel tries not to wince under the attention. 

Sam’s not the only one who has changed. Gabriel might not age like a human, but he can be injured and his body, face and all, is a roadmap of scars. 

“I’m a little worse for wear,” Gabriel offers as Sam trails careful fingertips along his marks. 

“You suffered through all of this for me,” Sam whispers. His eyes look so sad. 

“It was worth it,” Gabriel assures him, and he means it. He forces his certainty along their bond and hopes Sam picks up on it. 

“Gabriel,” Sam chokes out as he holds his tighter. “How can you say that? What happened to you…”

“Every single time he hurt me...” Gabriel swallows before cupping Sam’s cheek and leaning up to rest their foreheads together. “I closed my eyes and thanked every deity I could think of that it was me and not you he was hurting. As long as you were safe, kiddo, nothing else mattered. When it was too much I would go back to the place in my head where I keep all the memories of you to escape.”

“That’s where Dean found you,” Sam murmurs as he rubs his forehead back and forth over the bumps of Gabriel’s horns like he used to do as a child. “In your dreams.”

“Bingo,” Gabriel smiles. “You always were a smart one.” 

“We need to talk,” Sam whispers before pressing a kiss to Gabriel’s left horn. “I don’t understand everything that happened.”

“I know,” Gabriel murmurs nuzzling up against the stubble on Sam’s cheek, enjoying the scratchy drag against his skin. “I’ll tell you everything, I promise.”

Sam hums, pausing to press a kiss to the tip of Gabriel’s nose. Gabriel smirks, something he hasn’t done in so long he wonders if his facial muscles remember how to smile. Before he can voice the concern Sam’s mouth is on his in a brief, tender kiss. 

Something along their link catches fire, desire rockets through him in a way he’s never experienced before, and his tail thrashes out to knock over the bedside lamp as he clings to his human. 

When they break apart Sam looks as stunned as Gabriel. “Things are going to be different now,” Sam says softly, eyes glazed. “Aren’t they?”

Gabriel presses his fingertips to his lips distractedly before answering, “I don’t know what things are going to be like now, Sam.”

Gabriel loved the little boy he had bonded to all those years ago. He’d never spared a second to think about him growing into a man. Sam’s no longer a child, and they’ve been apart for so long this sudden, unexpected feature to their bond is overwhelming. 

“I should clean up,” Gabriel blurts, looking for a way to break the tension building between them, but also suddenly aware of how badly he must smell and look. 

He’s flustered, embarrassed. It’s ridiculous!

But Sam smiles, touches his wing gently, and slips away pointing to a doorway on the other side of the room. “The bathroom’s through there. I left you a towel and washcloth. I’m sorry, but the clothes aren’t really going to fit you very well.”

Gabriel blushes. “No sweat, kiddo. Trust me; it’s got to be better than what I’ve had up till now.”

Sam flinches and Gabriel’s tail curls up to wrap around his wrist. “I’m sorry,” Gabriel breathes as Sam’s fingers pet along the point at the tip of his tail. “Inappropriate humor is an art form for me.” 

Sam nudges him gently toward the shower. “Go get cleaned up, we need to go find the scryer that did this to you and take care of him. Then we can all go on with our lives.”

Gabriel stops, halfway through the door of the bathroom, to say over his shoulder, “Sam, it wasn’t a scryer that did this to me…it was a familiar, one of my people.”

Sam’s face is blank, but the bond between them swirls with fear. Gabriel cocks his head to the side, not understanding what Sam’s seeing over his shoulder. When he turns Gabriel catches sight of what’s frightened his bonded. 

He’s not alone in the bathroom. 

****

_There’s a fire in the fireplace in the corner. The room feels hot, almost stiflingly so. Dean nearly trips over the debris from what looks to be a destroyed table broken apart by hand. He’s edging around it when he catches sight of Castiel to his left._

_His familiar isn’t usually in his dreams. “Cas?”_

_“I followed you under,” Castiel explains as he steps to Dean’s side. “I wanted to see for myself what we might be facing.”_

_What they’re facing is a trashed house. There’s nothing in the whole place not broken in some way or another. It’s like a wrecking crew went through. “What happened here?” Dean asks as he wanders from the main room toward the back of the house._

_“I do not know,” Castiel says as he follows. There’s a slow rumbling growl coming from his familiar, letting Dean know Castiel’s guard is up, that he’s stressed._

_This is not a safe place. Even though Dean’s never been harmed by his visions before it doesn’t mean there’s not a first time for everything. Being with Castiel has turned his whole world on its ear._

_It’s not until they hit the basement that they find something. It’s not what they were expecting._

_Along the walls where they find Gabriel’s cage there are books, artifacts, charms. Dean’s amazed by the collection. Some of these things are items only the most esteemed scryer bloodlines would have access to._

_Then there’s the body. A familiar’s, slumped in the center of a chalked off area, with a knife still clenched in his hand._

_“He killed himself,” Castiel rumbles. “Why do such a thing now?”_

_“He knew he was busted?” Dean offers._

_“No, Dean,” Castiel argues. There’s a look of deep concern on his face that makes Dean worry. “Gabriel may have failed in his mission, but maybe that was part of the plan? This familiar wanted Sam for a reason, wanted him badly enough to torture Gabriel for two decades in order to find him. Everything he’s done up until now had a purpose. We need to think about what the purpose for this action might be.”_

_“It’s tied to Sam,” Dean answers. “Everything about this leads back to Sam.”_

_“So what does Sam do that this familiar would be so desperate as to look for him for so long?” Castiel ponders._

_“Sam could speak to the dead when he was with Gabriel,” Dean blurts. “Oh fuck, Cas. He killed himself but that doesn’t mean Sam is safe.”_

_“It just makes him more dangerous,” Castiel snarls as he launches forward and grabs Dean’s wrist. “We have to wake up NOW!”_

Dean slams into consciousness. Castiel is already launching himself off the couch and roaring toward the bedroom. Dean lunges up to follow, throwing himself through the door to see Castiel skid to a stop. Sam is sitting on the edge of the bed as Gabriel comes walking out of the bathroom still damp from a shower. 

There’s a ghost sitting on the floor near Sam’s feet. 

“Hey guys,” Sam greets them as they stand there panting, looking like idiots. “This is Michael.”

“Um, hi,” Dean offers with a little wave. Castiel is giving him what has to be a ‘what the fuck?’ expression. It almost makes Dean laugh. Almost. 

“We’ve been talking,” Sam shrugs. Dean looks at him closely. For anyone who didn’t know his brother well, Sam looks like he has it all pulled together. But there’s a look in his eyes, he way he’s holding his posture; he’s nervous, uncomfortable. It makes Dean worry even more. 

Then Gabriel comes over, his hair damp, too long pants dragging across the wood floor. His hair reflects the light from the lamp in the corner. Dean watches him settle close next to Sam’s side. He keeps his hands in his lap, but his tail curls around Sam’s hips. It makes something in Dean uncomfortable. There’s a feeling of possessiveness that Dean’s always had when it came to Sam. Gabriel’s stepping on his toes here. 

But then Castiel’s warm fur brushes his arm as his familiar steps closer. His tail curls around Dean’s leg, their shoulders bump. He turns to catch his partner’s gaze and the warm, affection-filled look he finds reflected back at him makes him blush, swelling up with the _just right_ feeling of it. 

Castiel makes him happy; he can’t deny Sam the same chance. 

“What have you crazy kids been talking about?” Dean jokes lamely and winces at his own stupidity. He’s never talked to a ghost before, and the foreboding from his dream is still hanging around his shoulders. 

“Lucifer,” Sam answers. When Dean gives him a blank look he rolls his eyes and adds, “he was Michael’s familiar. Michael is the last of one of the most power families in magic. He was a scryer and Lucifer was his familiar. Michael died forty years ago. He was fighting a demon who overpowered him and took his life.”

“So why is he in your bedroom?” Dean asks as he walks closer. 

“The demon was injured,” Sam makes this face he makes when he thinks something is a really bad idea. “He thought it was too dangerous to be left alive. Michael asked Lucifer to finish it.”

Castiel makes a gasping sound; Gabriel looks down to stare at his bare feet. 

“What?” Dean asks. 

“It would be soul breaking to not be allowed to go with you into the beyond, Dean,” Castiel whispers. “What Michael asked of Lucifer made him an abomination, tainted his soul.”

“Lucifer finished it,” Sam continues after a moment. “He fought the demon and won. But the rift caused by Michael’s request left Michael a ghost so neither of them could move on.”

“Until Sam,” Gabriel whispers. “Because of his gifts. Lucifer had been waiting for someone to manifest with their gifts so early. He thought if he could get his hands on Sam he could twist Sam into gathering souls for him.”

“Why?” Dean doesn’t get it. 

“There’s old magic,” Castiel whispers. “Dangerous, a spell describing the use of a number of souls in order to raise the dead.”

“He wanted Michael back,” Dean whispers. 

“They would have been together forever,” Gabriel nods. “Or at least Lucifer thought so. He needed Sam because Lucifer is unable to speak to the dead. Someone had to do the collecting for him, and he needed so many to make it work it might have taken a very long time. Sam was special; the dead sought him out for help. His soul was pure because he was so young. It’s what the spell required. He came to me, asked for my help. I refused him. Sam deserved a life and Lucifer was twisted, damaged. He started stalking us. I couldn’t do any more to help Sam. Lucifer was too strong. So I blocked his gifts, using the link, and sealed it off before I went to face him.”

“You went to fight Lucifer,” Sam hisses. “For me?” 

“You could survive without me, kiddo,” Gabriel snorts. “Not the other way around. Failing you was never an option. I wouldn’t be here now if it weren’t for your soul bond with Dean.”

“Uh…his what?” Dean interrupts because just, no. 

“The link you have,” Gabriel chuckles weakly. “Deny it all you want, but the four of us are bound together by our links. Once Castiel joined you it made you strong enough to hear my messages. When I knew you were listening I made my choice.”

“You were coming here to kill Sam!” Dean exclaims. 

“No,” Gabriel snaps. “I was sent here to acquire him. If you hadn’t been able to stop me, I admit, I would have killed him to save him from Lucifer’s plan.”

“That’s comforting,” Dean mocks. Gabriel gives him the finger. 

“Shut up, Dean,” Sam snorts. 

Dean can’t hide the grin on his face as Sam curls an arm around Gabriel’s side. He’s pretty sure Sam and Gabriel’s bond isn’t going to be the same walk in the park his and Castiel’s has been, but they clearly have a connection. 

Sam’s got someone now, just like Dean has. They’re going to be okay. 

“Lucifer’s dead,” Castiel states with a flick of his ear. “A spell, inside a circle. We saw it in Dean’s vision. We believe he will be coming this way.”  
“That’s why Michael is here,” Sam nods. “He felt Lucifer’s passing and thought he might be coming for me.”

“So what’s the plan?” Dean asks. “How do you stop a ghost?” 

“You don’t,” Sam says, way too casually for Dean’s taste. “You give them a reason to move on.”

“I don’t get it,” Dean comments. 

Even Castiel sighs in exasperation. “Dean,” he says softly. “Michael is here to help Lucifer move on. We can end this peacefully.”

Dean’s not sure he’s satisfied with that. “So that’s it? Twenty years of suffering for Gabriel, my brother finds out at twenty seven he’s a scryer and his whole life is mixed up, and we do a Touched by an Angel and these guys go off in the light holding hands? That’s fucked up!” 

“That’s life, Dean.” Sam huffs. “You should be happy we don’t have to have some kind of huge war in my bedroom. Let’s just get this handled so we can move on.” 

“So what do we do now?” Dean asks as he flaps his arms. 

“We wait,” Castiel answers. 

Gabriel’s stomach growls loudly. “And eat?” 

“And eat,” Sam laughs as he takes his familiar's hand and leads him toward the kitchen. 

****

“Why can’t I hear him?” Dean asks and points at Michael. 

“You wouldn’t be able to see him if it weren’t for Sam and I being together,” Gabriel points out. “Sam can speak to him based on his abilities, and I can communicate with him because of my connection to Sam.” 

His wings flap out for a moment. It feels good to stretch; in his cage in that basement there wasn’t enough room for him to. Gabriel looks around for a moment and notices no one is paying him any attention. 

Freedom is a funny thing; on some levels so exciting and on others downright frightening. He leans into Sam’s back just a bit and is relieved when Sam leans back. “You okay?’ Sam whispers to him, and Gabriel’s not sure how to answer. 

He must sense his hesitation because Sam cocks his head and turns toward him. “Gabriel, it’s not a trick question.”

“I’m nervous,” Gabriel finally whispers back. “I’m sorry. I know I’m supposed to be your support here but things seem so big. I’m used to being pinned down in a corner. I keep expecting this to be some kind of dream.”

“I’ve got you,” Sam tells him. He curves a long arm around Gabriel’s shoulders, making sure to be careful not to hit where his wings are burned. Once he’s pulled Gabriel tightly to his side, Sam bends, pressing his lips to the top of Gabriel’s head and inhaling. 

Gabriel shivers, moving closer. He’s still not sure what’s going on between them, but the contact feels so good. It’s been so long since he’s felt safe. “You grew up and I missed it,” he murmurs just for Sam to hear. “I hate that.” 

“You’re here now,” Sam says quietly. “Gabriel,” he starts with a sigh. “I don’t know what I can say to you. What you did for me…there just aren’t words.”

“I love you,” Gabriel breathes out into his human’s shirt. “That’s why I did it. I know you don’t remember it, but I felt the call to bond with you the second you were born. I was there when you learned to sit up, when you got the flu the first time and puked all over my wings. I saw you take your fist steps and say your first words. I used to sit on the side of your bed and rub your back when you had a nightmare. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to protect you. Things are different now, you’re not a child. You can make choices for yourself, we can discuss it. But back then…I don’t regret my choices. I just hate that I missed so much of your life. I missed you so much.”

“I think…I missed you too,” Sam answers. “I’ve always felt like something wasn’t right with me, Gabriel. I think what I’ve been searching for is you.” 

Gabriel brings his wings up around them. If he sheds a few tears right then, no one needs to know. Sometimes home isn’t a place, sometimes it’s another person. 

Home feels good. 

When he brings his wings down again, there’s a burger in front of him, with a salad and French Fries on the side. 

“What?” he jokes, before he embarrasses himself totally and just sticks his face in the food. “No beer?” 

Laughter is another thing Gabriel almost forgot he enjoyed. 

The food is fabulous. 

****

“They’re kinda cute,” Dean comments as he leans against the counter top next to Castiel. 

The familiar smiles and leans into his human’s touch as Dean reaches out to scratch along the back of his neck. “I wish I had seen you as a child,” Castiel comments, his hearing picking up bits and pieces of what Sam and Gabriel are talking about. 

“No you don’t,” Dean chuckles. “I was a horrible kid.”

“I doubt that,” Castiel murmurs. He breaks out into a purr when Dean’s hand reaches behind his ear to ruffle his fur. He’s distracted as the temperature in the room starts to drop; it’s not until Michael stands and moves toward the center of the room that Castiel gives the situation his full attention. 

“Dean,” he whispers. “Lucifer is here.” 

Sam slides away from Gabriel. Castiel hears the familiar whispering, “I don’t want to look at him. I can’t.” 

Castiel was expecting something violent, loud, but Lucifer appears in the corner of Sam’s living room with a breeze. He’s not the violent being Castiel had expected from the wreckage in the house in Dean’s vision. 

He’s just a familiar, just like Castiel and Gabriel, looking at his scryer for the first time in a very long time. Michael opens his arms and Lucifer flings himself forward, wrapping himself up in the ghost of his human. It’s beautiful…peaceful. As Castiel watches a light glows around them both and he wonders what must be waiting for them on the other side. 

Neither of them deserved the fate life dealt them. 

But then Lucifer is standing, moving away from Michael to stand in front of Sam. Gabriel’s voice is clear as he pleads, “Make him go away.” 

“I can’t,” Sam answers. “Gabriel, he can’t go until he’s right with you. He needs you to help him move on.” 

“Why would I ever help _him?” Gabriel barks. But then he’s moving around Sam’s body, coming face to face the ghost of his tormentor._

_Castiel contemplates how endless Gabriel’s bravery must be._

_“You ruined my life,” Gabriel spits out as he sees Lucifer._

_Sam closes his eyes, runs his hands up Gabriel’s arms gently, and they watch as Gabriel steadies himself with a deep breath. But then Lucifer drops to his knees, bows down until his forehead is pressed to the ground at Gabriel’s feet._

_“Oh, shit!” Gabriel exclaims as he looks to the ceiling and squirms. “Just get the hell out of here, okay? I get it, I do. But this is the best I can do for you. Go and be with your human…please just leave us alone.”_

_There’s no big climax; one moment they’re there and the next they’re gone._

_“Is it over?” Dean asks after a long moment._

_“Yeah,” Sam smiles, bright like the sun. “They moved on.”_

_“Are you sure there’s no beer?” Gabriel asks, looking pale and shaken._

_Frankly, Castiel is just as grateful as Gabriel when Dean produces some from Sam’s refrigerator._

_****_

_They’re curled up in their own bed later that night when Dean says “Do you think they’ll be okay?” He’s thinking of how Sam and Gabriel looked like they didn’t know what to do with each other when he and Castiel had gotten up to leave._

_They looked so lost._

_“They’ll be fine,” Castiel assures him as he curls around him in bed. “It will take time and work from both of them, but their bond is strong, Dean. They have history. I don’t know if they will ever have what we’re building, but then most scryers and familiars don’t share a sexual relationship.”_

_“Why the hell not?” Dean huffs as he rubs his bare back against the fur on Castiel’s chest, just because it feels good._

_“It’s not something they need to feel connected,” Castiel chuckles._

_“Well, fuck that,” Dean snorts. “Sex is important.”_

_“I agree,” Castiel purrs. “I would not want to miss that portion of our relationship either.”_

_He spends the next hour proving to Dean how important he really thinks the sexual side of their connection is to him. Dean drifts off, relaxed and content, the sound of his familiar’s faint but happy purr lulling him to sleep._

__Sam’s apartment is a mess. There’s a heavily decorated Christmas tree in the corner of the living room. Dean takes a moment to look it over; they never celebrate Christmas._ _

__Even so, there’s bits of wrapping paper everywhere, a new laptop resting against the side of the couch and some old as dirt book perched up against it. Clothing is stacked up on the floor next to the chair facing the tree, and a cat toy poking out of a bag on the table._ _

__He bets the Castiel loves that gift. It could only be Gabriel._ _

__There’s a chorus of laughter coming in from the kitchen. Dean follows the noise to see food piled up all over the counter and Sam up to his elbows in soapy water while Castiel is packing leftovers into Ziploc bags. They don’t look all that much older, though Sam has some grey in his hair._ _

__Dean watches, dumbfounded, as his future self comes stumbling into the kitchen carrying still more food, shoving Gabriel. They’re laughing at something Gabriel said, and Sam flicks water on them both._ _

__The whole scene quickly disintegrates into Sam and Dean, grey hair and all, rolling around on the floor while they wrestle. Gabriel eventually shoos Dean and Castiel back out into the living room with a glass of wine each. Dean watches himself walk by, stopping long enough to look in his general direction and wink._ _

__Of course, his older self would have seen this, and know he was here._ _

__Weird. This is probably why Dean’s never had a vision of himself before. Too complicated._ _

__He turns back to Sam and Gabriel, eyebrows rising up into his hairline as he watches Sam pick Gabriel up and set him on the counter before stepping between his legs and pulling him close._ _

__They kiss, the kind of kissing that lovers who know each other very well do. It’s not rushed or forced, but comfortable, secure. Sam’s almost glowing with happiness, and Gabriel’s looking lighter than Dean had ever thought he would. He hums with pleasure as they break the kiss and settles into a hug, his tail wrapping around Sam’s legs as he presses his face into Sam’s neck._ _

_Dean wakes with a start, Castiel poking him in the ribs. “See?” His familiar grumbles in a rough, sleep-heavy voice. “I told you they would be fine. Now leave us alone and get some sleep.”_

_Dean turns on his side, Castiel’s tail wrapping around his arm. He drifts back to sleep with a smile on his face._


	39. Kiss 39:  Forgiveness

Title: Kiss 39  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Lucifer/Sam  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 529  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Forgiveness.

Kiss 39

“I said I was sorry,” Lucifer blurts on the long car ride home. 

“I know,” Sam sighs. “I heard you the first six times.”

“So what’s the problem?” Lucifer questions, there’s an edge to his tone that clearly makes the other people in the car uncomfortable. 

Gabriel rolls his eyes and snorts, Castiel crowds against Gabriel’s side and as far away from Lucifer as he can get in the back seat. It’s like he doesn’t want to get caught up in the cross fire. 

Dean is clearly seething, his hands clenched on the steering wheel and Sam’s hand clamped around his elbow low enough the boys in the back seat don’t notice. Dean wants to make Lucifer hurt, Sam’s not exactly opposed to the idea but he’ll be damned if they prove Lucifer right today. 

The Winchesters are not just trailer trash. They aren’t unruly hooligans with no respect for anyone or anything. 

They’re just two teenage boys in foster care who happened to get placed with the Novak family. The only possession they had between them was the car they had been living in before they were busted and they’re just lucky Chuck, the Novak boy’s father, let them keep it. 

But it came with a price, Dean has to haul them all back and forth to school in the Impala every day. 

Normally it’s no problem, normally things are quiet. 

But today, they had stumbled out of the back of school after Castiel’s orchestra practice and overheard Lucifer telling his friends about the white trash his father keep taking in. 

The file into the house silently, Dean heading to their room to calm down and Sam going to the kitchen to get a soda before starting on his homework. 

Lucifer follows him in. “Crowley said he thought you were gay.”

“What if I am?” Sam asks with his head held up and his eyes flashing. 

“He was interested in you,” Lucifer shrugs as though that explains everything.

“I’m still not understanding how that is any business of yours?” Sam questions. 

“I wanted to scare him off,” Lucifer’s not looking at him now, staring instead at the soda can Sam’s left on the counter top. “You could do so much better than him; I didn’t want him to bother you.”

“So you decided the best way to get him to leave me alone was to tell him what a worthless piece of shit I am?” Sam pushes, he’s so angry, so hurt. 

“I’m…stupid,” Lucifer whispers. “And so, so sorry, Sam. You have to believe me.”

“No,” Sam snorts. “I don’t.” 

But then Lucifer’s hands wrap around his upper arms and the other boy leans toward him, pressing their lips together in an impulsive kiss, telling Sam a lot about Lucifer’s motivation. “Forgive me,” Lucifer pleads as he nuzzles the said of Sam’s cheek. 

“Yeah,” Sam whispers, dazed and melting into Lucifer’s arms. “Okay.”


	40. Kiss 40:  Blood Addiction

Title: Kiss 40  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Gabriel/Sam  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 604  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – blood addiction.

Kiss 40

“It’s like an addiction with you isn’t it,” Sam accuses to his roommate who happens to once again be watching one of those creepy, gross, real life surgical shows. 

“I’m a med student,” Gabriel exclaims. “I’m learning here.”

“You get off on the gore,” Sam huffs. “Admit it; the blood does it for you.”

“It’s an appendectomy, Sam,” Gabriel explains as points at the television screen. “I am not sexually aroused by surgical procedures.” 

“Liar,” Sam teases. But Gabriel must be feeling off tonight because he clicks off the TV and turns to give Sam his full attention. 

“I’m serious, Sam,” Gabriel announces and he clearly is though it’s a rare thing. “I know you tease me all the time about this blood addiction thing you think I have going but it’s not funny anymore so stop it.”

Sam’s momentarily struck dumb. Gabriel’s never called bullshit on him before. In fact, he’s usually the one that takes the teasing too far. “I’m sorry,” Sam offers. “I wasn’t trying to piss you off.” 

“I know,” Gabriel mutters before sliding back down on the couch with his arms crossed. “It just bothers me; you make me sound like some kind of perverted freak.” 

“You are a perverted freak,” Sam offers as he comes to sit down on the coffee table to look at his friend. 

He’s relieved when Gabriel smiles. “You suck,” Gabriel comments. 

“I know,” Sam feels some of the tension easing away from between them and is grateful for it. Gabriel’s a weird guy, hard to live with sometimes, but he’s a good friend and Sam doesn’t want anything to ruin their relationship.   
“Besides,” Gabriel comments with a wicked grin. “You have no idea what turns me on.”

Sam blinks. It’s an odd shift in their conversation but not an unwelcome one. Gabriel’s not entirely wrong; Sam doesn’t really understand what attracts Gabriel to people. Since they have been roommates Gabriel’s brought home an assortment of different people, both male and female. All have had different backgrounds, majors, likes and dislikes. 

None of them stay long. 

So what does do it for Gabriel?

“Tell me then,” Sam challenges. 

He’s surprises when Gabriel scoots to the edge of the couch until he’s almost between Sam’s legs and puts his hands on Sam’s knees. 

“I like my men tall,” Gabriel begins as he looks at a spot just over Sam’s shoulder. “Something about being able to lean into them for comfort. I like hair I can grab a hold of, I don’t like being in charge.”

Sam’s face must show his disbelief of that statement because Gabriel rolls his eyes before sliding his palms up Sam’s thighs. 

“I’m serious,” Gabriel comments. “I’m a big talker, but I want someone steady, solid, in my life that I can depend on. And I want that person to take charge. I want them to appreciate the way I am, but be able to look past the bullshit.”

He’s probably planning on saying something else but Sam doesn’t care. He’s got an opening here, and Sam’s not stupid enough to miss it. He tugs Gabriel forward with a hand wrapped in the front of his shirt and promptly thrusts his tongue into Gabriel’s mouth while the smaller man groans in pleasure and happiness. 

Sam’s looking past the bullshit, and he likes what he sees.


	41. Kiss 41: ice cream follow up to kiss 23

Title: Kiss 41  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Adam/Elijah  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 604  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – ice cream follow up to kiss 23

Kiss 41

“It’s…lumpy,” Elijah complains as he turns the cone around in his hands. 

“It won’t be for long if you keep just looking at it,” Adam comments and rolls his eyes at the blank look the angel gives him. “You have to eat it before it melts.”

“What if I don’t like it?” Elijah asks. He seems really concerned about the whole thing too. 

“Then we try another flavor,” Adam shrugs. “What’s the big deal?”

“You love ice cream,” Elijah answers as though it somehow explains why this is such an issue. 

Adam sighs and rolls his eyes. Sometimes he wonders if this relationship they are trying to have is even worth it. It’s like no matter how hard they try he and Elijah are on different wave lengths. The odd little red-headed angel is forceful and withdrawn, interesting and confusing. Adam spends most of his time trying to figure out just what the hell is going on between them and what they might possibly mean to one another. 

Thus far, he hasn’t come up with any easy answers. The fact that they have only kissed those two other times isn’t helping. On the bench that day when Elijah was leaving and then in the library, it’s been over a month since then and Elijah hasn’t exactly given Adam any signs that he might like a repeat performance. 

But he’s not leaving either, and the last time someone tried to pick Adam up at a bar he thought the angel was going to tear the whole place apart with his bare hands. 

So clearly, Elijah likes him….maybe he just doesn’t know how to show it. 

He turns to look at his partner, red hair shining in the setting evening sun. Elijah is watching the ice cream melt down the cone and onto his fingers like he’s seeing something fascinating. Adam doesn’t try to stop himself from leaning forward and licking the sticky mix off the back of Elijah’s hand. 

There’s a sound like a sonic boom above him, and Adam knows Elijah’s reacting to his attentions. 

“Try it,” Adam encourages as he pushes the cone toward Elijah’s lips. 

The angel takes a tentative lick, his eyes widening before taking another and another. 

“It’s very sweet,” Elijah mumbles around a mouth full of ice cream. Adam kisses him then, tongue pushing its way into the angel’s mouth to lap at the cold, sticky, sweetness there. When it’s gone he slides back and regards Elijah with a grin. 

He’s shaking all over, feathers floating to the ground all around them. 

“You make me want to sing,” Elijah murmurs. 

“Is that a big deal?” Adam asks. 

Elijah’s hazel eyes open and focus on his face before he answers, “The last time we angels sang was at the birth of the newly born king.” 

Christmas carols have a whole new meaning now.


	42. Kiss 42: Zoo

Title: Kiss 42  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Castiel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 512  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – zoo

Kiss 42

Castiel does not want a den mate. 

The humans at the zoo have clearly lost their minds. He’s made his point completely clear by refusing to even attempt to mate with the females they have introduced in his enclosure. 

He’s not overly fond of females. 

Of course, Castiel, typical of a wolverine, isn’t overly fond of anything really. 

He likes his solitary existence at the zoo. It’s peaceful, safe, and occasionally lonely. 

His caretakers seem almost obsessively focused on the lonely part. 

Still, he’s intrigued when they flatten a picture of another wolverine up against the window of his enclosure. 

This one male, and apparently horribly wounded. Castiel doesn’t understand much of what the humans say to him, but he’s come to understand that this wounded wolverine is named Dean, and that Dean along with his younger sibling were injured protecting their ailing father from a bear. 

It had been a lost cause, as fierce as his kind are, a bear is a bit much. The younger pup, Sam, is to be trained as a greeter. 

Castiel shudders at the idea of so many sticky hands in his fur, touching him places he hesitates to even touch himself. 

But Dean needs a place to recover, and the humans seem to have decided that Castiel’s den is the perfect place. 

He scowls at that, perhaps he should have acted more aggressive in his past meetings with possible mates. 

It’s just not really his nature. 

The next morning the one called Dean limps into his enclosure. He still has fur missing, and wounds that need to be looked after. Castiel attempts to approach him but the other wolverine is frightened, weak. Dean snarls at him, fur standing up all over as he tries to show he can defend himself. 

It’s clear he’s posturing, even Castiel, as unwilling as he is to fight, could beat him right now. But instead of charging, as Dean clearly expects, Castiel flattens himself to the ground with a whine and rolls over to show his belly. 

It’s a tense moment. This other member of his kind is unknown to him, Dean could do damage even in his weakened state. 

But Dean sighs, as though relieved and settles against the tree in the shade, exhausted. 

He doesn’t follow Castiel into the den that night, or the next. 

But the third night Castiel falls asleep alone and wakes with a warm body just barely touching his own. 

Dean whines, smelling of pain, fear, and grief. 

Castiel curls around him, careful not to press against his wounds, and nuzzles Dean’s face as though they were bonded. He’s thrilled when Dean nuzzles back. 

Castiel did not want a den mate, until he got one. Now that he has one he understands why the humans thought it so important.


	43. Kiss 43: Tongue Piercing

Title: Kiss 43  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 563  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – tongue piercing

Kiss 43

“You know you want to try it,” Gabriel teases before flicking out his tongue and wiggling the pierced digit in Sam’s direction. 

Sam doesn’t say no, what would be the point? 

He and Gabriel have been dancing this dance for what seems like forever, since Gabriel was a trickster and Sam just a human. 

Before Archangels and demon blood, before death and vessels, before Sam went to Hell and came back minus a soul, since Dean carved Castiel open like a Thanksgiving turkey and found Gabriel’s grace inside mixed up with all the monsters. 

Since death made it so they all couldn’t die.

He’s lived hundreds of years watching Dean and Castiel fall more into each other. Their bond so strong now that Sam counts Castiel a brother as much as he has always looked to Dean in the same light. Maybe they still aren’t lovers yet; maybe that dance will never end between them. 

But Sam has had six lifetimes worth of dancing with Gabriel and he’s done. 

The new piercing is just an excuse…but a fun excuse. 

Sam reaches out with a growl, tugging and dragging the archangel over until Gabriel’s seated on his lap, straddling his thighs with his own. Gabriel smiles, not the flashy one he shows to everyone. This one is real, sincere, showing Sam how much Gabriel wants this too, how glad he is to be here. 

It’s Gabriel that wraps his hands in Sam’s hair and tugs him closer. He nuzzles the scar carved into Sam’s cheek with his nose before dipping his head to lock their mouths together. 

For a moment all Sam processes is heat, wet, the faint taste of chocolate. Then his tongue bumps the ball seated in Gabriel’s tongue and the Archangel groans and grinds down into Sam’s lap with pleasure. Sam huffs with laughter before flicking at the piercing, stabbing at it with the point of his tongue until Gabriel full out whimpers and tugs his head away. 

There’s a moment when Sam thinks he took it too far, that maybe Gabriel was just joking and he’s going to make fun of Sam for being desperate and get up off his lap to walk away and find someone who doesn’t matter to fall into bed with. 

Sam flinches at the idea of the rejection. He’s so damned lonely. Can’t stand the idea of trying to love someone again and having to watch them age and die while he stays the same. 

It hurts…so fucking much. 

But then there’s pain ripping up Sam’s chest from where Gabriel’s hand is burrowed beneath his shirt. He gasps and his hips buck up at the agony of it. A moment later it’s gone as soon as it started and Gabriel’s blushing, staring at the wall behind Sam’s head like he’s afraid to meet Sam’s gaze. 

“I can’t do casual with you,” Gabriel murmurs. “I’m too old for it, I want a mate.”

Sam tugs up his shirt to find his skin scarred by the seared on print from Gabriel’s hand. 

He rolls his eyes. “You could have just asked.”


	44. Kiss 44: Ferris Wheel

Title: Kiss 44  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 542  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Ferris wheel – preferably stuck on it.

Kiss 44

He doesn’t remember who started it. 

It probably doesn’t matter anyway. 

Castiel’s only minutely aware of the cool night breeze against his hair before Dean’s warm, callused, hand grips the unruly locks and tugs him closer. 

The seat shakes and he tenses for a moment. Fears he never thought he would have about falling and crashing into the ground bursting into being in his mind. 

He could fly once, never thought once about being afraid. 

But then Dean’s other hand cups his cheek and Castiel can’t do anything but open his mouth on a whine invite Dean’s tongue inside. He wants this, has always wanted this, even when he didn’t understand what this exactly was. 

But wanting is one thing, and having another. Castiel never thought he would be allowed to have this moment. 

Too much distance between them to cover and then recover once he fucked it all up. 

Too much to forgive, too much explain, too much to learn. 

Dean swore he wasn’t made to be a teacher…Dean’s a filthy, lying little shit. 

But oh, can he kiss. It’s like he’s flying again, like long ago sacrificed wings are springing from his back. He could escape this contraption so long as Dean never stops kissing him. He could burst free of this human construction and lower them both safely to the ground. 

But then Dean is slipping away and Castiel simply cannot allow it. He’s moving, straddling Dean’s lap and ignoring the way the stupid car pitches and rolls while he squirms. 

He waited so long. He’s been so lost. 

Never thought he would get this chance. 

His hands in Dean’s hair then, sliding through the slightly longer cut to tug gently, some things you simply don’t forget, no matter how long it’s been. 

Dean still smells the same, smells like coming home. 

“Easy, Tiger,” Dean whispers gruffly when he finally forces Castiel back long enough to breathe. “Some of aren’t as young as we used to be. You don’t want to get arrested for sexually assaulting a geriatric.”

Castiel blushes, leans away long enough to take in Dean’s evergreen eyes, now surrounded by crows feet and highlighted by white and blond eyebrows. His grin is just as cheeky as it always was, though now the freckles on his face are stretched and hidden by wrinkles. 

He looks refined, glorious, aged to a level of perfection Castiel never though Dean would see. 

It had taken Castiel a long time to fall and be born, to grow into adulthood. It had taken ten years of fruitless searching for a man thought long dead before Castiel had stumbled into Dean and Sam at this amusement park tonight. 

Castiel turned thirty this year. Dean’s now a man of his sixties and all the more beautiful for it. 

“All I see is you,” Castiel whispers as the tears come. 

“Yeah,” Dean snorts but his touch is loving. “You always were weird like that, Cas.”


	45. Kiss 45: Fast Cars - Even Faster Hands

Title: Kiss 45  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Gabriel  
Rating: Nc-17  
Word Count: 580  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Fast Cars – Faster Hands.

Kiss 45

It’s probably not regulation for Gabriel to not wear anything under his fire retardant suit, but Sam could frankly give less than a fuck right now. 

It makes it so much easier to get him off. 

He doesn’t remember when this little game of theirs started, only that Gabriel had been the one to press the go switch. Months of teasing on the circuit at races had Sam primed to punch the little shit in the face. It hadn’t mattered to him at the time that Gabriel had earned his stripes as a much older and more experienced racer. Sam might be the new kid, but he was far from naive. 

Then he had found himself alone in the garage with Gabriel, the smaller man sliding a hand that Sam simply could not look away from over his own crotch, head tipped back, eyes almost shut, while Sam panted and stared until Gabriel rubbed himself off without undoing his jeans. 

They only touched themselves at first. 

Sam thinking it was a sick joke before he finally gave up all pretense of not wanting to participate and crowded into Gabriel’s personal space at their next competition and slides his hand into his loose jeans, stroking until he comes all over his hand. 

Gabriel looks like he bit his lip so hard it drew blood. 

It gets easier after that, no less strange, but easier. They fight like school age children out in front of the public but once they end up alone they press in closer and closer to one another and bring themselves off staring into each others eyes. 

Sam should have considered where this whole thing might be going. He’s a smart guy and even if he wasn’t his brother had warned him. 

It’s only a few months later when he finds himself leaning into Gabriel’s space and inhaling his scent, catches himself coming thinking of what Gabriel’s skin might taste like, what he would feel like tucked against Sam’s chest at night. 

It’s dangerous, and stupid. The more Sam thinks about getting closer the louder and meaner Gabriel gets on the track. Sam’s not sure if it’s that Gabriel can tell Sam’s mentally overstepping the boundaries or if Gabriel’s just as lost as he is. 

Either way it has to stop. 

So when Gabriel crowds in next to him that afternoon he shakes his head and whispers, “No.”

Gabriel stalks away, and Sam hisses his discomfort out through his teeth. 

The next race, a week later and Sam turns to find Gabriel closer to his side than the other man has ever been. There’s a pause, as though Gabriel thinks Sam might punch him, before Gabriel leans forward and kisses him like he’s been dying to do it for months. 

Which is how they ended up like this….Sam removing Gabriel’s suit to find him naked and shivering underneath it; Sam finally getting to touch, taste, learn this man that’s driven him nuts. 

Sam, getting his revenge for months of dysfunctional flirting by driving Gabriel over the edge in seconds with the rapid flicking of his wrist while his hand is wrapped around Gabriel dick…he’s always been good with his hands.


	46. Kiss 46: Curiosity

Title: Kiss 46  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Sam/Uriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 552  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Curiosity.

Kiss 46

“You want me to what?” Sam asks, dumbfounded by the angel’s request. 

“Kiss me,” Uriel responds managing to look aloof and demanding at the same time. 

“No!” Sam blurts before he gathers his stuff up in his too long arms and starts stalking away. 

“Coward!” Uriel calls out from behind him and Sam freezes in his tracks. 

He’s not a coward. No Winchester is a coward. Sam might be a half breed. Might be the only half breed allowed to live in Heaven based on what his parents sacrificed during the war with the demons. But he’s not a coward. 

“Say it to my face,” he snarls as he turns. He can feel his horns erupting out of his forehead, his tail thrashing behind him. He knows his eyes must be black. 

Uriel gives him that shit eating smile that’s all confidence and narcissism. 

He fucking hates Uriel. 

“Coward,” the angel repeats as his wings twitch. 

Sam’s probably going to get expelled for it, Dean already cutting a path through the Heavenly higher education system with his terrible behavior and penchant for plucking the feathers out of poor, odd Castiel’s wings before they became a couple. 

Sam’s tried hard not to live up to his sibling’s reputation…until today.

He grabs Uriel so hard the angel gasps and bends him so far backward his wings drag the ground. Then Sam slams their mouths together with a brutality he wishes he didn’t possess. But he’s too far gone to care if he’s just proving Uriel right. It’s hard being singled out all the time, hard being the only one. 

There’s a flash of light off the side of them and hands, stronger than they should be dragging him away from Uriel while the angel sits on the ground and pants with glazed eyes. Uriel raises a trembling hand to his lips as though he can still feel Sam there. 

Sam spits, wanting nothing of him left behind. 

“Did you get your answer?” he hears Gabriel whisper to the other angel. 

Uriel nods, slowly, like he’s dazed. 

“Then go,” Gabriel orders harshly, “and never let your curiosity lead you to do something this stupid again.”

Uriel’s gone in a blink. Sam wishes he had that ability. 

“Stupid, huh?” he snarls at Gabriel. Gabriel’s been kind to him, mostly. Sam doesn’t have a reason to be so angry…but he hurts. “Is it because I’m part demon? That’s what makes kissing me a mistake?”

Gabriel looks at him like he’s lost his mind. “No, Sam…it’s because Uriel had no right to approach you. You’re not meant for him.”

“I’m not meant for anyone,” Sam snaps. Angel’s feel a pull to mate, to bond; Sam’s not enough of one to experience the urges. It’s just another painful way he’s different. 

“If only you knew how wrong you are, Kiddo.” Gabriel’s voice sounds sad, choked off and strained. Sam’s eyes shoot up to meet his but he’s not fast enough. 

Gabriel’s disappearing, and Sam’s left behind with his pain…and the tiniest bit of hope. 

**Kiss 46 – Continuation**

Gabriel had been a child at the end of the Great War. He had stood next to his mother on the street when John Winchester had carried his mate back through the gates of Heaven for the last time. 

The angels had been victorious, winning out over the demonic forces of Hell and securing the future for their kind…but at a terrible price. 

Mary Winchester had been sent on a mission by the Father, she had taken flight into Hell to deliver a plan of action for peace to the demon ruler. Instead of the safe passage he had promised, she was captured, tortured, and experimented on for a long, terrible year. 

Gabriel’s mother had helped raise Dean during that time and Gabriel had spent many nights by the child’s bed, whispering to him as he cried for his mother. 

The fact that she lived through the experience was nothing but a miracle in itself, but that life had thrived inside her in such a horrible place was even more surprising. 

Gabriel remembers her hugely swollen belly as John carried her to the healers. He heard the whispers of the crowd about her being found in such a state, but Dean had already told them she was with child. She had been pregnant when she was sent on the mission and her will to save her unborn child was all that sustained her. 

Sadly, Mary would never hold her youngest son. Though Gabriel’s mother and the other healers worked tirelessly throughout the night, her grace was too far gone to be healed. Mary Winchester’s grace left her body just as Sam’s entered his. Gabriel had always hoped perhaps they connected for a moment as they passed between worlds. 

Sam’s life was a gift to the angels, something precious, though it was apparent right away that Mary’s child was not unaffected by the torments of Hell. 

Sam was born…wrong. He had no wings. Instead he had a tail, and tiny horns protruded from his brow. 

Gabriel remembers watching as John Winchester gathered his brave mate’s body to his chest once more. He remembers the way Mary’s honey colored wings dragged across the stone of the floor while John rocked her and cried. He thought, at the time, there could be nothing worse than the pain of losing your mate. 

He was wrong. All these long years later Gabriel is certain the worst pain is finding your mate and never being able to form the bond to ease the longing you feel throbbing inside you. 

*****

Gabriel had wondered at first, when his classmates began pairing off. He’d considered the possibility that maybe he was just a late bloomer, or that perhaps the angel he was meant for just lived very far away. So he traveled for a few years, roaming through Heaven while he waited for his grace to tell him his mate was nearby, was ready for him. 

He never found anyone. 

By the time he returned home, many years had passed, and Gabriel had come to the conclusion he was going to be alone forever. There was no one for him in the world. He took a job as a healer with his brother, Balthazar. They had always made a good team, if a little brash. 

He enjoys healing, the way his people’s grace links with his for those few precious moments. It gives Gabriel the closest thing to bonding he’s ever experienced. It's a feeling he cherishes.


	47. Kiss 47: In the Park

Title: Kiss 47  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Bobby/Rufus/Crowley  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 513  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – In the Park.

Kiss 47

“We’re old,” Rufus comments as they sit under the tree and watch the children and young couples make their way through life around them. 

“Speak for yourself,” Bobby grumbles as he resettles his hat on his head. “I’m not trying to look at it that way.”

“You can look at it anyway you want,” Rufus snorts. “It’s all sagging the same direction.”

“Not all of it,” Crowley chuckles from their left. “I may be aging but I prefer to think of myself as fine wine. There are bits of me still standing at attention.” 

“You mean whine with an H, right?” Bobby teases. “That’s all you do anyway…whine, whine, whine.”

“Next thing you’re going to tell me is that Viagra is cheating,” Crowley chuckles. 

“Who needs Viagra,” Rufus huffs. “I just need a shoe in so I can get started.”

“If you’re trying to put a shoe in you got bigger problems than Viagra can fix anyway, old man,” Bobby laughs. 

“Shut up,” Rufus chuckles. “I’m trying for nostalgic here and you’re ruining my flow.”

“You have no flow,” Bobby teases with a smile. “Never had flow, sure don’t have it now.”

“Neither of you has the sense God gave a flea,” Crowley complains as he settles back into the grass. “Explain to me again how I ended up in this old man club of yours?”

“You’re old,” Rufus points out. “Older than us even.”

“And you had nothing better to do,” Bobby adds. “Demons and hunters are not supposed to live long enough to retire. What did we do wrong?”

“It had to be the Winchesters,” Crowley sighs. “I should have run the second I saw them coming.”

“Then you wouldn’t have us,” Rufus says teasingly. 

“Indeed,” Crowley comments before reaching up and tugging the older hunter down for a kiss. 

“What’s that for?” Rufus asks when they part. 

“It’s rare I get to do something new anymore, as old as I am,” Crowley answers with a shrug. “You two would be….an experience.”

“Both of us, huh?” Bobby comments and the demon shrugs. 

“Hell,” Bobby sighs as Rufus winks at him and Crowley smiles. “I got nothing better to do.”

He kisses Crowley first, more to make Rufus wait than anything else. His old friend snorts in irritation but when Bobby reaches up to drag him down to their level he sure doesn’t complain. He hears a shriek, probably from a concerned parent before Crowley snaps them away to a swanky room with a huge bed. Probably a good idea, he would hate having to explain to his boys how he got arrested for indecent exposure rolling in the grass with Rufus and Crowley. But still, Bobby figures he’s in for an interesting few days. 

Looks like you can teach old dogs some new tricks.


	48. Kiss 48: Summer Love

Title: Kiss 48  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 505  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Summer Love.

Kiss 48

“So we’re leaving tomorrow,” Dean comments as he sits next to his new friend and watches the sun setting over the lake. 

“I know,” Castiel murmurs, shoulders hunched over more than normal, like he’s folding in on himself. 

“Don’t do that,” Dean pleads with his chest tight and everything he never wanted to risk revealing crawling up his throat and threatening to burst free. “I’ll stay in touch, we can email, I’ll call you.”

“It’s kind of you to say,” Castiel whispers but he doesn’t sit up or look Dean in the eye and it’s suddenly too much for Dean to take. 

He wants this, wants this boy more than he’s ever wanted anyone. 

He fumbles for some way to fix this, make it better, and when he finds nothing Dean reverts back to his default setting. 

He’s going to lose Castiel. But he can at least make sure the other boy never forgets him. He leans over, hands shaking more than they ever have during Dean’s stolen moments of intimacy. Castiel flinches at the first touch, just like he always has. 

It’s like no one ever really touches him. 

But then he exhales, leans closer to Dean and turns just enough to look at him, to make it perfect. When their lips brush Dean makes a noise at the warmth shooting through him. Castiel gasps, leans backward for a moment before shoving forward, cupping Dean’s face between his hands and kissing back. 

He’s a terrible kisser, and something inside of Dean is so happy about that, it means Castiel hasn’t kissed enough people to get any technique. So Dean steadies him, teaches him the basics of this dance involving lips and tongues and teeth. Castiel’s shaking all over when they come up for air. 

“My first kiss,” he stammers. 

If Dean was hard before, he’s dying now. 

“More?” He asks. 

In the morning, he’ll go home heartsick, the taste of Castiel still in his mouth, the feel of his hands still on his body. Dean will email him, call a few nights a week over the next few months until Castiel stops answering and Dean gets scared. Castiel’s family is religious and he had told Dean he was catching a lot of flack for their frequent conversations and whispered but heartfelt ‘I love you’s.’ 

Then he’ll steal his father’s car and drive across three states in the middle of the night until he’s banging unrepentant on Castiel’s front door with his heart in his throat. Castiel parents will be pissed, his father ready to murder him. Things will be a complicated mess but he won’t care as long as he can have Cas. 

Dean’s young, stupid in love with this boy from the summer. 

And the boy loves him too.


	49. Kiss 49: Accidental

Title: Kiss 49  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Dean/Cas  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 529  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Accidental.

Kiss 49

Dean rolls into consciousness next to a warm, solid presence at his side. It’s not his usual morning wake up call. Dean sleeps alone. He’s not dating anyone. 

This might be awkward, especially since he doesn’t remember much past hitting the bar with Castiel last night. 

He’s never brought anyone back to the apartment before. He must have been totally drunk. 

Dean’s counting himself lucky he got home at all. He’s just about to try and scoot away from the frankly too-comfortable-to-be-real body curled up next to him when the other person shifts, rolls, nuzzles their way up the side of Dean’s neck to press a lazy, sleepy kiss just below his ear. 

His bed partner has stubble…and a penis. 

A hard penis. 

Dean jerks once the reality of the fact that he’s sharing his bed with not just a strange person he doesn’t remember, but a strange guy he doesn’t remember. This is so not happening right now. He’s got to get out of this bed and get this dude the hell up out of his house before Castiel wakes up and makes fun of him for the rest of his life. 

Dean slides off the side of the bed into heap on the floor of his room and panics, hard core panics, until a rumpled brown head appears over the edge of the bed peering down at him with crystal clear blue eyes. 

“Dean?” Castiel questions sleepily. “Are you alright?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Dean snaps.

“You fell off the bed,” Castiel replies, cocking his head to the side as though Dean is being completely irrational. 

“We were in bed together,” Dean accuses. 

Castiel blinks slowly. “Yes,” he answers just as slow. “We went to sleep together last night.”

“You were kissing my neck,” Dean blurts then flushes pink all the way up to the top of his head. He can feel how hot his face is. 

Castiel does another one of those long blinks, this time he looks…sad. “It was a mistake,” Castiel comments. He’s scoots down the end of Dean’s bed and scrambles nervously to his feet, refusing to look Dean’s direction. “I thought you were someone else.”

“You’re lying,” Dean comments. He knows his roommate; they’ve been friends for as long as dean can remember. He can tell when Castiel’s hiding the truth. 

“Let it go, Dean.” Castiel orders as he heads toward the bedroom door. “This was all a mistake.”

Dean watches him leave, listens until he hears the door to Castiel’s room slam uncharacteristically down the hall. 

He listens until he hears something that sounds like a choked off sob coming from his friend. 

Then he crawls back up on his bed while his room spins around him and buries his face in the pillow as he fights back his own urge to sob out his frustration. 

His sheets smell like Cas.


	50. Kiss 50: Instructional Demonstration – Follow up to Kiss 14.

Title: Kiss 50  
Author: Gedry  
Pairings: Castiel/Gabriel  
Rating: PG - 13  
Word Count: 629  
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.   
Beta: none  
Spoilers:  none  
Warnings: None  
Summary: Written for 50 first kisses – Instructional Demonstration – Follow up to Kiss 14.

Kiss 50

“I’m not going to be able to do this,” Gabriel hisses as they approach the front door of the condo belonging to Gabriel’s closest friends in Las Vegas. “I’m going to fuck it up, call you my brother, do something stupid. We should just go home.”

Castiel regards him with no small amount of frustration before reaching out and pressing the door chime. 

Gabriel’s mouth flops open like a fish and Castiel braces himself for a very uncomfortable evening. 

It turns out he was very mistaken. Kali is charming, her husband Baldur even more so. They have fun evening eating her home cooked meal and Castiel takes great enjoyment in embellishing a first meeting for Gabriel and himself involving mixed up coffee orders at the local shop in their hometown and Castiel writing his number on the cup before leaving it with Gabriel to find. 

Gabriel watches him intently, eyes warm and that affectionate, somewhat crooked smile plastered on his face that makes Castiel feel warm all over and want to squirm in his seat. 

By the time they retire to the living room for drinks he’s given up all pretense of trying to be formal and respect Gabriel’s boundaries. Gabriel seats himself on the couch and Castiel slips to the floor to curl between his feet and recline between his legs. 

There’s a long pause before Gabriel reaches out to slide his hand around the back of Castiel’s neck, fingertips trembling, palm warm and reassuring against Castiel’s skin. 

He drifts in an out of the conversation. Gabriel picks up the tale of the coffee shop and creating a vivid story of their nonexistent first date culminating in a kiss that supposedly melted his socks. 

Castiel snorts. 

“I didn’t know you had it in you, Gabriel,” Kali chuckles as she sits in Baldur’s lap. “I don’t know if I believe you’re capable of so much passion.” 

Gabriel shrugs dismissively and perhaps that is as far as it would have gone if not for Baldur challenging, “Prove it. Show us you’re passionate side. I’ve known you for years and you’ve only ever sneered at romance. I want to see what it is about this guy that makes you light up inside.” 

Gabriel glares, sudden tension in the room as Kali gives her lover a pointed glare and elbows him. But Baldur’s not backing down and Gabriel won’t either. 

Castiel turns; kneeling between Gabriel’s parted legs to drape himself across his brother and now lover’s chest. This is the first time they’ve been intimate outside of the confines of the apartment they share. He can feel Gabriel’s heart pounding in his chest. “Come on,” he whispers. “Let’s show them how it’s done.” 

And Gabriel tugs him in close and tangles their tongues together in a way that makes Castiel moan like a woman in one of those stupid porn films. He feels like he’s on fire, like Gabriel’s going to burn him up and take him apart. 

When it’s over, Castiel collapses against Gabriel’s chest with a groan and wishes they were alone so he could do something about the fire burning in his gut. 

He turns his head to regard their hosts with interest, wondering if they got what they wanted. 

Kali is biting her lip her eyes slightly glazed at the sight of them. Baldur’s dropped his drink onto the pristine cream carpet but he doesn’t seem to notice. 

Gabriel ruffles his hair and whispers, “I love you.”


End file.
